A Little Dose of Crazy

Lists

2012-01-11T20:33:00.000-08:00

List of what I did today:

Got up (HUGE accomplishment)

Showered, etc.

Dressed in heels

Caught up with Ms. Jones. She's the bomb.

Started grading papers

Helped students

Collected fundraising money

Helped more students

Started 1st period

Helped a lot of students

Worked on grading the same papers

Met with the department chair and Assistant Principal 2nd period

Started 3rd period without the papers graded

Tried to uncover the papers I was grading

Played a vocabulary review game with 4th period. It was intense.

Lunch.

Listened to Creative Writing from my students.

Tried to grade more papers.

Worked on the course catalog for our department.

Said a lot of curse words to myself.

Administrator came back in.

I almost cried.

But I didn't.

I spoke my mind instead.

Collected more money for the Educational Travel Club.

Thought about how this club may get these kids to Rome and Greece this summer. Sweet.

Helped several students after school before a 504 meeting.

REALLY helped a great girl so she can succeed in my honors class.

Packed up the same papers I started grading before school to grade tonight from home.

Rushed to in-laws to pick up Briggs.

Left in-laws grateful (once again) for all they do to help their kids and grandkids.

Got home to crack the homework whip.

Drove to Orr Middle School to watch Kenzie cheer.

Watched the bball team win.

Had to follow the bus to the school instead of bringing Kenz home so they could have a meeting.

Came home to dinner cooked by Tyler. (LOVE THAT MAN... have I mentioned he's going vegan?)

Checked facebook while eating dinner and pushing Kenz to do her homework.

Gave Briggs spaghetti with ketchup so he'd quit whining about wanting to eat it. Gross.

Send Brevin, Brock and Tyler running while I bathed Briggs.

Bathed Brevin and Brock when they came home winded while Tyler finished running.

Killed a scorpian.

Nagged Kenzie.

Finally took off my heels for the day. Ahhhh.

Carried my school papers in to my bedroom to grade from bed.

PJs on.

Checked email.

Updated Scrapfest blog.

Started to get a visual aura.

Got really annoyed by that.

Decided to blog anyway.

Can't really see straight because I am clearly getting a migraine.

Cursed out loud about the migraine.

Worried that I will be throwing up tonight from said headache.

Going to take some pain med and go to sleep.

Will transport papers back to school and pray they get graded before third period tomorrow.

Cheers y'all!

Greetings from the brink

2012-01-10T20:51:00.000-08:00

I heard on the radio this morning that by today, ten days after the first of the year, is when people first slack on their new resolutions for the year. I found it incredibly interesting that in the falling short category of meeting my goals I was excelling (quite the paradox, right?!) I have much more pragmatic approach to goals being an ongoing process as opposed to an expectation (that I will inevitably fall short of) so I wasn't down on myself or anything. At the same time, I nodded my head that I was one of the statistics mentioned on the super reliable 94.1 morning show. [and yes, please don't judge me, I listen to Mark and Mercedes in the morning.]

Speaking of statistics, we are one of the most people in the world who were hit with the stomach bug this past weekend. Barf fest 2012 as my friend Moana called it when it hit her house last night. If you missed my bemoaning and complaining on facebook (YES! another statistic that I meet . . . being one of those annoying facebook posters who complains about illnesses!) Brock got the stomach bug AT school (poor kid allllllmmmmost made it to the toilet. And by poor kid you know I mean poor custodial staff at Wiener Elementary!) and was out of commission until Friday. Just as he started to rebound, Brevin was taken down and by midnight Friday Briggs was tossing his dinner. And on Saturday, Caylee was the last victim [so far...haha]. LUCKILY, Tyler and I escaped praying to the porcelin gods all weekend, but I am not gonna lie. Everything I ate this past weekend made me wonder, "Am I gonna regret this if it comes back up." It's kinda a good diet plan. ;) Just to keep the germ spreading to the minimum, we did refrain from spreading germs at a birthday party, church, and a family get together to celebrate my niece's 13th birthday. AND THAT WAS THE WORST PART of the whole thing! Fine, have a kid puke all over his bed and then roll in it (thank you amateur 3 year old) so I am doing laundry and cleaning bedsheets and children at midnight; okay, crap your pants WHILE you're throwing up and leave it for Dad to clean up because you're still too young to figure out how to manage all those fluids at once; great, deal with an overly emotional daughter who moans and whimpers for an hour as she is fighting the feeling to upchuck even though we keep telling her it's going to feel better, BUT kill my social life and I might get a little cranky. I was in a serious depressed funk by the end of Sunday and completely barn sour [read: sick of being cooped up.] I understand it was the responsible thing to do, but now that the whole world is being infected (seriously, so many kids in elementary and middle schools are being hit... high school is next, I am sure) I am reminded of my mantra that if it's out there, you're gonna get it anyway, so why use so many percautions. *Sigh. Not to really complain about the whole thing, the bookends of the weekend were my favorite: dinner at Grimaldis with good friends Friday night before it all went crazy and visiting my in-laws Sunday night [since we figured they'ed been exposed by virtue of babysitting the sicko kids all last week.] I am a girl that likes to be out and about, that's for sure.

The compensation for NOT getting the stomach bug was a killer head cold which is gratefully moving into my chest. Do-able. I sound very manly and lecturing today was interesting, to say the least. Hopefully I can keep my voice at least through finals next week. Happy winter season.

And by happy winter, I mean, happy to be suffering all this misery when our winter is only 60 degrees cold. What on earth am I whining for? Peace and love home-peeps.

The funny thing about family stories

2012-01-05T16:16:00.000-08:00

Dug this treasure out of the May 2008 file.

At bedtime, my boys like to hear stories. They don't care if they're made up or not, but they do particularly enjoy true stories about Tyler and me when we were growing up. I've learned I can never go wrong with the story about me barfing in the school parking lot or with the one where I got busted by my dad at our neighborhood bike track after he told me to stay home and keep my bike put away. Night before last Brevin asked me about the night he was born and I could give him some sketchy details at best. I couldn't really remember the particulars about his birth. Whoops. Product of being our middle child, I s'pose. That AND the fact that 4 out of my 5 births have been middle of the night-ers and all my boys started pretty similar. I actually had the thought that I was going to have to call my sister to get most of the details of their births since she has a memory like a trap and has been there every time my kids were borned.

Today's after school activity once homework was done should have been to unload the dishwasher and put away clothes. However, instead I pulled up the pictures we have on the computer from the three boys births and I narrated their stories from a couple weeks before up until their blessing day. They were most interested in how their older siblings reacted to them and how big I was the days before birth. I was surprised at how much they weighed since I don't keep that info on my mind file. . . I know Kenz was my biggest at 7#15, but the rest gets kinda fuzzy. It kinda got me excited for Scrapfest in a couple weeks so I can actually record some more of the family memories before I forget more and more of the deets.

After the kids had their fill, I went back and looked at some of the old pictures and was loving on all the pictures of my nieces and nephews who've grown up with our kids. How blessed I am to have my kids have their cousins as such good friends. There's nothing more awesome than 2 year old little boys (Hayden and Conner) digging in the dirt and have another picture of the two of them as 8 year olds! So fun. Since today's my niece Sydney's birthday, I was marvelling at how she is 13!!! years old today. All the pictures of her and Kenz kinda made my heart swell a bit realizing 2/3 or their time with their folks has passed. Before we know it they'll be headed to college together. (Erin and I have already picked out their dorms at BYU... have y'all seen the new DT dorms? Gorgeous.)

When Tyler got home and started to make dinner (he's on this vegan kick) he wondered aloud what I was doing looking at pictures. I told him how the kids and I were trippin' down memory lane. His response was, "who cares? It's all about the future." Of course, he's just giving me a hard time. I do think a lot more about the future, but I LOVE remembering the past. We've been blessed with such good people and family in and out of our lives the past 15 years and it's fun to remember specifically (with the aid of pictures for me who is memory deficient) those events and times and cute baby outfits and the time when I could afford fake nails and ward parties and young men/young women activities, etc.

(And trust me... I found some doozies of many of you who are actually reading this post. I'm tempted to make a facebook album of random pictures from the Barlow family files... they may consider that file for the technological Smithsonian one day. THAT's how good some of them are!)

I am headed back to the school for a hot session of grading tonight, so I will miss story time when bedtime comes. See. . . it's a good thing we spend the afternoon doing that [read: doing nothing but looking at pictures this afternoon] instead! Peace out!

A day when my life got better

2012-01-04T20:55:00.000-08:00

I have blogged two days in a row... now I am feeling all this pressure. There are still about ten of you who are reading and that kinda stresses me out. Just be warned. I really don't have a ton of exciting things to write about. Read at your own risk. Yadda, yadda, yadda.

So, I do have something I want to record for all posterity. The crush I have on one of my sisters-in-law, Stacy. I really love her. A lot. The past couple months have sealed the deal and I would like to dedicate this post to her.

Nate, Stac, and Zoee at their wedding. June 2006

For those of you don't know my brother, Nate, he's #3 of the 5 Garrard kids. Instead of the stereotypical forgotten middle child, Nathan was a rock star. He was the firstborn son and as my "oldest" male counterpart, he and I have similar take control personalities (although, I do recognize he is nowhere near as bossy and particular as me.) To illustrate how important Nate is to our family, allow me to share a story. One night, in the midst of Nate serving his two year mission for the church, my mom had a dream that all her kids died. It was one of those wake up sobbing stories. Ya know, devastating and stuff. Later in the morning after she had composed herself, Mom called me to tell me about her dream, and she ended the retelling with (and this is a direct quote), "the whole thing was so sad, but I was most sad that Nathan died." Well then. There ya go. Kinda rearranged the pecking order right thar. But really, I get it. Nate's a good guy. He was never a little brother that I "couldn't stand" or anything. Sure, he was quirky and marched to the beat of his own drummer (and to his own hair stylist), but I've always been grateful to have the siblings I've had, Nate included. [I seriously can't remember having a fight with Nate growing up . . . perhaps some of the other family can remember more than me...]

Anyway, fast forward (or rewind) or whatever and Nate found himself with a kid and a wife [yes, in that order] and that whole thing isn't that important. BUT what is important is that when he got a wife, we (the Garrard clan) gained the one and only Stacy Layton. We've all agreed, we really scored in that deal.

Stacy is funny. There's no question she is afraid to ask . . . to anyone. She is honest and transparent and REAL. I can always count on Stacy keepin' it real and saying things that nobody has the nerve to say. . .out loud. She is a good mom and an excellent wife to her "huzz," my brother. AND there's the small wondrous factor that she has provided me with a niece and two nephews who are cute and so friggin smart and fun and funny. Once she bet Tyler $100 we'd have a 6th kid. She hasn't given up the hope even though we've both literally been sterilized... and she doesn't pass up the opportunity to let us know how it could work out to her benefit. She has said some classic (not-even-appropriate-for-the-blog) things since I've known her and she'll laugh at herself as much as she'll laugh at someone else. It. Is. REFRESHING.

So, a couple months ago when my brother, Nate, had this brain aneurysm mess [recap: Nate had a brain aneurysm and then a craniotomy and then a gnarly infection and then a long recovery] and my love for Stacy increased a badillion fold. The whole thing has been awfully tough and mostly I've just watched the whole thing go down. In all my empathetic emotions for my brother, nothing has surpassed the emotions I have felt for Stacy. For a while, there was no way to know what Nate's prognosis would be and the agony of that uncertainty would have pushed me into a loony bin. Stac was ah-maz-ing. She talked with people, kept a positive perspective, balanced raising 3 kids with an incapacitated husband, blogged, faced groups of people with never ending questions DAY AFTER DAY AFTER DAY. And the whole time she loved my brother more and more. And I loved her more-r and more-r. I was just super grateful for Stacy being Stacy.

In my life, I was blessed with one sister and then I inherited another sister when I married Tyler. Since Lexi was always around and part of my life she felt like a little sister automatically. Being married and my brothers marrying has also provided me with 5 more "sisters" and I am so blessed to have these women in my life. I could seriously write a whole post about Erin, Lexi, Amy, Mindie, Stacy, Emily, or Melinda, but tonight I want Stacy to know she holds a big fat place in my heart. She can pretty much not do much wrong in my book. Her farts even smell good ;)

Stacy,

Thanks for all you do and for loving our family. I know sometimes you love us just because we're lovable, sometimes it's for Nate, and sometimes it's because you have to and in any way it comes, I appreciate you accepting us. We joke that your impression of the Garrards was us up on some pedestal when, in reality, it is you who is far above us. Thanks for being such a good mom to your kids and letting them be friends with my kids. Thanks for loving my kids and my husband and for being interested in them (including *interviewing* Tyler so you could get to know him better.) You forged a hard road being the first daughter-in-law and I'm so grateful for the friendship I share with you and for the ones you have with Erin and Emily, too. It really is nice having a sisterhood. Another thing I love about you is your testimony and example of faith. In such a good, loving, un-forceful way you set a wonderful example to our family and those around you of what is right and true. We are blessed to have you and I love your guts!

Love ya always and forever,

Sarah

To quote the great Jerolyn, "They're living the dream."

2012-01-03T21:37:00.000-08:00

Schofield Middle School Cheerleaders 2012

Have I ever told you the story about when I tried out to be a cheerleader? It's heartbreaking and devastating and completely hilarious [in hindsight.] I am not kidding nor exaggerating when I say my failure to make the 9th grade cheer team at Chaparral High School in 1991 shaped the well-adapted, completely-over-the-cheer-thing, not-interested-in-something-so-silly woman you all know today. Well, sorta. (You can pick and choose what part of this paragraph are, indeed, true and which ones are blatantly a cover-up for some deep, high-school-trauma issues.)

Picture a gaggle of girls in the spring of 1991. (And no. I don't remember how much a gaggle is.) We worked hard and furiously in the Cowboy gym learning a new routine from the legendary Varsity cheerleaders. I remember there being a TON of girls, most of which I didn't know because I hailed from the just-barely-on-the-school-boundary border. That meant I was shipped daily to K.O. Knudson Jr. High as opposed to the much more trendy, popular, cheerleader-breading Woodbury Jr. High. The day of tryouts, we were brought into the auxiliary gym in groups of 3 where we performed for some non-partial (cough, cough) judges. My white t-shirt, with the sleeves rolled up, and my slouched socks had never looked so perfect. My bangs were as arc-ed as I could get them and my permed hair was pony-tailed with a scrunchie. And I tried out so hard. I knew I wasn't the best, but I had figured my odds, and I knew there was a chance. Slim, but a chance nonetheless. And let's face it. I had God on my side. I prayed A LOT that day. I rode the bus from K.O. then walked the 1/2 mile up Viking Rd. to make that tryout on time and I danced that fight song like nobody else's business. I felt pretty ok about everything and kept reminding myself, "at least you tried out. God will bless you in your pursuit of happiness."

See, in my mind, I had calculated that coming to high school without the backing of a social network (especially since most of my Jr. High peeps were staying at K.O. for their 9th grade year), it would be necessary to work myself into the socially structured cheer squad for popularity's sake. Cuz I knew nothing much about high school other than I wanted to be well-liked and popular. I know. I was deep at 13 1/2.

After tryouts the way they handled announcements of the future team was SOOOO sensitive and sweet and kind and pre-that-cheerleader-mom-in-Texas-who-killed-the-competition (remember that?!). Which, if you missed my sarcasm, means it was SOOOO tense and terrifying and mortifying. The varsity cheerleaders lined up in front of the 40+ girls trying out who were sitting on the floor all criss-cross-apple-sauced. And then they did a little diddy/cheer/thing. Stomp-Clap-Clap, Stomp-Clap-Clap, , Stomp-Clap-Clap, Stomp-Clap-Clap, Applause and screams and cheers as the incoming freshman stood up to join the older cheersisters from the V and JV squads. So, the first Stomp-Clap-Clap was followed by a SARAH and an immediate urge by me to just jump up. In the 2.4 seconds it takes a varsity squad to call out the next couple Stomp-Clap-Claps, I had a quick vision of me decked in my fashionly orange and black high fiving all my new friends the following year. Alas, BLEEKER was called and I sighed a little. "Too much to hope," I thought," being called first. And curses for having such a popular name." A couple other names [I can tell you them if you really wanna know] were called before there was another Stomp-Clap-Clap, Stomp-Clap-Clap, . . . and you all KNOW I was dying a little bit, because SURELY this was my moment. Before I could make a complete fool out of myself, they Stomp-Clap-Clapped Sarah Tempkow onto the freshman squad and they rounded the team out with a fifth and an alternate. No third Sarah. Statistically, it was silly for me to have hoped. . .

Fast forward 19 years. My dancing queen of a daughter declares her intentions of being a middle school cheerleader and, not lying here, I was immediately washed in the emotion of not making the squad. I was very pragmatic about the whole failure thing as I walked the long walk down from the gym, past the waiting moms, to the parking lot where I waited for my mom. I battled to keep my composure as I reminded myself of what a long-stretch it would have been for me, a bonefide dork, to make the automatic upper echelons of the social strata. All those years later and I found myself immediately prepping Kenzie for the odds that she wouldn't make the team. I had many a practice convo in my head so I could help cushion Kenz's cheer fail fall easily when the bad news came [much as my mom did after she picked me up in the blue mini-van when she got off work that afternoon 1991.] LUCKILY (and purely for my sake of missing out on that moment in parenthood - which I am sure will come in other ways - do I consider it LUCKY) Kenz made the team and is living the life of a SMS flying tiger cheerleader. Rah Rah.

Since I know what the other side of being rejected from the cheer squad feels like, I am so thrilled that I, in a way, know what it's like to make the team. I'm sure it's similar to ANYTHING that someone tries out for and wants badly. However, I've come to the conclusion that I am not really living my life through my daughter and her whole cheer experience. God knew what he was doing and making the cheer squad in 1991 really wasn't for me [in many ways, I am sure.] Frankly, the whole cheer culture kinda baffles me and I have a hard time keeping up with all the people that move in and out of the popular circles. I've seen other moms who were cheerleaders themselves and are literally coaching their daughters through each nuance of the team. And that's sweet, I'm sure, for them. I can really only remind Kenz that she's supposed to actually watching the game instead of people watching . . . I don't know where she'd get that tendency from . . . I am happy for my daughter. I am happy she has found what makes her happy.

So tonight we hosted a little holiday party for the squad and they came and ate and gift-exchanged and Just-dance-3-ed. It was fun. And they were cute. My cousin, Jerolyn, whose daughter is also on the squad came to help me with set up and take down. Towards the end of the party, these cute girls were laughing and dancing and living a good life when Jer grabbed my arm and said, "They're living the dream." We both laughed since she, too, hadn't made the cheer squad she tried out for (eat your heart out 7th grade Burley Jr. High squad...) and it made me a little misty. Honestly, I want all my kids to be able to live out all their dreams, whatever they my be: cheerleader, spa-coordinator, Tony Romo replacement, ninja, or a video game junkie who gets to stay in his pajamas all day. That's a role of a mom, I think. One of the roles, at least; to be that person who celebrates all those dreams our kids may get to live. Even if the dream is cheer leading and it was our own dream unrealised.

*Post-script. I have known a lot of wonderful people in my life who are cheerleaders (because, let's face it, once a cheerleader, ALWAYS a cheerleader.) I have profound respect for them and I love them dearly. The cheerleaders from 1991 (through 1995) were my friends and I've since had other women in my life who have used their mad cheer talents to rah-rah me through some of my most difficult times in life. And I love them.

A year has come and gone. . .

2012-01-02T21:22:00.000-08:00

A BIG part of my 2011? Being part of miracles.

What is it about the new year that makes me wanna blog? As I have thought A LOT about 2012, I have come to MANY conclusions about 2011. One of them is that since I have a hard time remembering much of anything, it's a bummer I didn't blog more last year. My poor kids. 2011 will be the year we don't remember... and maybe that's good in some ways.

I have been seeing a lot of people giving the bird to 2011 (literally, have you seen the picture with the numbers, 2 - 0 - and two middle fingers making the 1 - and 1- ?) and yes, in some respects I can really understand why it's a year best moved past. 2011 has been hard for me (and I don't have anything to really complain about in comparison to some of my most nearest and dearest who have really been dealt a dose of trials), but despite the challenges, I have left 2011 feeling extremely grateful.

Now, on to 2012. If this really is the year the world comes to a screeching halt (thank you Mayan peeps), I have decided I will make the mental choice to make it a good one. And even if it comes and goes super fast (which I believe may be a little more believable than that stone Mayan calendar) I want 2012 to be a good year. So, of course, that means eliminating things that bummed me out, stressed me out, saddened me, or weighed heavily on me in 2011. At a lovely lunch a couple days ago, my insomniac friend, ElRae, was explaining her 4am musings about identifying her word for 2012. It got me thinking. I need a word. So, like every other big decision in my life, I went to facebook. I really liked my friend, Jen's, suggestion of "Manhandle" (old joke), cousin Jer's apropos "Honeybadger" suggestion, and my sister's wise idea of "Cray-cray." I thought last night I had decided on SIMPLIFY, which has A LOT of relevance in my life, but I think I have decided on CONSTRUCT.

I know, weird word, huh? CONSTRUCT. I wanna build myself this year. I wanna build a stronger family, testimony, career, future, and friendships. It's going to be big. Huge. And one of the things I decided I need to CONSTRUCT is the time for myself to be expressive and creative. Nine times out of ten, that doesn't work out for me. Either I make someone mad, or I mess something up, but I found that it feeds my soul. And my soul likes to be fat and chubby. Lately, I think it's been too skinny for my own good. We'll be crafting and writing that soul into a soft and squishy place again. Thus this blog post and maybe some others before 2012 ends. I am hoping with some STRUCTURE (part of my CONSTRUCT concept) I will carve some "me" time that will allow me to record the glorious moments in my life and those that are helping me CONSTRUCT a more refined existence, i.e. those challenges I face. [Really, most of the time I will be sharing nauseating experiences about my life and family, so I am thinking it's probably a good thing nobody is reading this blog anymore.]

And off we go. Tomorrow, the 3rd of January, starts the official back-to-reality grind which happens at the end of Winter Break. If I don't remember to write about my morning tomorrow, just know I will be thinking something like, "5am is in NO WAY constructive," but then I will get moving and be glad that I'm able to build something great this year. CHEERS Y'ALL~

Deadlines

2011-01-02T21:47:00.000-08:00

Erin, Me, cousin Jer at the family cousins' Christmas party. Who doesn't stick pantyhose on their heads when given the chance?

Ok. I have exactly 12 minutes to type another blog before I told Tyler he had to put me in bed for my 10pm curfew. The night before school starts... blech. I don't have super high expectations for sleeping and, truthfully, I am hoping we get some freak snow storm that shuts everything down tomorrow. Wishes, wishes, wishes.

But, the reality is, tomorrow I will get up at 5am and stand in a stupor at my alarm clock and think, "This is really early. This sucks," before stumbling into the bathroom to start the routine. Somewhere along the way, I will stop hating the early morning and appreciate the silence. That usually happens right before I am stressed about getting everything done that I didNOT do over Christmas break. I will not be casting the disappointment stones at my students tomorrow... then they can't gripe that I didn't grade their essays, right? Right. We'll see how that goes.

A lot of people have asked how it's been going back to work and I think the question is really just a general survey question. I don't think they really want to know the gnitty gritty (or is it knitty???) details, but you know me and how I love details... I think going back to work has been the greatest mental paradox for me. I am REALLY grateful for my specific position and the timing of my job. I KNOW the Lord had a hand in blessing me with being close to my home, with me teaching a class I had taught before [which has really helped in the confidence arena after being home for 8 years], and with knowing that our family would be okay as we transitioned into a working mom sitch-iation. I love teaching. And I love English. I really enjoy the kids (some I love, and some are REALLY tough). Regardless of all my professional passion, though, my first priority is being a good mom and wife. BUT, let's face it. There's only so many hours in the day and since God sent me with only 2 hands, a lot of things fall through the cracks. THAT has been the hardest thing for me about going back to work. I don't like when I watch things fall into the abyss of "oops, totally spaced that" or "crap, that's not gonna get cleaned/done/finished." Trying to maintain 2 full time jobs is tough, yes, but more frustrating since I just get downright tired. I can't believe, the past couple months, how weary I have felt some nights. It's kinda amazing and REALLY makes me feel like a chump for complaining so many other times when I had it pretty good.

I am reminded daily how blessed I am and while me working hasn't made us any richer (somehow my income is pretty invisible...), I find I am appreciative of my time with Tyler and the kids WAY more than I used to be. And honestly, I needed that. I suppose I should be more demonstrative of that appreciation. . . but I still get stuck doing the laundry and toilets instead.

Ope, gotta run. Times up. Again, I'll be going private here as soon as I get the chance to type in your addresses. Thanks for emailing me, those of you who wanna read. I can't wait to tell you all those details of my life that I try to skip when we pass in the hallway and you are kind enough to inquire about my life. {{Smooches}}

Resurrection?

2010-12-23T20:54:00.000-08:00

(hair courtesy of "Who-ville" day at the high school. I was one of 5 people to actually dress up. Yeah, no shame, my people!)

Holy moly! I haven't posted a blog since August. Fail. Actually, it'd be an epic fail (as the kids these days say.) It isn't that I haven't wanted to blog, I have. It's just that there's been too much to write about and not enough time to give it all justice. So, basically, you've missed a lot of garbage AND a lot of good since I didn't record it on the 'ol bloggity blog, but we'll pretend we're all on the same page and if I can remember the details later on I'll mention them... maybe.

I'm trying not to stress that my Christmas vacation is pert-near half over. Christmas Eve day tomorrow will mean I am scrambling to do all the things I have procrasti-santa'd all week. I did finally get the kids' present wrapped last night and hopefully tomorrow Christmas cards will hit the post office (only to sit there until after Christmas, right!?), but at least it'll be off my to-do list.

One of the things we had on our to-do list tonight was to clean our chapel with several other families from our ward. Now, y'all could call me a big fat liar if I told you I was super amped to go to the clean the church when I have baking to finish. Cuz, I really wasn't. I wasn't very positive and in this season of giving, I wasn't being very seasonal.

When we got to the church, we split the duties. As Tyler was taking out the trash to the outside recepticle that's enclosed in a brick fence and gate, he discovered there was a homeless man hiding out next to the trash can. Tyler was stunned a bit and the timid man kept the conversation short so Tyler'd leave. Now, if you've been in Vegas, you know we've had several days of non-stop rain and drizzle, so I'm sure this man was appreciating that the skies (at least at that point) were clear. Once Tyler got over his surprise, the man told Tyler that being in the enclosure meant he was doing better than being out in the open. I couldn't even imagine calling camping out next to a (STINKY/DIRTY!) trash can "better," but I guess perspective is important no matter what's going on in our lives, right?

Anyhow, Tyler came back to the church and nobody really knew what we should do, or how to handle the situation. Tyler went back out before we left to see if he needed anything to get through the night, to find out if he was hungry, and the man was very gentle and humble and assured Tyler he has food stamps so he wasn't hungry, and he would be okay through the night. He was wrapped in a thick comforter and Tyler surmised that he was trying to just go to sleep. Of course, by that point, I got pretty grateful that I had the opportunity to clean the church. I mean, there are places that don't have chapels to meet in each week. And I was feeling pretty spoiled with my unbaked goodies that were sitting in my house (yeah, the same goodies I was cursing since I really DO hate baking). Yeah, in my house that is warm and furnished with comfortable furniture and beds. And, of course, I was thinking about how sad and devestating homelessness is, but at Christmas? It's painful.

So, here was what was awkward about the whole thing: taking that moment to teach our kids. Because we don't know much about the random homeless man, Tyler told the kids to stay inside, which then piqued their interests. Tyler tried to explain there was homeless man out by the trash can and, I swear, you'd have thought they thought he was a zoo animal! I was a little mortified when we were leaving they wanted to go drive by to see him "living in the trash can." I mean, a live, real, human homeless man? They were all over it. To them, it's what stories are made of and they wanted to see him in the flesh . . . to do what? Stare at him? I kinda lost it on them to let them know he was just a normal man who was struggling. He didn't have a home or a bed or warm clothes to wear and that it was really, really, really sad. He was more than the "guy living in the trash can." I guess we need to teach our priviledged kids a little more perspective.

As we left the parking lot, we did what many other people who really had no clue how to make this tragic reality any better, we stopped at 7-11 and bought a hot dog and some hot chocolate to take back to him. When we returned, I asked Tyler to ask him his name. His name is Doug. I just kept thinking, this is a man with a name. I didn't want my kids calling him the "trash guy" or the "homeless man." He's someone's son/brother/maybe a father and for whatever reason, he's spending tonight sleeping in a comforter on the ground of trash enclosure. Maybe we should have done more... I dunno. Usually just dropping my change into the Salvation Army bucket suffices my "charity" to-do's for the holidays. I hope he knows we care. A hot dog and hot chocolate says that, right? I hope he knows we prayed for him by name tonight...

As we drove home, at Christmas, I thought about Michael McLean's song from "The Forgotten Carols."

Homeless, Homeless
Like the Christ child was
Homeless, Homeless
But there is hope because
He came down to earth to lead us
He vowed He'd never leave us
Homeless, Homeless
For in His love there is a home

Oh so Homeless, Homeless
Was His humble birth
He was Homeless, Homeless
And still He changed the earth
Nothing kept His heart from giving
Most of His life was living
Homeless, Homeless
He showed it's how we live,
Not where

When His homeless days on earth were done
(When His homeless days were done)
He went home to where we all came from

And He went to prepare
(He went to prepare)
A mansion for us there
(A mansion for us there)

He gave His whole life to lead us
And I know He'll never leave us
Homeless, Homeless
For in His love there is a home

(We are not Homeless, Homeless)
For in His love there is a home
(Like the Christ child was)
[repeat to end]

There is a home.

**********

On a different note.

Because I am teaching high school, and those hooligans can google like no other, I have decided it will be prudent for me to take my blog private. I don't want to presume you've been all devestated that I haven't blogged in 4 months, so if you wanna invite to my private blog party, leave a comment with your email. And then you'll have to log-on to see if I've written anything exciting... I know. Sorry for requiring effort to see my ramblings.

ScrapFest Registration up for Auction

2010-08-18T09:26:00.001-07:00

Hey ladies (and gents, if the gents are feeling particularly crafty),
There's a new blog on the block that y'all should check out. It's an auction blog (there's different auctions for each week) that supports the wonderful Crampton family's fight against Kolby's cancer [insert "booooooo cancer" sound effect here]. You should really check it out each week and bid on some of the super cool items because you score some choice stuff WHILE helping out a wonderful family with their medical expenses.

I donated a registration to the 2011 ScrapFest on this week's auction, and it'd be cool if that money went to them and YOU know you'd already be in before anyone else can even register :) It's almost like a backstage pass. Almost. So, click RIGHT HERE to go to the auction..

AND if you want to read more about Kolby's kick-butt fight against cancer, click RIGHT HERE. Really, she's like a ninja. You should become her fan :)

V-I-O-L-A-T-E-D for 15 points

2010-06-07T20:53:00.000-07:00

So, LAAAATE last night I was having trouble sleeping, so I busted out my itouch and downloaded "Words with Friends." Ya know, it's like Scrabble online. And at 1:30am after a rousing family game of Settlers of Catan and then my sister and I sit in the car working out all life's issues, that's what I do to put myself to sleep. Since I didn't know my mother-in-law's or brother-in-law's screen names (Oh! and since it was the middle of the night), I went ahead and clicked the button to create a new game with someone random.

I get all these tiles on my screen and the scrabble board when I realize I am not sure how to really play this game. I was swapping tiles and trying to figure out a word, but none of my tiles would drag onto the board when I see the little chat bubble in the top. "Oh, bonus," I think, "conversation with the stranger. I can ask him how to play." So, this was my next 3-ish minutes:

DylanThomas123456: "Hey"
me (Momma Barlow): "Hi. I'm still trying to figure this out, so be patient with me." LEAPT shows up on the board.
DylanThomas123456: "Where you from"
me: I post something. Can't remember what. "Las Vegas," I answered. "You?" I swapped tiles again because really? 2 Y's and 2 C's!?
DylanThomas123456: posts LOOSER
me: "So, if I swap tiles is that a turn?" "How do I get the tiles on the board"
Dylan Thomas123456: "Click and drag the tiles. Do you have MSN?"
me: Put some word down (can't remember now what it was), answer, "No."

OK

DylanThomas123456: "I want to see your vagina."

WHAT THE?????? ARE YOu KIDDING ME SICKO?
ugggghhhhh.
I felt SO disgusted and violated and I am sure I gasped out loud.

Quickly I went back to try and resign from the game, but I couldn't because it was the perv's turn to play. And the game continues, even if I logged off the stupid game. So, I wrote back, "Does that mean you can't make up a word?" and then added, "and no."

oh, and I was so grossed out. I mean WHO DOES THAT? Why? Oh, man. Maybe I am just too naive to think there's some decency in the world. And who's the nast who tries to pick up on people playing SCRABBLE?!!! LAME. Grody. {{shiver}}

So, since I wasn't playing his dirty game, DylanThomas123456 posts "POX"and I immediately resigned.

But here's what else bugs me, I get a notification that HE WON because I resigned the game. Dumb game will be deleted and I'll be writing a R-E-V-I-E-W.

Calling out

2010-06-05T02:17:00.000-07:00

Just another quick post.

The other day I posted on facebook that Lori Day was in great need of prayers. And several people commented that they would pray for her. That was really wonderful.

And, I kid you not, Lori is making a miraculous recovery.

Despite having had a brain aneurysm burst at the end of one of her dance classes, she never lost consciousness, survived a harrowing surgery, and is literally marching and tap dancing down the hallways with the physical therapist. Lori has taught my daughters dance for the past 9 years(and upteen thousands of other girls for 31 years.) She is a wonderful example of strength and love and patience (have YOU ever tried to teach 20 3 year olds a dance routine?!). I have admired her for as long as I know her; Kenz inadvertantly calls her "Grandma" all the time; and I have no doubt that all the prayers uttered for her benefit last week have helped her make this miraculous recovery.

SO, since that worked out so well, I hope those of you that read this will keep sweet Kolby Crampton in your prayers. Her mom, Dana, has really taken to the blogosphere like a champ and is chronicling their story on their blog, http://www.keepingkolby.blogspot.com/ . Please go to their blog and read about their fight and send them some support by a comment. Even if you don't know them, I know they appreciate the motions of love. And pray for them. I cannot comprehend a fraction of what they're going through, but man, if my prayers are being heard, it's for more good days and less bad ones for all of them. Thanks y'all.

That Age of Accountability

2010-06-05T01:40:00.000-07:00

Later today, Caylee will be baptized. She's 8 and thus deemed "accountable" in the the eyes of the Lord. And I am sitting here at 2am wondering if she's really ready for the whole process of making real choices. Real choices means asking for forgiveness when she makes the wrong ones. Wrong choices means heartache or pain or [ew!] consequences, and it's been much easier on me to think of her as my baby girl and absolve her from all that reality. I guess, up until today, that it. Real choices also mean she'll learn from her choices and start to walk her own path. As a her mom, it pretty much scares the bejeebies out of me. While I was all gung-ho for Kenzie to grow up, I think I may want to keep my Caylee Bug little for a bit longer. Like this:

Caylee announced to us tonight that she had a "most awesome, wonderful day." To end on that note is quite a feat with Caylee since she goes up and down the scale throughout, and most times ends in a tired slumped state. For weeks she's been looking forward to lunch with sweet Natalie Roach in our ward. She and Caylee have a birthday just a day apart and when Caylee pointed that out to Natalie, Natalie offered a lunch date to celebrate the occasion. It. Made. Caylee's. Month. To even steep the deal, Natalie took Caylee out to get a bona fide pedicure. At lunch Natalie spoke of a kindred spirit with Caylee [and others] who are 2nd borns. It was like she just "got" Caylee and all her passion and sensitivity. I'm really grateful to her for taking the time to make Caylee feel loved and special. Natalie will have a special place in my little girl's heart forever. And boy oh boy are her toes darling.

Caylee has always been full of fire and spit. She's a lover and a fighter, a leader AND a follower. As a baby, Caylee was hard. [Honestly, her being a baby and Brevin being a baby are all kind of a blur and I don't remember it being THAT bad, but others (like Tyler) assure me she was a toughie.] Even now I have a hard time with her stubborn streak and the range of emotions. While I joke about her being bipolar, I am proud of the way she has learned to identify what the real issue is. She can tell us if her incoherent ranting and raving is because she's tired, or because she needs some attention, or because she's frustrated. Of all my kids, I'd say Caylee's emotions are right on her sleeve. Because of that, she's also my most generous of spirit. When Caylee greets you with happiness, it's genuine. When she loves, she gives it all to you. I'm blessed to see her in action with other people.

As I think about how quickly the time has passed since she was born, I really marvel at the way she has grown into a little lady. She loves all things girl, but doesn't fuss about it as much as her older sister. Before I know it she'll be going into Young Women, starting high school, dating and graduating. All Caylee has really ever wanted was to grow up to be a mom. I NEVER realized that could be an be-all-end-all ambition as a little girl, and I thank Tyler for instilling that honor in my girls. I push my girls to dream up a college degree they want and Tyler reminds them there'd be nothing to make him prouder than if one day (when they're in their 30s) they were good moms. Who knows where her life will take her, but I have NO DOUBT she'll keep us holding our breath and crossing our fingers as we follow her. And I am sure she'll be dancing a long the way, because as she told Natalie today at lunch, "I think Kenzie is a better singer, but I got the moves."

I just love this little girl. She gets the idea of family and solidarity and commitment to each other like none of my other kids. She'd just assume play with her cousins and siblings than any of her friends from church or school. I already appreciate Caylee's loyalty and passion. I think that will bring her so many blessings in her life.

So, yeah. In a few hours I'll be all a hoot and a fluff trying to make sure I've got the house all cleaned and everyone will enjoy the dinner after her baptism. We'll talk about what it means to be accountable and then she'll take her dad's hand and be taken into the waters of baptism. I feel a great happiness that she'd want to eximplify the Savior in this way and that she is ready to commit to being a member of our church. I feel the responsibility on my shoulders. It's time for me to be accountable too. I sure hope I've taught her enough so far.

Momentum

2010-06-01T23:05:00.000-07:00

The story for today is about how I had Caylee's thermos of 4 week old mashed potatoes literally explode all over me and my kitchen when I pried it open to clean it. I couldn't, for the life of me, figure why the thermos wasn't opening that easily, but a few short seconds later and covered with vomit-smelling curds, I realized there was probably some serious gas built into that small thermos to have it explode all over the room. As I stood there totally stunned, I thought how if I were a stellar mom I could swiftly convert that into a science lesson for my stay at home boys, or I should grab my camera to document the nastiness, er, I mean beauty of being a SAHM, BUT instead I totally made gagging noises while my boys whined about the stench. Have I explained enough that it EXPLODED? Like, BAM? or BOOM? It was crazy. I'd call it the highlight, but that wouldn't be fair to my girls' dance recitals that came AFTER I washed the putrid sludge off my clothes, face, walls, cupboards, furniture, counters . . . seriously it sprayed everywhere. UGH. It was nast. Trust me. {{shiver.}}

So, since I have been all up in my blog-ness the past few days, I figured I should continue to dump my swirling thoughts here and there. Otherwise they swirl out of my mind and I have NO clue what to write when I sit down and look at my computer. And when I don't have anything to write about I then end up on facebook or watching a Netflix documentary (it's kinda my new addiction). Neither of those options are interesting to my posterity or the world wide internet (and by that I mean the very few of you who actually still read this blog. Oh, as an extra bonus for those of you that do read this and want to read something more interesting AND bizarro, click on this link -->This is a crazy story)

But since I mentioned you who do read my blog. I like knowing someone out there is reading, however, I don't really mind if you don't make comments. Don't get me wrong, I like comments and it's nice to know something struck your fancy enough that you'd want to give me a LOL or even a FLOL (fake LOL), or comment your thoughts on my thoughts. It's kinda like we're having a passerby conversation, and you know me. I just love any kind of a conversation. BUT, I am also a really poor commentor. I read several blogs and have far too many to confess linked to my google reader, but rarely do I actually branch to their real site to leave a comment. So, I am not throwing any lack-o-comment stones or anything. In fact, I don't really know where I am going with all this, but basically, my lack of commenting on others' blogs does not mean I am giving their blogs the 'ol high school hallway cold shoulder or anything, it's just that I am really focused on zoning out and being lazy. Oh bother. Why am I blogging this?

BUT since I mentioned blogs, let me share a little somethin' somethin' with y'all. There is a wonderful family in our Las Vegas Warm Springs LDS stake named the Cramptons. I first came to love them when I was serving in the stake young women presidency and their cute daughter, Kylie, was one of the young women that we got to work with (for youth conferences, camp, dances, etc.) and Dana (Kylie's mom) was serving as one of the ward's young women presidents within the stake. Any conversation with Kylie and/or Dana was a great one in my book and they oozed love and fun and goodness. Dana is married to John and when I say he's a super-star seminary teacher I am not just trying to make them sound even more wonderful than they really are (they just really are THAT wonderful.) John has taught for several years and I personally know of kids who would refuse to register for seminary unless they could be in Bro. Crampton's class. Now, for as long as I have known the Cramptons, Kylie and I have been close, [She's a doll and totally married now and having a baby boy in 9 short weeks and has even started a blog that you need to go read because now the secret's out about how much I love her!] but Kylie is just the innards of a delish Crampton girl sandwich. Her older sister Kristie and little sister Kolby have always felt, to me, completely familiar and comfortable from the first day I met them. Example: I happen to stop by the stake center to drop something off the day Kristie was being released at the stake center from her mission, and I was totally gushing about how excited I was for her. We'd never met and she was super sweet and kind and probably totally overwhelmed at the spaz who was all up in her business. And Kolby, well, I've always known Kolby's every young woman move since she turned 12 and was the new Beehive on the block. ANYWAY. I love their guts. The whole lot of them and they are super cool. If this paragraph hasn't convinced you, you'll have to just take my word for it.

So, a couple Saturdays ago I found out some very sad news. Sweet Kolby had been officially diagnosed with non-hodgkins lymphoma. I knew she'd been sick and had fb chatted with Kylie earlier in the week about what tests were being run, etc., but the news of Kolby's cancer left me feeling very sad and humbled and emotional and helpless. Pretty deep for just an outside friend, huh?! I can't even imagine the depths of emotions the entire Crampton family and their close friends were experiencing. Anyhow, I just prayed and thought all day long about the family and Kolby and what, if anything, I could do to help. I chatted with her YW president and asked her to just let me know if anything came up that I could help with, etc. Later that Saturday afternoon I went to the temple. Of course, the family was on my mind a lot and I was very overcome with emotions throughout the whole session [just a whole bunch of stuff going on, not just them.] I was praying very intently for the inspiration to come about what I could do for a family who has had such a positive influence in my own life and clear as a bell, I thought, "I should start Kolby a blog. She can tell her stories and they can write it all down for posterity and then people will know how's she's doing without completely invading their lives..." and then I began to think about how ABSURD that line of thought was, "Really Lord? THAT's what I get? A blog is my answer?!" 1) I wasn't THAT close with the family. 2) Sure, I love the blogosphere, but I'm not sure everyone else has my same testimony of it all 3) How in the world would THAT come up in conversation. It was just a wacko thought and I hestitated to share it with Tyler on the way home. However, when I did, he didn't poo poo it or anything. I figured then that I'd just have to see if it ever came up with the Cramptons; then I'd offer.

The next day, Sunday, I knew I wanted to visit Kolby. She was still in the hospital finishing up some tests in preparation for her chemo, and so I snagged my bestie Barb and we met Kylie and the other Cramptons up at Sunrise hospital for a liesurely visit. Now. It's pretty much without hesitancy that I tell y'all what a rockstar Kolby is. Beyond her physical darling-ness and serious cute-batooty-ness, she has a steely resolve and strength I have hardly ever seen in someone so young. It was wonderful (for me) to see two girls (Danielle Richards and Becca Mohler) there chatting with Kolby, Kristie, and her folks. On our way up we passed the Dows and Natalie Roach, friends from the stake and it made me realize even more the love that we are all blessed to share with one another. Kolby was wearing a cute "Slam Dunk Cancer" shirt that she had from a school charity event and I was not surprised she had that in her cache of stylish clothes. I told her she ALWAYS knew how to dress for the occasion. And then we all visited. I talked mostly with Dana (and man, what an inspiration are the parents of a daugher THAT wonderful, right) and they were all laughing and in great spirits. And of course, they're going to fight that cancer. Pretty much the plan is to kick it's butt. As I was talking with Dana, the conversation came so easily to me talking to her about a blog. It was easier than buttering a warm muffin. I thought it would be so awkward and weird, but Dana was interested and easy about it. So, I offered to set one up for Kolby. And I did. Last night I went to their house and we visited. I showed Kolby and Dana the ins and outs of the basic blog and I am sure before I know it, Dana will be the blog extordinaire. They were excited. I felt grateful. I think they could use all the love and support they can get, whether they know who's supporting them or not. So, I hope you all will click HERE and check out their blog. (P.S. I know MANY of you have way cuter blogs. Pa-lease offer to help Dana be more savvy. My knowledge is small in that arena, but she's super anxious to learn more and make it super cool.)

Furthermore, this week, we found out that my girls' dance teacher, Lori Day had a brain aneurysm. In dance class last Thursday. But a SERIOUS miracle and tons of prayer, I believe, she survived surgery and is recovering beyond expectations. Lori's daughter, Natalie, took over tonight for the girls' dance show and it was MARVELOUS. Tomorrow will be another recital, and Lori will continue to heal. It just really puts my whole life into perspective when I think about Lori shuffle stepping one minute and being life flighted to second hospital the next. Or thinking about Kolby cheering at football games in the fall and now self-talking herself into taking all her meds every day. I am blessed. I am grateful for those blessings. And to witness tender mercies on a regular basis makes me know how loved I am by God.

No filter

2010-05-27T09:20:00.000-07:00

This morning as I am getting my gym clothes on, Caylee says, "Good Mom. Go work out that belly of yours."

Indignantly I reply, "Where d'you think I got this belly, Caylee?"

Her response, "Food!"

So I must correct her, "OR BIRTHING YOU AND YOUR SIBLINGS!"

***Tyler during this whole exchange? Giggling while brushing his teeth.

What? Where'd May go!

2010-05-26T21:42:00.000-07:00

Tonight I stopped by a friend's house to pay my entrance into her Summer Scrapbook Challenge contest. Since I rarely have cash on me, I had to bust out the ancient checkbook and write it out by hand and everything. I know, poor me, right?! Nah, but in doing so, I had to mentally check into the date. Today is May 26. May freakin 26. How is time flying by SO fast?

And yes. I know that when I ask questions like that, it does indeed prove that time is going by because that's what old people say, (old, creaky voice) "Where'd the time go?"

I had honestly thought that I'd be totally on the ball and call my visiting teaching ladies tomorrow, because I didn't want to wait til the end of the month. Uh, guess I blew that since there are only 5 more days in the month and 3 of them are a long weekend. I stink at visiting teaching, which is really too bad, because I have THE best partner and ladies to visit teach AND *Sigh* I can't bake, so it's just an all-around bad scenario.

What really perplexes me is how I can get so little physically accomplished in a day where I am completely busy and the day seems so long, yet it all goes so fast. About a month ago I decided we were going to surrender the toy room, seperate my girls into their own rooms, de-junk the garage, and get rid of the crib so all three boys could be in one room. {Yes, I know, my brother-in-law already pointed out the unfairness of the situation, "So, each of the girls get their own room and the boys all 3 have to share one? Sounds fair." While my sister pointed out the obvious, "They're just going to get messier and stinkier, so leave them all in one room."} Part of all that rearranging was moving all the junk/clutter/treasures into the middle of our living room so I could "go through" it and trash/D.I./re-organize it all before finding a new home for it. It was a beautiful plan, and for the most part, I can claim success in the rearranging and the garage. However, my living room has two long church tables set up and stuff piled all over it. And by stuff I mean old mission letters from Tyler, our school memorabilia, fly-tying stuff, scrapbook/craft goodies amongst so many other unfinished-totally-good-intentions gems. Blech. It has started to goad me when I walk into the room. "Hey Sarah! Look at all this stuff you hoard and can't part with, yet can't muster the strength to toss or pack back away. mwuuuaaaahhhhahahaha!" Too, there's nothing like having people walk into my modge-podge front room and feel like I need to explain the inner garage sale look I have oh-so-deftly designed for our home. Maybe if time stood still I could take care of all it. Maybe.

p.s. I did manage to go through 3 years of magazine subscriptions and pull out the things that I wanted to be able to refer back to in upcoming years . . . so, that is one miniscule pile pulled off the tables. And here's the after product of the boys' room. I think my other pictures are all still on my camera(s).

And to close this totally random (and yes, probably uncool post) here's another way I know time is slipping through my fingers. Tyler just got home from an Elder's Quorum party (which, is also what they call, in our ward, getting together to watch the basketball game and ultimate fighting for 2 hours on a Wednesday night) and was telling me that his youngest [and arguably the most hip] brother, Brandon, was ordering him some kind of knock-off fashion jean. But Tyler couldn't remember the name of them. "Jesus jeans?" he tried. I had NOT heard of those. "Wait, maybe they're called 'Lord' brand or something?" Still hadn't heard of it. And it was then I realized neither of us are young, hip, and savvy enough to know what to even offer as the real name. He finally did remember it was TRUE RELIGION jeans, but you'd think, if we weren't so out of touch, we'd have known that right off the bat. And does that ruin someone's cool factor if they wear knock off jeans? Time will tell, I s'pose.

Where You been all my life. . . or at least the past couple months?

2010-04-23T15:19:00.000-07:00

Rewind a couple years ago and envision me HUGE pregnant with Briggs. The Anthem stake (neighboring church zone) was putting on a play called Savior of the World and my high school choir teacher was directing the choir, so I figured there wasn't a better way to gestate than to go sit in an orchestra pit for a couple weeks and sing pretty songs. There were some very lovely people down in the hole and some super talented musicians and by the time it was all said and done, I had checked off another month of my pregnancy.

My kids came to visit rehearsals and peered down at me in the alto section and then watched snatches of the show. Mackenzie, especially, was taken by the whole process and I told her (flippantly) that she could audition the next year. BUT that was last year and we would have missed the way fun Coral Pink trip with the Mohler family, so I was pretty much a liar to my daughter and told her THIS year would be the year for auditions. Annnd, of course, she remembered that was deal, so she tried out.

There are only a couple speaking parts for young girls and Kenzie got a call back with about 15 other pre-teen girls. I figured since adults had to be with the kids, I'd audition for an angel role (which ended up to be fabulously embarrassing and humiliating and a whole 'nother post all together. But does anyone even want to hear that story?). Basically, the night of postings I was a nervous wreck for Kenzie trying to figure how I'd break bad news vs. how we'd properly celebrate good news. [Tyler totally asked for her first autograph when we got the official word she'd been cast as Rebekah . . . sweet daddy!]

So, the past couple months we've been to lots of rehearsals, me and Kenz, and many nights it's been good just to go and sit, waiting for my bit parts (because, yeah, I got pulled onto stage for a couple scenes . . . it was a real pull, too. You know me and the spotlight . . . just dug my heels in ;)) Here's us on the way to our first rehearsal:

The whole experience has been SUPER interesting to me. I've always admired show of the stage, but had NO clue what was involved with "blocking" and preparing a show. One of the most mind boggling aspects is the freakin' LINES and LINES and LINES the actors and actresses memorize. Really. Mad props to them for that work, because not only can they sing and move in the right spots on stage and emote and all that jazz, but they do it well.

First we had rehearsals at a warehouse in Green Valley and then we moved to the Henderson Pavilion (by the multi-gen) to rehearse.

Kenzie's scene is in Act II (she's an angel with me in Act I . . . somewhere in this there's a joke about her calling herself a "perfect angel," but it'd take too long to explain without her sounding completely conceited.)

There's been a lot of ongoing conversation about Savior of the World, especially since it's the 3rd year the show's been produced. There's a lot of angles to look at the play, but I have REALLY learned to appreciate a lot of the show's messages. Tyler said one night (and it kinda hurt my feelings, but it also might be the case), "Savior of the World is only good for the people who are actually IN the show." Because, here's the deal. It's about Christ's birth and then about his resurrection and EVERYONE knows that story (for the most part) and the rest of it's just theatrical interpretations and a lot of blah de blah blah blah with some songs in between. What I've noticed is I have REALLY gotten a lot out of the blah de blah blah blah parts.

Here's a one of my favorite messages: The show starts with the story of Elizabeth and Zacharias (John the Baptist's parents) and there's a song that has the line, "I'll give God forever and then give one day more." Both of them are singing about their particular trial in life [not having children] and it's made me think about my expectations for God's timing. Really, I shouldn't HAVE expectations, but faith. If I trust in HIM, I will be provided for, EVEN when I feel like I've had "enough" faith. It's not like God doesn't know my heart. He does. And I believe whole heartedly that he cares. He wants me to be happy, I believe, and so the trials I face aren't to make me weaker or sadder or less than. It's the continuing faith that will bring me solace through those trials, and my opportunity to continue the faith for 'one day more.' I tend to be a little more impatient with it all. I want Tyler's job to be firm and secure once again without so much effort and so little payback. Have I felt right on the brink a few times of feeling like the past several months have taken 'forever?' Yes. BUT, I can give one day more. I am pressing forward with the faith that the blessings and joys I will have will be equal to that of childless years being blessed with an infant son. (However, I do feel like I should clarify, the Lord's blessing I seek is not in the form of a baby boy. Thanks. I'm set on that. We'll be all good with something a little more appropote to our fam and our trials.)

Here's a couple more pictures of dress rehearsal (mostly of Kenzie's scene):

So, all the rehearsals and practices and conversations about Savior of the World will come to a climax tonight for opening night. IF you'd like to come and watch me and Mackenzie and hear some pretty good talent, go to the website HERE and purchase tickets for $5.00 or you can come sit on the grass for free. The show runs tonight and tomorrow and then next Tuesday through Saturday. I do, too, want to thank (blogly, which is pretty publicly, for all the support that Tyler has given to Mackenzie [and me] while we've been rehearsing. Also part of our entourage has been Grandpa Bruce who's filled in many a nights of babysitting while Mackenzie and I rehearse and Tyler's busy doing church stuff or recovering from his shoulder surgery. It's an inordinate amount of time to be part of a production like this and the families of those on stage really are unsung stars of the whole experience.

P.S. There's no real program for the play with actors' names or anything, so know that my mother-in-law, Dodie, is in the choir (as well as several friends of mine) and a couple friends (holla Jeannie and Shannon) are in the orchestra. Kenz is an angel throughout and in Act II's "apple scene" with some of the apostles. I am making brief appearances here and there as a shopping townsperson, a wedding walker, Tirzah (an Alleluia girl in Act II) and an angel in between. We'll be breakin' a leg, so, again, please come. Let me know if you're coming because you know I'd love to visit with you :)

Spring Break

2010-03-30T09:00:00.000-07:00

Why is it that MY Spring Break seriously looks like this:
Clean bathroom cupboards and drawers
Organize coat closet
Scrub kitchen drawers and cupboards
Clean car
Text tball parents about practice
Finish 4th yr. prep for meetings/get out invites
Laundry
Yard work
Shift wardrobes
Install attic access in garage/rearrange garage
Lunch out without kids
Clean grout
Recaulk shower and kids' tub

And my kids' list looks like this:
Playdate
Sleepover
Library
McDonalds
Movies
Playdate
No cleaning
Swimming (what?!)
Play with cousins
Sleepover

And my husbands' looks like this:
Work
Therapy
Eat
Sleep
Sex

hmmmmm.

The open-backed medical gown

2010-03-22T10:11:00.000-07:00

It's getting hot in here,
So take off all your clothes . . . and look to the left and cough.
Because now more of you can go get annual check-ups as part of your government-semi-mandated insurance coverage! :)

Ok. So, I have a total personal commentary blog about the health care debate, but I am going to post this one JUST in as simple terms as possible for my sister-in-law, Stacy, a self-proclaimed "not really into the political thing" person, for now, and then post my thoughts afterward. I'm going to type this like I was talking with Stacy.

Alright. According to the Congressional Budget Office, the numbers guys, there are approximately 32 million people living in America without health insurance (that's a little more than 10% of our population). With this new bill 25 million people will be required, by law, to carry some sort of minimal health insurance by the year 2014. By 2016, if you have elected to NOT have medical insurance, you will be fined ($2,085 or no more than 2.5% of your household income as your family's fee.) It's very similar to the idea of auto insurance. The money that the younger, healthier, haven't-really-needed-it-and-never-wanted-to-pay-for-it-unless-I-have-to-and-now-I-have-to generation of medical insured will help offset the costs for those who, under this new bill, CANNOT be denied health insurance because of pre-existing conditions, amongst other things.

So, out of those 25 million people who HAVE to have medical insurance, 19 MILLION of them will qualify for government subsidies (or financial aid). They figure whether you need a subsidy based on your family size and income (similar to how they figure your taxes.) If you make less money, you get more of a subsidy to help pay for your health insurance. If you make more money, you will get less of a subsidy. It's kinda like a sliding scale. As your income goes up, your help from the government to cover your medical insurance goes down. Now, if you make a bunch of money (over $250,000/year per couple) or are collecting interest and dividends on monies you have, you will pay more taxes on that sitting money AND you will have to pay more for Medicare (Part A [the hospital Medicare]). That's one reason people don't like the plan. If they make more money, they are definitely paying more money into the system for those who DON't make as much money.

The extra taxes and cutting of their Medicare for the wealthy, along with a bunch of other taxes and fees that have been enacted (i.e., new tax on expensive health insurance plans, drug manufacturers, insurance companies, and other smaller fee collections [like a 10% increase on indoor tanning tax. . . lol]) AND government monies that have been cut (like the Medicare Advantage, Home Health cuts, and certain payments to hospitals) will be where they get some of the monies they need to get this health care plan moving. IF you work full time for a company (that is over 50 employees) they must provide health insurance to you. If they don't they will be fined and if they do, but it's not enough and you qualify for a subsidy, then they have to pay into the government system $2000.00/employee for the year (first 30 employees they don't have to pay into the government system, but every full time employee after those 30, it's $2000 bucks into the system.) If they DO pay for some insurance, but it's more than 8% but less than 9.8%, this new bill would require businesses to give their employees insurance vouchers so they could go out into the marketplace to get their own insurance.

OK. SO. The marketplace is probably one of the more radical ideas of this whole concept. Shopping for medical insurance will take place in state-run EXCHANGES where individuals can shop for their family, and become part of a group (kinda like a co-op) that gets a better rate. If I understand right, it's how most of the government officials have gotten their insurance, because they have banded together and made their own bigger group. So, if you're self-employeed, or not making a ton of money, or work for a company with less than 50 employees, you can take your employer voucher or your government subsidy and check out the plans in the exchange and opt for a plan. At least a minimal plan, but each state will have 4 levels to choose from. (Bronze, Silver, Gold, Platinum). The insurance companies are now (well, in 2014) to allow the same rates for people inside a plan and for outside a plan and all plans must be "in the interest" of the people. The theory is this bill will inject competition into the medical insurance field, so even the average guy who's been paying for his own insurance can get a better deal on the exchange. The bill also expands the coverage of Medicaid so they can cover more people in the government's program if it's necessary. ALL of the subsidies and appeals about qualification as well as oversight of the state exchanges will be part of the Department of Health and Human Services. It's already a government department, they just got a whole bunch more responsibilities in their laps.

So, when is all this going to happen? Like, SHAZAM? No. The bill was passed by the House, and now the Senate and the House will go back and forth working out the terms. Plus, there's 2 more elections before it's supposed to go into action. One of the reasons people have been upset that this was being "pushed" through was because there's a Democratic majority and so, the chances of it passing were REALLY good, especially since, in these times, most all major decisions are decided by party lines [which I will get more into when I have my say on the next post.] Another reason for people getting more upset is that they're mandating that we HAVE to have insurance . . . [again, later I can talk about that.] There has been some issues (quite a lot, actually) about this new bill allowing money from the federal government to be used to fund abortions. It's one of the reasons why they weren't sure the bill would pass because several of the Democrat representatives wouldn't vote for it UNTIL President Obama signed an executive order specifically stating that no federal monies would be used to fund abortions. What we have now is that there canNOT be any lifetime caps OR annual caps on existing health coverage. SO, if you get really sick, you can't be kicked off your insurance for using up too much money. Children cannot be excluded from insurance coverage for pre-existing conditions and can stay on their parents insurance until they're 26, guaranteed by this bill. Until the "exchange" program is available (in 2014) there will be a temporary "high risk" National plan that's available for some, and a credit available to senior who fell into the "gap" of the Medicare prescription plans. Also, effective immediately, businesses that already offer insurance to their employees will recieve tax credits of up to 50% of their premium costs (that's a big plus to businesses.)

Is this the answer? I do not think it's the complete answer. I can see where there is a lot of wiggle room for the plan to work one way for the good of the people and another for the tighter control by government . . . but that gets all too personally motivated for me, to keep it simple, so I will have to talk about that next.

Hope this helps, Stac.

Clover Clever

2010-03-17T10:10:00.000-07:00

I know, right! SHE BLOGS . . . and it's a lousy hair do blog. However, those hairdo's are NOT lousy (nor are the African-ish, as my friend Jennie called them . . . she's just jealous of my mad hair-do skills!) and were completely inspired by my friend Rachel Burnham who is REALLY amazing with the art of doing hair. Really, check out her blog if you're looking to be inspired. These four-leaf clovers (that's the visual you should be getting here, peeps!) took us a bit to complete this morning and once Caylee bemoaned not having her hair all did like Kenzie's, I succombed to the pressure (uh, ok, the thought of both my girls being fawned over for their cuteness is what REALLY got me) and we were a whopping ten minutes late for school. It was a sacrifice considering our stellar on-time record [honestly, no sarcasm in that . . . especially compared to last year], but both girls were happy. Brevin really got the shaft, though. He didn't think his teacher would care that it was his mom's fault because she was doing fancy hair do's on his sisters. Oh well. Get used to it now, buddy.

So, clearly I have not blogged too much. I have had a ton of things to blog about and have REALLY thought of some doosies when I am driving around, but, frankly, when I have time to sit on the computer, I usually watch some dumb reality show on hulu that I have missed since we got rid of the DVR. I know. I am a deep and meaningful person who is making a difference in society. Instead of sharing pearls of wisdom, I am busy catching up on the Real Housewives of New York. I mean, really, do you want to read about my diatribe on the beauty of a car blinker OR know that I am watching the ladies of New York scamper about the Hamptons. I'm sure you understand. In fact, I imagine many of you aren't even READING this anymore because you've gone to hulu.com to watch an episode or 2. ;)

So, I will let you be. Enjoy your St. Patty's day ladies, gents, and leprauchans!

Re-directing Your Course

2010-01-10T17:16:00.000-08:00

So, I am sure the 7 of you that still check in on my blog came to find posts of New Year's resolutions, holiday happenings, or funny musings on the life o the Barlows. Sorry to say this post is probably neither, but I do have something to share.

I was a freshman at Chaparral High School in 1991 and my best friend Tiffany Davison and I had lockers a few rows apart from each other on the upper deck of the English/History Hall. It was a prime location (which we probably didn't fully appreciate at the time), but we could easily meet around there and pass notes between class and do a little upper classmen gawking as they walked by to their respective "older" Government or Composition classes. Many a male Cowboy we swooned over from our orange-fenced perch there. It's where I was first introduced to a tall red-head kid named John Abbott. Tiff had a crush on him for a second, but at that stage of soaking-it-all in, I was placing names with faces like crazy.

And that was pretty much the beginning of my introduction to the Abbott family. The Abbotts lived in our stake and as my world expanded in high school, I realized John Abbott had a really big family and wonderful parents. Garth Abbott, his dad, was gregarious and fun and loving and LOVED his family. Sister Abbott, was SO kind and jovial and loving and busy (again, big family!) Those are my impressions and remembrances of my interactions with the two of them. They were one of the couples of periphery influence on me. They were ALWAYS a good example to me. Later in high school, my senior year boyfriend was best friends with another Abbott boy, Jason, who was a good friend to me and my sister. Many a memory I have with Jason, and his good-natured, fun-loving self is also a testament to his parents' love and example, I think.

Over Christmas break, I got word that Garth was diagnosed with a really aggressive form of male breast cancer and the prognosis was bleak. The Abbott family's scope of influence has been wide and abundently good, and before long, their daughter-in-law (Rachelle, who interestingly enough, I got to know a little bit as our paths would cross as new Clark County English teachers and at the office of the OB/GYN while we were always pregnant at the same time together) began a fund-raising blog to help raise funds to start Garth on the much-needed chemotherapy that he needs.

See, (and this is the part, where, since it's my blog, I can speak freely) Garth Abbott has no health insurance. Because of that, they won't treat him. In THIS country??? Really? Well, yeah. [I'll leave it at that.] Rachelle speaks about this issue on her blog (as well as a really good description of Garth's situation) and it's summed up with he will not receive treatment until they can cash pay some of his expensive treatments. Since I can relate with the don't-really-have-that-kind-of-money-sitting-around predicament, I have been really touched at the outpouring of support and auction items up for bid (at last count I saw there was almost 100). This auction is short and it's really all about helping Garth and his family. And I can relate with that too. Who wouldn't want to help a brother, dad, son, husband, grandpa?

I have added a ScrapFest registration to the auction and hope that will be a small help. And I have made a bid on a Valentine's basket (because y'all know I'm not a good baker!), but there is a great need for a lot more traffic onto the blog. I'm hoping some of you who read this and can, will go pay a visit and find something that strikes your fancy. Then bid, or donate to the bank account. EVERY bit will help.

Here's your next stop on the internet: HELP SAVE GARTH ABBOTT!!!

Thanks peeps . . . this is what makes the internet such a blessing!

Lucky 13

2009-12-21T10:00:00.000-08:00

Right before Christmas, on December 21st, Tyler and I celebrated being married for 13 years. It was a pretty simple "celebration" of him taking the kids to the dollar store for family night and my Christmas shopping (oh yeah, this year I scored some pink ankle socks, gum, and a black Bratz doll pez dispenser) and I stayed home and wrapped some presents for under the tree. We did go to dinner over the weekend, and in we've-so-been-married-for-long-enough-not-to-make-a-big-fuss fashion, we decided the dinner at Cheesecake factory with our friends would serve as our "anniversary dinner" after the fact. We didn't really exchange cards or anything fancy this year, just a couple texts throughout the day, and it was just right for me. Nice. Sweet. Simple.

I love being married to Tyler. The longer we get married, the more co-dependent I become on him, which says a lot for an independent person. I miss him when he's not home (even day-to-day) and it makes my life just feel right when he's around. We've definitely been working out the normal marital kinks over the past 13 years, and I imagine we'll work out a few more bumps the next few years (for example, how to get him to take a normal picture without making a silly face). I am glad that fateful summer of 1996 we decided that dating for fun just wasn't enough and that we should get married. We were young. We were dumb (even though we totally thought we had it worked out, we had no clue!!!) But we were in love and we knew we had a great chance to marry for eternity and build a great family.

Now, 5 kids later, we are in the midst of that great family. I always knew Tyler would be a great dad, and I have a hard time seperating his dad-ways from my strong affection for him. I feel very blessed to learn from him and to strive to follow his example. You know, the example of not blowing his mind in frustration with the kids. He's good at that. Me? Not so much. The kids all love to do stuff with him and I appreciate so much that he takes time to be with them when he has so many other things vying for his time.

I guess, when looking back, I want to remember this 13th year as a good time. Tyler makes me laugh and I've been able to crack a few funnies here and there. We have done some great things together and we have a great hope for our future. Being married definitely takes patience on both our parts, and I nag him far too much (still waiting for a constantly empty garbage can), and he lets his snarky side show when we are having "discussions." Under all that, though, I love him and can't imagine my life without him.

13 things to remember about "us" right now.

1. Our favorite place to eat our together is Viva Mercados

2. Tyler falls asleep nearly every time I make him go to the movies, but since we rarely agree on what to see, he lets me go often with my Mom and girlfriends without complaint. I complain when he rents his movies to watch at home.

3. At night, I play on facebook and he peruses youtube from his itouch

4. He serves as the Young Men's President in our ward and I am in nursery

5. Our favorite show to watch on TV together is "The Office"

6. While Tyler prefers to go camping, I prefer to go shopping (both are expensive, don't let him tell you otherwise)

7. He wears Dirty English cologne and Curve and I wear Victoria Beckham's perfume and White Diamonds

8. Tyler prefers to shop at Perry Ellis and I get my duds at Target usually

9. For his past times, Tyler likes to go fishing and he plays weekly basketball and softball. I enjoy lunch dates and girls' nights with my friends, reading, and scrapbooking.

10. Tyler now claims he's a Libertarian. I am still a Democrat.

11. Tyler's in charge of all the yardwork. I am in charge of all the housework. We both dislike our charges.

12. Tyler naps on the couch. I nap on our bed.

13. Our favorite thing to do together is go on dates . . . especially away, no-kid ones.

12 Days of Christmas all for ME!

2009-12-13T21:50:00.000-08:00

Warning: This post may seem as self-indulgent as it really is . . . proceed with caution ;)

If EVER anyone calls me before 8am on a Sunday morning, I am ROYALLY irritated. Who does something like that? This morning, I was that person. I called my parents' home and they, still recovering from my dad's rockin' faculty Christmas party the night before, were still asleep. I didn't leave a message. My mom called right back, all bleary-sounding and cozied in her bed (I'm sure.) To add insult to injury, I asked her for a favor. To add salt to the injury (which is like a wound), it was to babysit 4 of my kids this morning while we went to hear Tyler's folks' speak in their ward's sacrament meeting.

Why share so much background? Pretty much, Mom and Pops deserve a shout out (and Uncle Mike, who apparently heard EVERY word the kids spoke while he was trying to sleep in) because they watched our kids this a.m. and THAT deserves an intro. BUT, another reason is to explain this little idea I had for myself during my father-in-law's thoughts. Today is December 13th. That leaves 12 more days until Christmas and I need to do a "12 days of Christmas." However, I decided, since this year we can't do a secret Santa-y one and since I'm just not as well-connected as Andy (from The Office), I was going to make it a personal mission to do something that would allow me the opportunity to FEEL more, to better BE, to more easily DO the Christmas Spirit. I'm not exactly sure WHAT I am going to do each day; I think I will make that a conscious matter of prayer. Mostly my good, sweet friends and family and even my neighbors that I don't really know are on my mind, so I'd like to include them in my own little celebration . . . somehow.

This is a weird year for me, Christmas-wise. I haven't been able to "want" anything for a bit, so the idea of coming up with a list seems kind of foreign and selfish. However, I decided this morning, in that 9am sacrament meeting, that I do want to feel more of the Christmas Spirit. We've eliminated a lot of our hustle and bustle this season (by complete happenstance, not by design) and I have found more quiet time a blessing, unnerving, but in a good way . . . I think.

Anyhow, for the first day of Christmas, I wanted to take time to appreciate my testimony and the opportunity I have to be a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I'm grateful for my faith and my relationship with my Heavenly Father and my Savior. Family is such an important aspect of my mortal life, that it just feels right when I broaden those ideas and feelings to an eternal nature. I know, even when (rather, ESPECIALLY when) I struggle, have burdens, or feel low that God cares about me. He does. He hasn't forsaken me because we had to turn off our cable. He sees what our family experiences and goes through and He wants it to be good for us. Further, I believe my elder brother, Jesus Christ, KNOWS how I feel (not that I think he cares that He misses watching Project Runway, but He cares for me and that it makes me a teensy bit sad); that He can relate to me on a level nobody else can. And THAT's who I want to have the strongest relationship with; for that very reason. Today, for our church service at 1pm, Tyler and I took shifts since Brock stayed home sick from church. One of the speakers, a recently returned missionary, talked about having a complete love for our Savior, a love beyond any other relationship we have, and I so appreciated that thought. I thought of all the different relationships I have (wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, etc.) and how they would be so incomplete without the Savior's atonement and without His example.

Anyhow . . . THAT knowledge is precious to me. THAT relationship I have has been confirmed in my life in really sad moments AND in really glad ones too. The whole reason we celebrate this season is BECAUSE we have a Savior, not because we have Santa Claus or ward parties or goody plates on our doorsteps (however, THOSE goody plates and Christmas cards [shameless plug for how much I adore fun holiday mail] are a really great part of the season for me . . . it's like friends and sweets and keeping touch and love and sweets all in one, you know.) I plan on making sure I remember all that this year. I'm going to push past my pride and my bad attitude and REALLY enjoy the next 12 days. Hopefully blogging about it won't feel like eggnog forced down your throat. It really will be a Merry Christmas.

Family Photo Shoot

2009-11-12T14:32:00.000-08:00

This is a post dedicated to Chanel who, for some odd reason, is being obstinate about joining facebook where these pictures have already been posted . . . But here I can tell some of the story about how "we will NEVER get family pictures again." (-quote by my dear, sweet, handsome husband.)

I knew it was time to replace the family portrait hanging in our house. Ya know, the one that is from fall 2005 when Brock was a baby. My mother-in-law requested a big group picture, too, so I figured if we were all going to go through the efforts of individual pictures we should just gather at once and get-er-done at one time.

Ok, so that presents STRESSOR #1 with family pictures. Where/who is going to take the pictures. We knew we'd outgrown the studio-package places for the big group. The womenfolk discussed some different people who were into photography. I know there are a lot of REALLY good photographers (kinda feels like the thing to do sometimes if you have a decent camera and are looking for a way to make some cash while staying at home), but I really trust the work of my friend Chris Jenkins. [www.chrisjenkinsphotography.com] So, we booked her for the huge group and she agreed to not only do individual families, but also individual kids, and pretty much whatever else we requested. I'd seen some of her shoots with other friends at a local park here, so we went to Sonata Hills Park up in Seven Hills.

Then we agreed on "fall" colors, which was part of STRESSOR #2. What is it with our consumer economy that we are a full season ahead of what's happening? Christmas decorations out at Halloween? Easter at New Years? Ya know? Anyway, as I was looking for options that would stay in our budget I was irritated at all the Christmas colors out already. Tons of reds, black, gray, turquoise blues (which is the "in" color for winter . . . who cares that it was OCTOBER when I was shopping . . . CLEARLY still fall . . . grrrr.) ANYWAY. My theories of color-coordinating are not probably right or trained, but I know what I like and I had a vision of what I wanted for the fam in order to look good . . . we ARE going to plaster this photo in every Christmas card and on our walls, so . . . When we get pictures done, I'd rather have color than not, and with so many people, it's not okay to say we're going to do "purple" because then we'd look like a huge Grimace or "brown" or we'd blend to each other like a pile of poo. I like to have some pattern, if possible, and different textures. I don't think the girls need to have the EXACT same outfits (they're too old for that now and have their own style), but I am not opposed to it for my boys. I do think the looks should be all jeans OR all khacki, but on a budget I was willing to toss that one out the window.

And that's STRESSOR #3, the budget. Luckily we were all able to split the photog fee, and I was able to narrow our clothes options to what I knew we already had and what I liked: Tyler's golden yellow Nashville shirt (I really liked the shirt on him) and Mackenzie's purple shirt (love that color). From there I pulled out everyones jeans as I washed them (so I'd guarantee they were cleaned come picture Saturday) and then I started to lay the clothes out on the dining table to get a visual. I went to Target to see what options I had there and immediately say the yellow scarf. I love scarves, but don't have a need to wear them too much in Vegas BUT I knew it'd be a perfect match to Tyler's shirt and thought maybe Caylee could wear it (and bonus, it was on clearance for six bucks or so). I found a purple polo shirt for Brevin for $5.99 and the right yellow T-shirt for Brock for $3.99. I was looking for a plaid button up for Briggs, but didn't have any luck. When I laid everything out at home I realized we were looking like the Lakers sports team with the yellow and purple, so I decided to throw in a 3rd basic complimentary color and went for brown. At that point I pulled out my long sleeve brown shirt I've had for several years, my boots from Savers (seriously they cost $.99), Kenzie's brown shoes, and the boys church brown shoes. That left me looking for Caylee's top and shoes, and Briggs top. I went to my hand-me-down bins in the garage to see if I had any options there and found a cream waffle knit shirt that would do Briggs in a pinch if I didn't find anything. The scarf was too big for Caylee, so I decided it'd be my accent color, and Saturday after the early soccer game I swung by K-mart to score brown flats for Caylee ($10.99 - kinda more than I like to spend, but she can wear them to church through the winter or to school on non-P.E. days), and a PERFECT brown polo for Brock. Although it wasn't in the right size, I bought it knowing it would break up too much yellow with Brock and Tyler in the same color solid shirts. I also bought a two pack of tank tops for Caylee at K-Mart knowing I would have to find SOMETHING in purple or brown or yellow to go OVER the tanktop and fast since we were ticking down to prep time and arrival time. I ran super quick to a boutique Rhapsodielle (or something like that, very similar to Forever 21) and found a brown shoulder shrug in an XS that I hoped would work for Caylee ($7.99) and some fun dangley earrings for me in purple (my splurge $8.00) since we needed a 3rd appearance of the purple.

Not that you can see the earrings BUT, here's my law of 3's. There needs to be an appearance at least 3 times of accent colors in a group picture. Purple (4 - Kenzie's and Brevin's shirt, my earrings, Caylee's necklace), Yellow (3- My scarf, Tyler's shirt, Brock's undershirt), Brown (4- Brigg's pants, Brock's and My shirts, and Caylee's shrug), and white (4- Brigg's shirt, Caylee's tank, Brevin's undershirt, and Caylee's hair flower.) And now that you read all that . . . I KNOW!!! I think way too much about this.

I shouldn't really talk too openly about the other STRESSORS of family pictures for the sake of all familial relationships, but it's sufficient to explain I was pretty emotional about our family's pictures and bawled the entire way home. I am SO glad I pushed the point of having a great photographer because she was hard-working and got some amazing results despite a HUGE workload and a woman-on-edge (yeah, that would be me.) Thanks again Chris!!!

What are we raising here?

2009-11-12T10:08:00.000-08:00

Yesterday my mom took me, my sister, and my sister-in-law on our annual shopping day for Christmas presents from Grandma Beth. A few years ago my mom decided it would be easier to bring the moms of the kids along with her and she could bang out her shopping in one swoop for all the grandkids. And now that there are 11 of them, it's a hefty job for one person. Bringing us along means we get to help share the load . . . AND she treats us to lunch AND we get to chat and visit and catch up. (And trust me, about 5 minutes into the day out we had pretty much covered the spectrum of conversation.)

Toward the end of the afternoon I called home to talk to this girl:
My Mackenzie had mentioned she would like a jacket from Old Navy that was on sale this week for 50% off. To get more info before going to that store (since i hadn't seen the commercial she was referring to with the sale info) I asked her:

"Hey, we're headed to Old Navy and I wanted to look at the jackets you were talking about. Can you describe it?"

Mackenzie: "Yeah, it has buttons down the front."

Me: "Is it longer, like past your butt?"

M: "Yeah, it goes down to the middle of the leg. It's a jacket that would go with skinny jeans and high heeled boots and looks like is one you would wear in a New York rainstorm."

Me: I'm THINKING, 'did she just describe an entire outfit and location to tell me what coat it is so I have a complete image right now?' So I say, "Okay. That covers it. Does it have a belt or tie around the middle?"

M: "Yeah, a belt that ties."

And there ya go. I don't know about other 10 yr olds that would describe a jacket like that, but I think my little fashionista is AWESOME and it made for a good laugh from her mom.

Some Ridiculousnesses

2009-10-13T21:14:00.000-07:00

So, I was driving around today in Tyler's truck since my tractor done did break (that means my Excusion doesn't work) and I started to notice and think about things that I found to be ridiculous. Here's a couple of my thoughts (yeah, one of those posts . . . I don't even have pictures, I don't think.)

K, I am brewing a zit. It's on the right side of my chin which is where I normally sprout the beasts, I think because my cell phone rubs right there, and let's face it, phones are germ carriers (mine is, at least). I think adults getting zits are ridiculous. ESPECIALLY when I'm watching my 10 yr. old's skin tone to see if she'll be prone to the lovely pubescent adornments. I just don't think I should have to be worrying about by own too. There should be a rule that once you reach a certain age, like 18, you shouldn't have to have that on your stress list. And I guess it doesn't really stress me like it did when I was in Jr. High and High School, but it's like a constant reminder of yet another flaw I can't control . . . and it's RIGHT on the front of ma money maker. How about bacne if I'm gonna breakout as an adult? Whatever. At least it isn't the row of pimples I would get on my forehead when I was younger (thank you hairspray-ed bangs to heaven for clogging the forehead pores.) Ah, it reminds me of a ridiculous story from when I was in Jr. High I would obsess about all my blackheads on my nose. My parents would catch me staring, squeezing, examining, picking at my nose regularly and would warn me that I was making it worse. I totally thought they were crazy until one night I went after my nose with such a vengeance that I literally bruised my nose. THAT was ridiculous too, I realized, as I had to cover myself with some lame lie about how I got a bruise when my Jr. High friends asked me the next day . . . I couldn't explain that I had been picking zits, so I said my sister threw a spoon at me while we were unloading the dishwasher . . . don't worry, she outed me the following year since my friends REMEMBERED my ridiculous, lame lie.

And let me back this train up to talk about how ridiculous it is that the Excursion is broken. We have too many kids to lose the bus!! What is really ridiculous is that we had to take it to Ford Country. We dropped it off this morning and never heard back from them today. If past experience proves true, I will bet it's at least 3 days before the even diagnose what's wrong with our car and then many more to get it fixed. Isn't that ridiculous? At least we have a warranty and at least we have SUPER great family members and friends who have been willing to help us get from here to thar.

Hmmm, what else is ridiculous? K, since I was driving home this afternoon right at the time the high school kids are walking home, OF COURSE I noticed the RIDICULOUS fashion of boys with skinny jeans that hang halfway off their backsides. WHOOOO thinks that looks good? Can somebody point out to these guys that their pants are clearly too tight if their boxer shorts are PUFFING out the top? And let's be real, the sagging is to give some space in the nether-regions that enjoy some space (or so I've been told). I think it looks dumb, basically. Really, skinny jeans on many women is a touchy scenario, so WHY tempt fate with the boyfolk? Ugh, I think it's ridiculous.

This week I was released from serving in the stake Young Women's presidency. I was the 1st counselor for 4 years. Yup, FOUR! And some people think that's a ridiculous amount of time to be in one calling, but I have loved it. People were congratulating me on being released on Sunday. Really? I think that's funny. Mostly because I was kind sad to know I won't be working with the wonderful women and young women I have been serving with for so long; that I love. It's almost as ridiculous when people congratulate others on getting a calling. Example: "Congratulations on being called to serve as Bishop." REALLY?! Last time I checked church callings weren't really applied for and "awarded." And it seems like people say that more often when the calling is a bigger leadership calling. I dunno, I think it's funny when people say that. They might as well say, "Hey, good for you for being clearly more righteous than the rest of us and going to be sacrificing tons of time for EVERYONE else. And tell your family 'congrats' too since they won't be spending too much time with you while you serve everyone else."

I read something in an Ensign article a couple years ago about being offended and/or causing offense that really changed my life. When I am offended by someone I must consider the intent of the other person. Now, I know I don't know someone else's heart, so I can give the offender the benefit of the doubt that they didn't intend on offending me, or, if I don't know I can ask them if their offense was meant. THEN, I can let go of the hurt or offense once I know offense wasn't meant OR I can offer repentance or forgiveness for trespasses that caused the need for offense. However, there are times when the offense is continual or recurring and in those cases I should protect myself (however that may be). MY responsibility is to make sure I do not intentionally cause offense so that when my heart is examined by those who I may have inadvertently hurt, they will find me blameless, or, offense-giving-less.

That being said, I have decided that I have been spending a ridiculous amount of time and energy apologizing or smoothing over offenses that I never meant to give. I have concluded that there are some that are offended by my mere existence, which is unfortunate since I, well, ya know, exist. I know I have tons of faults/shortcomings/flaws. Heavens knows I am opinionated, am bossy, have control issues, obsess about presentation, and seek for approval from just about everyone. However also LOVE my friends and family, seek to improve myself daily, want to treat others as Christ would (I know, I fall REALLY short!), and I also do NOT seek to offend people, especially those I consider near and dear. And that's all I can control; others' feelings about me and how they judge me are beyond my control (ha, see, I am trying to get better about my control issues!)

*Sigh* I guess that got kinda heavy, so I will end with this last ridiculous thing . . .

THAT CHIC SERIOUSLY LOST 16 POUNDS ON The Biggest Loser?! CRAZY!

It Ain't Nothin' but a Good Time!

2009-10-04T14:01:00.000-07:00

There's nothing like celebrating the hubbub of a back-to-school grind like a getaway for me and Tyler. And the fact that it happened a mere 3 days after school started, the end of August, is really beside the point. [And yes, I am counting as I am typing this realizing that it was 6 weeks ago. WHEN did time start to fly so incredibly fast???]

Our good friends, Derrick and Sherry Stewart, who are QUITE brilliant when it comes to planning good times (i.e. dinner dates, camping trips, etc.) headed up a fantastic trip for the hubs and I and our good friends, Jake and Robin Marshall, to go to Nashville, Tennessee to see the cutie batootie Keith Urban in concert. Because, really, if one is going to see a country star, shouldn't one travel to Nashville to do so? (See, don't you agree with Derrick's logic for all matters?) ACTUALLY, we had all wanted to see Urban in Vegas, but sense our menfolk are dedicated scout leaders and Mr. Kidman would be in Vegas when they were at Camp Hotbox, we had to go somewhere. Nashville is clearly the logical choice.

This trip was pretty indulgent of us; not really provident, ya know, considering the whole "own our own startup" situation, but I am so glad we got away. Tyler and needed a chance to just be together without the stress of kids and work and schedules. And we so enjoy the company of the Stewarts and the Marshalls. Add a LOT of BBQ, a couple of tours, and honky tonks and it was just what the Dr. ordered.

And for the sake of recording for all posterity that I and my husband are fun-loving, concert-going, KEWL people, here's out travel log. (Scan for pictures if that sounds more appealing.)

We went to the airport where Derrick had to break up with his phone so he could focus on our good times. Just kidding. He can do business from ANYWHERE . . .

We took the night flight to Tennessee arriving around midnight. And how cozy is Nashville? There were these cute rocking chairs around baggage claim (yes, yes, we had to check bags since TYLER couldn't slim down his packing to a carry on) AND the most interesting transvestite awaiting us. (Sorry no picture of the man/woman.)

We slickly picked up our stylin' minivan and headed to our hotel. WHICH, I didn't post this picture of us, but the hotel had red cowhide walls in the elevator. I don't know if they were going for sheek, but I found it semi-creepy. But, I digress . . . Our view from the ride:

We got our rooms all situated and enjoyed a liesurely morning with NO carpools, seminary, or packing lunches until it was time to head downtown to check out the local vibe. K, I pretty much loved all the areas of Nashville we saw, but mostly because it was GREEN. It was so thick with foliage you could hardly see past the freeway to see what was beyond the roads. Awesome. BUT, we were all serious about hitting the town to find some good food:

Can you tell how serious Tyler is?

We ended up at this really famous bar and I can't remember the name since I am typing this so long after the event (happy journal reading posterity!) We had our first of many BBQ lunches here, but the highlight was the free line dancing lessons that we did not participate in. We're losers in the embracing the culture so far . . . that happened later Friday night :)

Or I guess, that afternoon. Tyler tried on this sweet leather number. We almost considered buying it, but were too caught up in the buy 3, get 1 free boot sale. Really? 4 pairs of cowboys boots is a lot for one person.

So, after we walked around for a bit we found a tourist stand with this lady selling tours. She wore SWEET black eye liner around her lips and had big blond Dolly Parton hair. She sold us on the entire tour package and we were jazzed for the famous-people-home tour. The boys loved it:

See. I took all these pictures of homes and then forgot whose they were. I think I was most impressed with Alan Jackson's house and most uncomfortble at Trace Atkins' house who lives in a cul-de-sac and our tour bus stopped RIGHT in front of his home while his daughter stood and chatted with her friend. Awkward. Being famous must be hard . . .

We rested up and changed for our hot night on the town. We hopped from honky tonk to honky tonk and enjoyed THE best people watching. The musicians were great, playing for tips and working the crowds. The places were packed and gave Vegas a run for its money as far as wild, good, fun times. We went to this one place and Robin captured this gem of a couple REALLLY enjoying their good time.

Some places we had to wait to get in. This is at Tootsies. It's famous. Willie Nelson has slept on the floor here. And that's gross if you consider how dirty the floor is in these places.

Another highlight of honky tonkin' is all the people that hit on the Stewarts. Both Sherry and Derrick were the hot items in Nashville. I think that was one of the entertaining highlights of the weekend. Well, that, and Derrick getting flipped off from the lady he cut off on the freeway.

We stayed up REALLY late and got up the next morning to look for country shirts. That means shopping. Here's Robin and Jake.

Then we had a city tour, which was pretty interesting. We ate, obviously, more BBQ for lunch. Our tour guide had no teeth, but was much more interesting than the homes tour guy who was too cranky from yesterday.

I can't remember the name of this place either, but it's supposed to remind us of Athena's temple in Greece . . . but it's in Nashville. Don't be thinkin' we went all global or anything.

I think we hit the ice cream shop a few times :)

Tyler, Derrick, and Sherry couldn't hang with the super tourists, so I 3rd-wheeled it with the Marshalls while we hit up some of the famous sites (poster shop, record shop, Ryman Theater (where Grand Ol Opry was for years)). And look who was our tour guide . . .

Willie Nelson? Almost.

We went back to the hotel to freshen up for the concert before heading back downtown for dinner. Here's some of us waiting for dinner . . . it was . . . . yup . . . BBQ. Mmmmm.

The concert was AWESOME! Little Big Town opened and ROCKED it. Then Keith Urban came out and was FANTASTIC! He totally got down in the crowd and referenced being home to sleep in his own bed that night; that he loved being in Nashville. I told Robin I'd love a picture t-shirt of Keith, Nicole, and their baby, but that was not available at the T-shirt stand. All I'll have to do is remember the good times with some pictures and my memories, not a tacky shirt.

And thanks to Derrick who worked getting us great tickets. It was such a fun show!

And then it was more time in the honky tonks. There were way more people and the musicians were great. I wore these boots that were NOT meant for standing around in for 6-7 hours (bad planning), so I totally scored some Old Navy flip flops that were sold at one of the hot dog stands. No joke. Tyler got a Polish dog and I got some flips before we headed to more bars.

This dress was in our lobby. Totally made out of crayons. Cool. Yeah, those are big Crayolas.

And lest you think the hotdog/flip flop stand would be tacky, I captured it before we left on Sunday.

Sunday we completed our touring at the Country Music Hall of Fame and some last minute shopping for those we left behind.

HOWDEEEEEY! Hee Haw set. (My dad used to say you could smell their bad breath through the TV. He didn't care for the show, but I liked it.)

And before we went to the airport, we had to eat, so what's one more plate of BBQ? This was actually, the best joint we ate at, and I would HIGHLY recommend it to anyone who's in the neighborhood.

All and all, I'd give the trip a resounding two thumbs up and Tyler would concur. We sooo enjoyed hanging out with the Marshalls and Stewarts and count ourselves very blessed to have such great friends. Nashville was beautiful, the people were kind, the jazz and country musicians were amazing, and the people watching was top-notch. Basically, we'd do it all again!

Until next time y'all!

Giving Change the Cold Shoulder

2009-09-23T13:37:00.000-07:00

Every now and then things in my lil 'ol life change and I am pretty excited about it. For example, I am thoroughly excited that our weather is finally starting to cool . . . in the mornings and late evenings. I mean, who wouldn't be excited that we can enjoy a few hours in the pre-100s before 10am and after 8pm? And that cooling signifies fall decor. I'm a sucker for orange leaves. And, of course, I am thrilled that in a couple of weeks Brock's preschool starts and that means I'm back to the gym in the mornings. Seriously, I am mostly because I definitely will NOT complain about less jiggle and flab hanging out over the top of my jeans once I change our routine. Frankly, my floppiness is something we will ALL enjoy not having to be a part of. Finally, I bought a few new things on our annual trip to Swiss days and I've been excited to get some new around-the-house decorating projects worked on . . . all to change it up a bit. Just kinda get tired of looking at the same things day after day. Ya know? So, yeah, I KNOW change is good. And even when I KNOW change is good, sometimes it makes me sad.

I don't really want to belabor and whine my life away about what I struggle with, and part of my struggles should be kept a little on the down low for a bit, so I will just share a few thoughts I've recently had. Sometimes change is thrust upon me or those I love with no warning. Or, perhaps the warning signs of change-a-comin' have been there and I have purposefully ignored them. I dunno, but I do think there is a mourning process that comes along with saying good-bye to the past. Because Tyler's new job endeavor has taken us to lands unknown, I've been discovering all sorts of new aspects and mourning my comfy past. And even though I know I've had the same WONDERFUL church calling for 4 years, I am now wishing it could go on forever even though I know the changes can/may be just as blessing-filled. I have several friends whose lives have been dramatically changed and as I feel and see those changes start to eek their effects into my own life, I want to give it a good 'ol fashioned ARMADILLO position. Ya know, the covering of all sensitive areas and throwing a tough outer shell kind of a move? Not that it makes anything any different, the changes are inevitable and usually out of my control, but nonetheless I still struggle with the whole thing.

I need to get on this change ship that is sailing by with many of my loved ones, but some days I feel like I should be the dramatic, armed-crossed, back-to-the-ship, refusing to leave the dock kind of person. And yet, I will be REALLY bummed to hear of all the good adventures and lessons learned and trials overcome by those who climbed, crawled, or were forced onboard of this looming change vessel. I guess it's time to get my sea legs ready . . .

Getting my Blog Mojo back

2009-09-20T12:56:00.000-07:00

I have been in a blog funk over a while. I don't know what's so hard about sitting down and writing what's been going on, but I think I get caught up in other things (eh hem, facebook) and torn about what to write. More than anything, I know I need to be better about recording our family events. The biggest blessing of this blog has been recording our lives for ALL posterity. Too, though, I know I need to have a place to voice my feelings and opinions about stuff.

We have been busy all summer and since my computer has been weighed down by the massive picture folder I have been hesitant to add more pictures until I backed up and moved pics from one computer to the other. That is tonight's project and tomorrow I will be sorting through the 4,947 pictures I took in 2008. I. am. not. joking. I have got to pull that into something manageable since there is NO way I will be scrapbooking those. I do enjoy the picasa collage option and will probably be making several of those to scrapbook the entire 2008. This summer my friends hosted a summer scrapbooking challenge and I got a whopping 27 pages done. Several of them were from Christmas cards we received last year (I like to keep all your pictures to compare from year to year) and then I did a scrapbook from the two years I taught. . . in 2000-2002. I doubt I will ever be caught up with the scrapbooking thing, but I am making little progress.

Because I need more time to work on projects, I am hosting another Scrapfest in November. This is just a bare bones kind of scrapfest that will only take place for one full 24 hour day and won't have all the giveaways and hooplah of the big shindig in February. If anyone's interested in joining (there's only 25 more spots available) you can go to the SCRAPFEST blog and click on the link to pay ($25.00) and find out more info. And for the gals who already registered I say "RIGHT ON!" We're going to have a good time and I'm looking forward to the smaller group.

Today I had a pretty emotional day. There were just several things that caused me to be overcome with emotion and gave me pause to have more gratitude in my life. My day was pretty much spent in church and, honestly, as torturous as that may sound to some, I really needed it. Sometimes I think my activity in my church becomes kinda rote and just a thing to do on Sundays, but the past couple of weeks I've been thinking about reactivating my self in my faith. I went to church this morning and dragged along my friend Stephanie and her beautiful daughter Issa with me. The couple that spoke talked about keeping the Sabbath day holy (which is all good and everything), but what really struck me was the simple admonition of the husband to the congregation. The sacrament meeting was loud, which isn't uncommon in a Mormon church due to all the kids, but this young man and his wife have had only one baby and he died after only being on earth for a week. He got quite emotional (which then I got really emotional) as he reminded all of us with unruly-climb-on-the-benches-spread-goldfish-crackers-make-too-many-sound-effects kids to be grateful for the noise because there are families out there who long to have the noise and haven't been blessed like that. UH! It was so tender. Later, after I dropped my kids off at our ward, I went to ward conference and spied a good friend of mine rocking her 5 year old "baby" in her arms. I think he fell asleep and as I could only see the tip top of his head from behind her shoulder I thought of what it must be like to have my youngest be 5. So much of the time I roll my eyes with the "responsibility," the "duty," the "job," and [yes, sometimes] the "burden" of ALL my kids. Tyler and I have been blessed. I know that mentally, but sometimes it takes a heartfelt testimony or a watching eye to really feel what I should about the great blessing of being the mom to my kids. With five kids I think I am looking forward to that day that Briggs is 5, but I believe this friend of mine wants more. She deserves more kids. She's a good mom to her kids. She's a good mom to my kids. And yet for whatever reason her baby is 5 and started kindergarten and she fills her days teaching others' children and serving those around her instead of swaddling a newborn. This same friend led the ward choir and I really struggled to keep it together for the whole song. Being there to fulfill my calling that I have loved for the past 4 years was a true blessing today I really feel like I should thank this friend for providing me with the opportunities to feel some tender mercies. (Thanks!)

So, in light of this reminder to be grateful for my family (and yes, even all their racket!) I figure it's time to share some of the past few month's happenings. Keep scrolling down for a couple posts and hopefully I will be able to post more soon. Three month gaps in the history keeping of the Barlow family means there's a lot of details I am not going to remember.

First day of School, First day of School

2009-09-19T22:52:00.000-07:00

This year marks my official halfway mark of having children in school. Since Brev is in halfday kindergarten, I officially have 2.5 kids in school (mornings) and 2.5 kids at home (afternoons.) The morning of was warm, sunny, a little stressful, and plaid themed. JUST KIDDING, that was just coincidence.

Brevin, 1st day of kindergarten

Caylee, 1st day of 2nd grade

Mackenzie, 1st day of 5th grade

The kids have all reported school has been great most every day. Caylee is most enthusiastic and I'm realizing boys give one word reports whereas girls give me all the details. Brevin has been a big helper in kindergarten and I'm glad we kept him to be one of the older kid in his class. The kids all like their teachers and so far there has been minimal friend drama. [I never know what to do with all that. Do I get involved? Not involved? Be sympathetic? Nonchalant?]

One morning during the second week of school I dropped off Mackenzie on her playground and then rolled down the window and yelled as loud as I could, "I LOOOOVVVEEE YOU!!!" to see if I could embarrass her and she just laughed at me {LOVE that it didn't embarrass her and she laughed at me!} so then me and the boys did the same thing to Caylee when she got out of the car at her playground. Of course she ate it up. Brevin, by the time we rounded the corner to drop him off, was begging that me and Brock do the same for him. He barely got out of the car before he was looking back waiting for us to shout at him. I hope it made their day and helped them enjoy school a bit more.

Almost every day, after dropping the kids Brock says, "Well Mom, it's just the free [three] of us now. What are we going to dooo?" I call us the three amigos. Once preschool starts in a couple weeks it'll be date mornings for me and Briggs. I love it though. The routine and excitement everyday. I'm glad my kids love school and I'm so grateful for their teachers who allow them good experiences.

Work it girls!

2009-09-19T21:55:00.000-07:00

A few years ago, when Mackenzie and my niece Sydney were starting school they put on a fashion show for my parents, my brothers, and our families modelling their new school clothes. This VERY quickly became a family tradition and something the girls look forward to while the dads and brothers and even the uncles roll their eyes over the whole thing. BUT, everyone is super supportive when it comes time to walk the walk and the girls EAT it UP. Here's some pictures of my girls from this year's fashion show:

Caylee in her "Little Ms. Stubborn" shirt. Tried for Little Miss Sunshine, but she wanted no part of it. She wouldn't budge. I guess if the shirt fits, we should buy it.

Kenzie in a handmedown t-shirt and some new jean shorts

After all the hair flipping . . . it's a Caylee close-up

Another handmedown. On behalf of the entire Barlow family, we'd like to thank Shae Haycock for bringing this sweater to our home. (Oh and total sidenote: Mackenzie had a meltdown about these jeans she has on. They're a size up from what she's been wearing and by the time it's cool enough to wear them they'll look like they were made for her, but she had MAJOR meltdown (yes, tears and everything) over how "ridiculous" and "awful" she looked in them. Oh I cannot WAIT for puberty.)

Mmmmm Hmmmmm Ms. Caylee

"What? Were you talking to me, a 5th grader???" (P.S. Shirt from Savers, or as Mackenzie and Sydney call it, "the best store EV-VERRR!)

Just realizing I have not seen Caylee wear these shorts yet. I wonder where they are . . .

One of Kenzie's favorites this year:

Caylee totally busted out with a rap video dance move mid model. No, I am not fearful AT ALL that this is art imitating her future life, right??? She just couldn't resist a little Michael (note background music)

And then Kenzie got all hard core.

Here's all our models. (Zoee, Sydney, Caylee, Shae (friend), and Kenzie.) I'm not sure where Brooklyn was for the final shot.

And the other gals with their fashions:

I was so glad when Michael came home . . .

2009-09-19T21:51:00.000-07:00

It feels a little silly to blog about something that happened SOO a month ago, but let's face it, I'm months behind so this is a drop in a very large bucket and I might as well get over feeling silly. And let's face it, these apologies are going to people who are just grateful to have something new in their googlereaders.

Sooo, my baby brother Michael came home from his mission on August 13th and we were so happy to have him home. Mike's return had been anticipated for a long time and I had FINALLY really started to miss him. I mean, I missed him the whole time, but I knew he was where he was supposed to be, so I didn't really think about it too much. Right after girls' camp we had a meeting and the missionaries were all there from our entire stake. They closed the meeting by singing the closing song and THAT was the first time I felt a genuine ache for my brother having been gone for (almost) two years. And just in time since from that meeting I only had to wait about 6 weeks.

We all got all cute (didn't want to have him think we got all grubby while he was gone) and made sure to arrive at the airport at a prompt time. Getting there before my mom was a particular feat since she contemplated spending the night JUST IN CASE his flight came in early. (okay, maybe not really, but she was, of course, really excited.) Here's the grandkids waiting before hand. I had asked who was excited to see Uncle Mike. Only Brooklyn fessed up and I think Austin is trying to hide his enthusiasm (Seth is just hiding behind the pole):

We were joined by our cousins Jerolyn, Maggie, and family friend Chris for Mike's arrival. My brother, David, was a tid bit late, but had provided us with cute posters to hold anyway.

Ok. And I just have to say how great it is that the younger cousins (pictured above) love each other as much as the older generation pictured below:

OK, so this picture is out of order, but this is from our Summer Countdown chain. Additional writing by Briggs and I think it says, "I guess I'm excited to meet this guy I don't even know."

Here's a shot with all the grandkids and Grandma waiting for Mike. We narrowed down which escalator it would be by asking the first ones down which flight they were on.

Michael's companion was actually from Las Vegas too, which made for a large crowd and a huge cheer. I think it would be great if people would always cheer for others when they got off the escalators into baggage claim. We could hire our services. Anyway, here's what I saw looking back at the crowd once we knew it was his flight coming into baggage claim:

And what I saw looking up the escalator. (That's Mike with the camera blocking his face.)

Oh and you know my mom lost it about right then.

Poor Michael wanted to hug and greet and meet and all Brock wanted to do was climb on him and be held. We kept having to tell him to get off of Uncle Mike, but considering Brock had been praying for Uncle Mike for two years, I think he was pretty excited that he did come home safely.

K, I'm not just sayin' this because Mike's my brother (okay, maybe I am), but I thought he was so good-looking! He didn't look that much different than when he left. It was just good to see him. With the parentals:

And all the siblings. [Note. We did not color coordinate, but HOW COOL that we mostly all match.]

The kidlets with their Uncle Mike. Now who are they going to send all their construction paper drawings to?

It was a great day for our whole family. We went to the church where Mike was released as a missionary for the church by our stake president and then we went to lunch at In-and-Out Burger. I took my kids home to nap and give Mike some space before the adults went to dinner at BJs and then to the church to play a great game of dodgeball. Nothing says "glad you're home" like a good whack with a dodgeball.

Mike's now in the swing of things with school and work and cell phones and fancy Mac laptops (the perks of being the baby . . . TOTALLY kidding Mike. I meant the perks of working hard before your mission to save up for fancy Mac laptops!) It's fun to have him around and to talk with him and just have him be close. The first day home we stopped by Mom's for a minute and when Brevin saw Mike he said, "Hey! What are you doing here???" I think he was genuinely surprised Mike was still around. The great news is he's not going anywhere so out of touch again. I'm grateful. Love me some Baby G! Welcome home Mike!

I'm Feeling Lucky

2009-08-12T15:10:00.000-07:00

As I was photo editing this hunky picture of Tyler, I clicked on the Picassa editing button called "I'm feeling lucky" and I thought, "I really AM feeling lucky." Tyler celebrated his 35th birthday on Sunday and I could not be more grateful to be married to him. To say I think he's wonderful would be a gross understatement, because that's just where it starts. I kinda find it amusing when I hear that people think things in any kind of a negative way, because CLEARLY they don't know him that well (yes, you know who you are) even if they think they do. And the fact that he is so loved and appreciated and befriended by so many good people in his life supports my perspective more than the naysayers.

This has been a crazy past month for us as Tyler quit his secure, stable, boring, life-sucking job at a bank to pursue his own business. The decision was not made lightly and has been a real leap of faith, but I trust him. Isn't that a good feeling? Yeah, it is, because even though we don't yet have insurance and we are still in the setting-up stages, I KNOW Tyler works hard for our family. I know his concern is for my and our kids' welfare long before he considers himself. Heck, I'm fairly certain he's considered his business partners, his extended family, and about everyone else before he considers himself. Years ago, when I asked Tyler if we could have our own house and not live with his parents anymore, I knew that meant he'd be trading in his dreams of a professional golf career for the daily business grind that he dreaded a bit. Luckily his career was well-advised and he had a great support system (not to mention golf benefits, customer lunches/visits) that he wasn't a banker who sat in a suit behind a desk from 8-5. Long story short, for many years, his job suited him just fine. Since the tank of the economy and some greedy maneuverings, that ideal banker job was replaced by another more fraught with suit-wearing, cell-phone-call-monitering (aka babysitting), and a lot less satisfaction. It was time for a change. And change we have.

Being a business owner (and the wife of one) has brought with it a lot of lessons learned already and one of them on my part has been patience and faith. Not real easy lessons for me to swallow, but I'm trying nonetheless. I'm grateful for Tyler's willingness to go for it when others would be scared, content, or unable. I'm grateful to REALLY believe that if we lose it all we can build it back again. And I'm grateful to know that he loves me and I love him and we both love our family so we'll be alright if everything else goes away. Lest you think this post is too Pollyanna, I'll admit to my bites of cynicism and frustration . . . probably out of fear and my loss of control than anything else. But here's what really makes me know I'm lucky, Tyler keeps forgiving me and being there for me. I love that man.

Soo, with this mature man of 35 I am thankfully wed. We used to joke before we were ever married that he definately got the short end of our relationship stick, and that's never been more true than these days. I love you, Babe (even though you never read these posts and I could tell crazy lies about myself and what a wonderful, perfect wife I am and you would never dispute me online!) Yes . . . I'm feeling pretty lucky.

(Post Script: After writing that I'm feeling pretty lucky, I figured it would be my luck that Tyler WILL read this post and for the next month he'll be reminding me what "feeling lucky" really means.)

25 again?

2009-08-11T21:24:00.000-07:00

One time my friend Amber (who I have totally lost contact with . . . so sad) called me on my birthday. I was walking around Target and when I answered she just said, all aghast and surprised sounding, "Can you believe you are 25? Man, you are so old!" I totally cracked me up because I think that year I turned 29 or something. I don't know why it caught me so funny. Maybe because I never feel any older than 25 (or 19 for that matter) and all my friends seem about 25 too. It's kinda making it weird that our kids are now 10, 14, 16 years old (which makes us teenage mothers), but still . . . Anyway, my most favorite sister in the whole wide world turned 25 this year (I know, can you believe it? For the 6th time. It's amazing.)

(Erin and Jerolyn celebrating Erin's birthday at Zaba's)

So, to celebrate this momentous day in her life, we met for a yummy friends lunch at Zaba's. I'm sure she wasn't totally shocked as she arranged a couple years ago for lots of my friends to meet us for lunch there, but that was this year's plan for her and we had a great time. Our friend, Sandi, manages the place and she reserved a bunch of tables for us and we filled them best we could with burritos, bowls, and chips and guac.

And birthday brownies. Oops, should have gotten the 2 & 5 candles.

Thanks to all our friends who came to celebrate with us and a special thanks to Erin for being born. I'm pretty sure she knew exactly what she was doing when she jumped to the front of the gonna-be-born-right-after-my-sister line. She has always been my best playmate and friend. If there were horrible news to tell my kids that I couldn't tell them, or fabulous times that I couldn't celebrate with them, or secrets to share that they can't tell me . . . I want them to tell them to Erin. There are days when I talk to her a billion times, we text a million more, and then we sit up and chat on facebook just to make sure we have it all covered - and sometimes that's not enough. I feel her pains and worry about her happiness. I still think I should protect her and help her even though she's completely capable and has a wonderful, funny, supportive husband in Kevin. Bottom line, she's "my person" and I love her. Lots. Here's some of us that celebrated her birthday, because they think she's great too.

Later that night the family gathered for some yummy Metro Pizza dinner and then some friends' families joined us for cake, ice cream, and homemade scones. Oh yeah, and blueberry crumb cake that nobody really ate. Thanks to the folks' for doing all that; they think she's pretty swell too.

Here's to lots more 25th birthdays! Love you, Erin!

Take my blood, but hold the details, please!

2009-08-02T16:55:00.001-07:00

K, I have a ba-dillion things to blog about (most of which my mom will be the only one to really care once I post them), but thought I'd share this loverly experience I had at Quest Diagnostics on Friday.

SINCE Tyler is now a thriving business owner (okay, maybe not thriving, but we're going to use a lot of positive speak when mentioning said new business venture) I had one final day of insurance so I went to have my blood work run (nothing exciting, just normal blood panel check-up stuff.) Of course I had to wait a bit, but it wasn't too bad, when the phlebotomist called me back to start the poking and prodding and sucking of the blood. Now, I do NOT want to sound judgemental, but I immediately take stalk in the pictures on the bulletin board and the demeanor of the woman helping me and I surmise that late 40 something, nearly balding woman is a tough cookie. She clearly has children and a couple of grandchildren, and based on the accent she is not from Vegas. By the end of our "visit," after poking both my arms, everything I had concluded in the first 30 seconds was confirmed. All and all it wasn't an unpleasant experience, if you don't count that the phlebotomist never once looked me in the face - wierd.

HOWEVER, as she was moving the needle around trying to run into a vein, another blood lady comes by our open door and announces that she's going to the bathroom. There was a quick, but kinda TMI conversation about how the other woman was telling my lady because my lady was "in charge" and since the other woman was planning on being "in there awhile" she wanted to let my lady know. At the time I had two thoughts, "My lady should really be focusing on finding my vein AND who in the world has such a candid conversation in front of patients." It only got better when the other woman came out. Here was their conversation:

Other woman: "Boy I'll tell ya. That sure spells R-E-L-I-E-F. I really had to pee."
My lady: "Oh yeah?"
Other woman: "Yeah, like you'd say, 'Like a racehorse.' I had to pee like a racehorse."
My lady: "It's because you hold it too long."
Other woman: "Nah, it's because I'm too fat. I got no bladder control."

Now, I understand that place is all about the fluids, but c'mon!!! I cannot remember being in a situation where I was witness to such an unprofessional conversation. Luckily on the second arm we were able to get the sample needed and I was out of there. I dunno, maybe I'm getting old, but conversations about the bathroom habits are best left to close friends, family, and the blogs. Sheesh!

My Birfday Wishes Came True

2009-06-23T09:05:00.000-07:00

Dear Erin,

Thank you for insuring that I had a wonderful birthday yesterday. Thanks for taking the kids shopping so they could pick something out for me and then thanks for wrapping it all. I had a great morning opening the little gifts of my favorite things while we had breakfast at the creamery. And thanks for the jacket. Maybe I'll be half as cool as you.

Erin, I am so grateful you are my sister. There aren't many who'll invite their sister and her five kids to trapse through their family vacation with them and NOT spend the entire time shouting at her onry nieces and nephews. I am thankful that you love them, even when their naughty (like at 11pm last night at bedtime.) While I know we're creating memories for our kids, I love staying up late with you on our laptops, watching crummy TV, and having you finish all these projects you brought with you. You are the queen of multi-tasking! After all the planning, organizing, thinking-it-through-ness, and efforts, you deserve a killer nap.

I love you!

*****************

Okay, now to yesterday's festivities. About my birthday, I wanted to give a HUGE thank you to my sister (who went way overboard to insure I had a great day) and then also, many thanks for all the sweet birthday wishes from friends and family. My cousin Rick even sent a wish from his hospital bed . . . how sweet is that? Another friend sang to me and then a lot of wonderful good wishes. It was really great. Thanks a ton.

So, for my birthday we did go to the creamery and it felt very birthday-fied. Erin's blog has all the pictures and goods from that brunch (since we didn't get out and moving until 11ish.) Then we headed up to the "This is the Place" monument park to partake in the pioneer goodness. An extra bonus that Uncle Brandon came a joined us for a little bit. My kids have so missed him and it was great to see him.

This was the second year we came here and Mackenzie actually asked if we could *PLEASE* stay until closing. This year we got a group photo (see Erin's blog) and saw a lot more than we did last summer, but we didn't even get to everything. Caylee thinks it would be a dream job to grow up and work at the pioneer park. Among the favorite activities were the train ride, working in the woodshop, and the pony rides. I could hardly get Brock out of the petting zoo and Brevin LOVED posing with a real gun in our picture. (After we were done with our pictures he was "showing" this lady the gun and waved it in her face. She didn't like that too much and proceeded to lecture him sternly about not pointing guns in people's faces. Uncle Brandon was all anxious about Brevin getting in trouble by someone else and I totally just rolled my eyes. Ya know, after nearly two weeks with 9 kids, I'm not going to freak out about Brevin's improper gun pointing [I don't even think he knew it was real and we all know it's not loaded . . . it's a prop for heaven's sake]. I'm sure the woman wanted me to react too, but she had it under control. )

Here I am talking to my father-in-law who gave me a birthday call. He was points ahead of Tyler who remembered to give me some birthday love at 9:48pm last night. All's fair in love and war, right? I totally forgot his birthday in 2003 while we were up here for his cousin's wedding. I figure we're all square now. It happening more as we get older; we forget things.

After our afternoon at the park, and a few wrong turns, and 1.5 hours later we made it to Aunt Jeanette's and Uncle Randy's for a yummy dinner. It's always fun to visit with them and the girls LOVED hanging out with Jessi while the boys followed Josh nonstop. They will forever remember that stop since we got to cook s'mores in their backyard, Brock played lacrosse, Brevin scored in the lego options, and Caylee survived their big, furry cats. Good times by all. I just love them . . . all of Tyler's family :)

Today we're relaxing, getting the carpet fixed, going to a swim park, cleaning and packing so we can head on out in the morning. I'll be happy to get home (to a super clean house . . . someone give Tyler the heads up that I'm expecting that, would ya?!). So far I'm really loving the summer vacation and it's going to continue to be fun with free movies, swimming, camping, and hello! HARRY POTTER. Hope you're all having a good time too.

Life in These Parts

2009-06-21T22:13:00.000-07:00

Because my sister and I are master planners, we'd checked out the weather sitch and discovered yesterday was to be a rainy day. PERFECT for walking over to the Wilk at BYU and bowling a game with the kids. They were all excited and the perfect thing about the Wilk bowling alley is they don't look like we're freakishly odd for coming in with 9 kids. Come to think of it, not many places have looked twice at us. If we were having a Vegas vacation I'm sure we'd garner a lot of comments. But we're not. We're in happy valley and I could live here. I really could. I'd have to talk myself into the bubble, but once here I could see myself loving every minute of it. Maybe in retirement. Then Tyler could fish on the river everyday and I could hang out in the BYU Bookstore.

We WERE going to peruse the campus, but by then the rain had come and our cityfied kids don't like wet grass, so we headed to the Creamery on 9th for an ice cream treat . . . and french fries. Holy toledo the fries were as good as the desserts. AND, and, and they have big vats of ranch, fry sauce, AND ketchup to fill as many cups of dips as you want. Now that's a generous eatery, if you ask me. There's nothing worse than having a ration of fry sauce, if you want my opinion about it. And here's something else I've noticed on our trip. There are REALLY friendly sales clerks here. They're chatty and easy to talk to (well, except the chic at Wal-Mart, but Wal-Mart is not so "happy valley" anyway.) AND the cashiers are super patient when people write checks (like at Taco Bandido). Because I have also noticed a lot of people writing checks when they cash out and I'm rolling my eyes thinking "DEBIT CARD PEOPLE!" I even heard a guy ask his friend to pay for his lunch at Carl's Jr. (the other day) and that he'd "write [him] a check for his own portion." Are you kidding me? I don't think they realize how good the card swiping feels . . . or maybe they worry others will think they're charging it all and getting into debt. I don't know, but it kinda makes me laugh to see such an antiquated practice in full glory. ANYWAY, back to the brainwashing we do with our kids so they'll want to grow up and go to BYU:

While we were gorging on our treats it did start to sprinkle again and we all walked home in the rain. Then I relaxed with some of the kids while Erin ran some errands. One of the things we've had to fight with Briggs is the stairs. Since there are two sets, we've had to barricade them so Briggs won't climb up them since coming down is not something he's mastered yet. However, the longer we're here, the more he's figuring out ways around our plans.

The kids have had a real stressful week. Can't you tell?

Today was a beautiful Sunday morning and we all got up to go to a church service in Payson. We were late, by about 8 minutes {I know, shock, gasp, gulp! Not Sarah!? Late?}, but I thought that was decent for such a large troop. Afterward we totally invaded the Rices, and on Father's Day no less. Heather and I went to high school together and she was my one and only college roommate (unless you count Tyler.) I have loved her ever since I was friends with her and her generosity is only one of the reasons why. Her home is beautiful and SOOO impressive with all the projects she and her hubby Chris have completed. I think it's fun, too, that our kids are similar in ages. I will totally be puttin in my order for Briggs to date her Bridget OR for Brevin to date her Katelyn one day down the road. They are a wonderful family and I REALLY loved spending time with them all. It's hard when they come to Vegas to coordinate everything, so it was a real treat. And Chris, I totally owe you that foot massage. Next Mother's Day at my house.

Lunch

Future BYU roommates?

The giants and Beauty!

Seriously what a great family!

After we left the Rices, we decided to take the kids up to the Provo temple where they could run off some of their energy. Of course that energy was spent whining about the pictures we made them take with us and the temples in the background and having breakdowns over the games being "unfair." At one point Erin and I watched a full blown smackdown with 3 of my 5 kids and while I should have probably chastised them for acting like raging lunetics, we just watched and laughed and commentated about the whole thing. It was over some kickball game that excluded Caylee and Brevin so they were all mad at Mackenzie. Caylee started mocking Kenzie and pushing her, but Mackenzie put on her cool and just agreed with everything Caylee was saying which REALLY made her mad. When the pushing didn't get them into the game, Brevin stole Kenzie's new shoes and started running away with them while Caylee started drawing on pages of her new notebook. (Both of those got a huge reaction from Kenzie.) Anyway. Kids. Can't live without them and I surely am getting tired of yelling at them for that kind of stuff. *sigh*

Ok, not that you can see, but I had to crop a couple who were laying next to the fountain on the next picture. That's something else I've kinda laughed at on the trip. It seems every park we've been to we've been a witness to a cheesy college date. Tyler would love it. The couple were very into each other and I'm sure there's not a sweeter date than going up to the temple on a Sunday afternoon.

We got home and once the kids were in jammies we made them a gourmet meal. (Minus the Coke . . . that stuff's only for me.) Ah yeah, some pigs in a blanket action. Go ahead. Like your lips. They're tasty.

And to cap off tonight we wrote Uncle Mike some birthday cards for his birthday, which is Tuesday. I can't believe he's 21 and coming home from his mission in just about 8 weeks! To make him super trunky I sent him an itunes card and some pictures of my kids so he "can know what faces he's looking for as he comes down the airport escalator in August." I know, so mean, huh! I love the squirt, though, and can't wait for him to be home.

Tomorrow I'm really excited to go back to the "This is the Place" park and spend a few hours and then we'll be having dinner with Tyler's aunt and uncle. Always good times with his family. It'll be awesome. (Note: People say "awesome" a lot here. It's awesome.)

We're all in this together

2009-06-20T11:46:00.000-07:00

We are still surviving. I couldn't blog yesterday, which would have been ideal since we pretty much sat around all day, because I needed to purchase an external hard drive to clear off some memory. That's right, I have completely filled up my laptop's memory. Could be because some months, like this one, I have more than 430 pictures in my files.

Back to the recap. On Thursday, we rousted ourselves to make it to the Oquirrh Mt. temple open house. It probable would have been more exciting had Erin and I made it to bed before 4am, but we didn't, so our 10:30am appointment seemed REALLY early. On our way (hurrying, of course) to the freeway Erin totally got pulled over for speeding (we're not showing a good record at this point!) Call it what you want, but the cop let her go with only a warning and we were on our way. Now, for my non-LDS friends, a temple open house was a unique experience because normally only recommend-holding members attend the templ whereas a temple open house, is, well, totally open. That meant we got to take our kids and let them see the beautiful workmanship and have a better understanding of what we do when we "go to the temple." I was a bit surprised at the number of people who were there at 10:30am on a Thursday. AND, it is quite the production. I was incredibly impressed with the beauty of the temple and the detailed designs within. And the kids all really loved the "reception tent" that served water and cookies.

After the temple tour, we had a quick lunch at Carl's Junior (which is a total lie, because feeding all of us is a pretty good production). Then we went to the Gateway Discovery Children's Museum in downtown SLC. K. Totally cool. The kids were completely busy for 3.5 hours. Mostly because I refused to leave until closing because it cost me an arm and a leg to get my kids in (they charged for Briggs, even. And yes, without an arm and a leg it was a little tricky playing with all the stuff. I did manage, though. Thanks for the concern.) On our way back into Provo we stopped by Wal-Mart to stock up again on foodstuffs and supplies and by Taco Bell for dinner and then I "put" the kids to sleep by falling asleep with them. When I woke at midnight, Erin was up blogging, but I just went back to sleep. I figured I needed the energy for Friday's activities.

And it was a good thing I did sleep a full night because all the sitting around the townhouse on Friday took a lot out of me :) Unfortunately we found a little water damage from a leaking condensation tube from the air conditioning, so yesterday we waited for the handyman to come pull the carpet back, rip out the pad, and loan us a lovely commercial floor fan to dry it all out. Truth be told, it was good for the kids to lounge in their jammies for the day and then we packed a dinner picnic to head up the canyon for dinner. And then Erin's car wouldn't start. And that was bad because my big rig couldn't squeeze next to her to jump her dead battery. But then it did start and she headed to Wal-Mart (again, I swear we'd be in bad shape without Wal-Mart.) While she was getting a new battery I picked up an external hard drive and we wound up just inside Provo Canyon for a good dinner of sandwiches, chips, grapes, and cookies. The kids ran around and by dusk I tried to get a couple games of Simon Says and Red Light/Green Light. It was a good thought, but MY kids, apparantly are really poor losers and so we gave up, packed up, and headed home. We ice creamed the kiddos and then bathed and bedded them and I was able to clean off my computer.

Man, I just realized how many boring details I just shared. Sorry. Unless you feel like you are now on vacation with us. And in that case, welcome. (BTW, we had cookies and cream ice cream last night. It was good.) So let's get to the pictures; they may keep your interest over my long-winded praddle.

Here's Mackenzie. She's been a HUGE help on this trip. She cracked me up at the museum since she totally spent a lot of time, when she was playing in the store, organizing and straightening the shelves. She did make me a bit proud in her efforts. She and Sydney have had a good time together . . . most of the times.

And what can I say about Caylee other than she has either "really LOVED this trip" or been sure it's "the WORST trip EVER!" That's my girl. Hot AND cold. I'm realizing she does much better when she's fully rested; I mean WAY less breakdowns. She's still snarky and ripped off that there's no girl cousin her age on this trip (painful when we've told the kids to pair off . . . she has to be my partner, poor girl.)

Oh, and Brevin has been pretty good times. Unless he has to wait for anything. I totally can see where his impatience comes from because I lose it on him when he starts to whine and flail about if he doesn't get what he asks for RIGHT that minute. He's been off the Nintendo DS for a few days and has miraculously survived.

Brock has seemed more clingy to me this trip, but has also really clicked with Brooklyn and they play as much as they can . . . when they're not teasing each other. He's suffered from being one of the littler ones when he so badly wants to be able to do what the other, older kids can do. Each night that we've been here he asks me to sing to him and scratch his back. But then he tells me exactly what to sing and where to scratch which defeats the purpose of having that put him to sleep.

And poor Briggs has been run ragged. He hasn't gotten nearly the sleep he gets at home and since he's being pulled out of his carseat every five minutes, his catnapping skills are getting stronger by the day. I thought he'd be walking a little bit more, but he's in that "crawling is way faster phase." We've had to be speedy fast to keep him off the stairs.

And, yes, I'm hanging in there, too. I love spending time with my sister. She's been so patient with all of us and I'm trying not to be the naggy aunt who keeps after the kids for rough-housing and teasing and general kid shenanigans. But when I am compared to her, it's a losing game for me. It's a fun little tradition that we've started and several times we've talked about things we'll do "in a few years when the kids are older." And even then I fully expect that, for part of the trip, you'll find us like this.

Pease and love YO! From Utah.

Thumbs Report

2009-06-18T01:15:00.000-07:00

Here's our report on Wednesday, thanks to Brock's THUMBS UP or THUMBS DOWN in depth analysis.

Things from today that were THUMBS UP (a.k.a. good, great, happy, not stressful, not cuss-worthy, praiseworthy)

*SLEEPING IN

*CHEAP BREAKFAST (thank you cold cereal!)

*EASY CHECK-OUT of MARSH CREEK INN

*SAFE TRIP TO TWIN FALLS, IDAHO

*PICNIC LUNCH

*@ SHOSHONE FALLS

*COUSIN with a LOVE AFFAIR for BABY BRIGGS

*TWIN FALLS, IDAHO TEMPLE

*SAFE RETURN TO BURLEY, ID

*SEEING MEGAN, her cute BABY BUMP, and meeting CADE

*ANOTHER MEAL @ TACO BANDITO w/ my UNCLE LARRY (where we ran into my dad's good friend, Kenna Wyatt. LOVE that about small towns . . . AND she totally remembered my name even though she was Erin's 3rd grade teacher.)

*NOT STOPPING FOR THE BATHROOM FROM BURLEY to PROVO

*MADAGASCAR 2

*SINGING my BOYS to SLEEP . . . FINALLY

*HAVING ACCESS TO LAUNDRY AND INTERNET

THINGS ABOUT TODAY THAT WERE THUMBS DOWN

*REPACKING THE CAR

*BAD NEWS from a GOOD FRIEND

*NOT ENOUGH TIME TO PLAY while at SHOSHONE FALLS

*CAYLEE having a MELTDOWN . . . AGAIN

*NOT SEEING RANDY and DAN again to say GOOD-BYE

*SICK MIKE (although Brock now believes that Marsha actually IS a Grandma since he saw the Bomp-pa on his sickbed)

*SUPER DOOPER HEAVY RAIN THROUGH SLC that was SCARY!!!

*GRUMPY BABY at MIDNIGHT who WILL NOT GO TO SLEEP!

*EATING ONE LAST CHERRY EMPENADA at MIDNIGHT

*STAYING UP TOO LATE TO FINISH ONE MORE BLOG

Where The Wild Things Go

2009-06-18T01:00:00.000-07:00

'Tis midnight plus on day #6 of our little trip and I have got some catchin' up to do of our good times (and a few not-so-good-ones) on our trip. I know my sister has blogged and added pictures to her facebook and so blah-dee-blah-blah to her for being so on the ball. I DO have one extra kid than her so for those of you who are reading both our blogs, hang on for a lot of repeats. Probably. I don't even know if I can remember back to Sunday. Which is where I left off.

Sunday is the day of rest. Right, right. Or on vacation in Island Park it is the rainy day we drove into West Yellowstone to go to the Bear and Wolf Discovery Center and to get ice cream at Dairy Queen. It was a religious experience I tell you. If it makes all of you feel better we did contemplate going to the "visitor's" church where you can wear jeans, but the suggestion was veto-ed pretty quick. The Wildlife park was pretty interesting. You know me, I was all into the back story of the bears and why they were relocated (mostly because humans fed them and the "naturalist" who worked there was VERY bitter about the human ignorance on that social problem!) and also caught up in keeping Brock OFF the fences that kept the humans from becoming the food the bears would eat. We lucked out to see a half hour presentation on birds of prey which was about 28 minutes too long for el-Brock-o, but since we had sat on the front row we were on strict orders not to move or wave our arms. That whole situation proved pretty stressful. One of the owls "baited" [flapped its wings] and Caylee about had a coronary. Between my OBVIOUS city kids and the naturalist's LACK of personality the presentation is clearly 30 minutes of my life I will be frustrated to never get back. HOWEVER, the birds were interesting and, again, I dug the back story on why they were removed from the wild to live in West Yellowstone.

(Here's the "We're So Scared of the Wolves" picture, Caylee's idea)

We headed back to the cabin after gorging on ice cream and then visited throughout the evening. Monday morning Tyler was up before dawn to get a good mornings' worth of fishing in and the rest of us started packing up. (Hmmmm, I think this fishing hobby provides Tyler with MANY levels of happiness since he seems to miss the packing back up/cleaning on several of our trips.) Anyway, I climbed into the little attic space and found Marsha playing McDonalds with just Brock. He couldn't be more tickled. He kept asking her if she was his friend and about her Bomp-pa (translation- Grandpa/husband). I think he wanted proof that she really was a grandma, but how could he doubt after she would climb up there and make him hamburgers and hotdogs with play food for quite a while? Marsha's daughter, Megan, is having their first grandson in August and I have no doubt that even the baby won't have ruffles and lace, Grandma Marsha will have a GREAT time with him too.

Then it was time to leave and we had to get a shot from the porch

And one with Marsha and her entourage. She's so popular.

Before we left for Idaho Falls to drop the boys off at the airport, Marsha too us to her favorite Island Park spot to feed the fish. It was gorge-e-or-geous and the seagulls were pretty entertaining. We also saw the fattest rainbow trout just chillin' and some ducks, pelicans, and even a muskrat (nasty long tail trailing that thing!) Here's some of the wild things we saw over the weekend:

One of the things we wanted to do on our way back south was to stop at the temple grounds to see some of the temples in the areas we were driving through. First up was Rexburg where my kids said, "It's so nice that Jesus has such a big lawn." They're quite smitten with grass. We let the kids kick off their shoes and play around (yes, I don't know how reverent that is, but it has become a common theme at our stops.) Brevin, of course, cuts his lip open in a game of Red Rover. Bets are that's not going to be his first bloody accident this trip.

We loaded up the kids and moved onto the Idaho Falls temple and wandered around there for a bit. Caylee was SOOO having an attitude and refused to get out of the car so Tyler decided he'd stay in the car with her . . . that worked until he teased her so badly that she decided ANYTHING was better than staying in the car with "your husband that is so annoying to me" (which is how she explained her joining me walking around.) There was a visitor's center, which was so convenient for our bathroom needs . . . until the fire alarm went off. Luckily, after a headcount we knew it wasn't any of our kids who pulled the trigger, but we vacated promptly anyway and headed to an authentic mexican restaurant.

But instead ended up at Chili's. Tyler was so bugged that we didn't find a real dive, but Erin and I were relieved we weren't going to have any stomach rebellions on our drive to Burley/Albion after we dropped the menfolk off at the airport. Fighting the crowds at the Idaho Falls airport was a beast, but we survived even that and one showing of Madagascar 2 later we were exiting the freeway looking for a Wal-Mart to stock up for the next couple days. {*SIDE NOTE* Madagascar 2 is THE best movie to listen to in the car. I laugh at more and more of the dialogue EVERY time the kids watch it. I would be hard-pressed to pick my favorite line. Just to let you know.}

Since our bearings were a little off, Erin and I had gotten off at different freeway exit than we had planned and we were trying to figure out WHERE the heck we were and HOW to find the stinkin' Wal-Mart when I realized that I had flashing police lights behind me. And yes, it was that oh-crap-is-that-for-me-oh-sh!!!!t-it-totally-is-and-I'm-on-the-phone-and-on-a-bridge-and-where-do-I-pull-over-? moment. I got off the phone and pulled into some parking lot and a really nice Heyburn policeman came up to me.

Policeman: "Evening." Me (before he can even finish his greeting): "Was I speeding? I was probably totally speeding. I don't even know where I am. I was talking to my sister. We're trying to find Wal-Mart and we got off on the wrong freeway exit. I totally don't even know what the speed limit is." Policeman: "Yeah, well, I got ya at 47 is a 35. It's 35 right through the center of town." Me: "Yeah, I believe it, I guess, I was just lookin' for Wal-Mart." {Okay, my kids are silently FREAKING out that I'm going to get arrested. AND I am pretty sure that's a huge speed trap since Heyburn's center of town is literally a blink.} Policeman: "Alright, well, let's have your license and stuff and then I'll tell you how to get to Wal-Mart." {At this point I remember I KNOW I don't have current proof of registration (a fact we realized on our way north last week) and then I had to get out to dig through our glove compartment to find a current registration only to realize that we had 3 receipts for our trailer and NONE for my actual car. So, to recap: me, 5 buckled kids, with license, NO current insurance proof, and NO registration proof. I was a rambling idiot (as explained by my mouth diarrhea above) and when I finally looked at the kids Brevin was almost in tears so I just told them to all pray. And it must have worked because I was let go with a warning AND directions to Wal-Mart. It was very nerve-wracking.

We made it to the Marsh Creek Inn and slept in (which we all needed) and then spent a lot of yesterday be-bopping around Burley and Albion. We first toured Aunt Randy and Uncle Dan's home that they are building (with their very own two hands) and then had lunch at . . . wait . . .wait. . . listen for the angels singing . . . TACO BANDITO!!!! WHICH, you have to love small towns since I walked right in and saw our former neighbors, Ron and Carol Bench, sitting right in the front of the restaurant. I made them take a picture with us. Afterwards we went to the cemetery to put flowers on my grandparents grave (happy b-day Hazel) and my Aunt Dode's too. Then we took the kids to Storybook Park where the kids ran around and Erin and I tried to recover from our bandito overload. Caylee, of course, my social butterfly, made two new friends within minutes. The kids ran and swung and climbed and slid and then we took them to Randy and Dan's to do it some more, after a quick stop by King's to get some necessary un-necessary stuff (more candy, a toy snake, a package of policeman paraphernalia, and lipgloss . . . and more candy).

By the end of yesterday we were all tuckered out, but managed to stop at the local Albion cafe for dinner. It was mighty fine and just around the corner from the hotel. We quickly bathed and bedded and Disney TV-ed them so Erin and I could soak in some internet goodness. Finally, at 2:30am we called it another successful day of vacation and dreamt of Shoshone Falls and getting to the townhouse in Utah.

I-da-ho

2009-06-16T23:33:00.000-07:00

So, to keep track of our super duper family vacation, I’m going to try and blog as much as possible so ONE day I will print it all out and we’ll have a record of all the screaming and fighting and whining . . . er, I mean a record of all the wonderful memories we had on this family va-cay.

Tyler worked a full day on Thursday and my goal was to get out the door by 5:15pm that night to drive up to Pleasant Grove. A mere three hours past my target time we were finally rolling down I-15. Of all the things I DID get done on Thursday before we left (family pictures and a doctor’s visit) I DID also manage to clear all the old Oprah’s off my DVR and I forgot to print off Tyler’s confirmation for his flight home. I know, I know despite the DVR travesty we were able to travel pretty well through the night. Tyler was an excellent driver and as much as I insisted I didn’t really sleep on the car ride, somehow I’d dose off at 10:15pm and the next time I’d look at the clock it’d be 11:23pm. As far as trips go, I thought it went pretty quickly and by 3:29am (MST) we were all bedded and sleeping at Tyler’s fabulous Aunt Karen’s house.

LUCKY for us our kids were such great sleepers in the car on the way up that they were great early-risers (well, considering our mid-middle-o-the-night bedtime). Once Aunt Karen was done teaching yoga we had a yummy breakfast with her and her kids and we all visited for a bit. Of course, Caylee made a friend at Aunt Karen’s house and was ready to stay for the two weeks to play with her and all my other kids ran after the poor cats in the neighborhood until we left around 11am. We drove on up north until North Ogden when we called, totally spur of the moment, and bamboozled Tyler’s Aunt and Uncle Dunkley to join us for lunch. Since Tyler has a “no restaurant chain” policy on our road trips we ate at Maddox in Williard, UT and then pushed on to Idaho. {Thanks again for lunch Ralph and Diana! It was fun to see you.}

And gosh, ID is gorgeous. I was driving looking at the mountains and hills and GREEN and wondered why don’t I live in such a pretty place? Then I imagined what it all looked like cold and frozen and snowy . . . probably not so cute. BUT, I really enjoyed myself on the drive. I even snapped some pictures (at which point I got a lecture from Caylee on safe driving) until we stopped in Blackfoot, ID to join up with my sister and her family at the Idaho Potato Museum. Ahhh, yeah, ma people, you’ll want to put it on your itinerary . . . only if it’s “free day,” which it was (I know, how lucky are we?) Uncle Kevin explained to all of us that spontaneous stops are what family vacations are all about. And now we know all about mashers, what makes a perfect potato, and have seen a dress made from burlap for a rodeo queen. Nice!

This is so you can tell how excited Tyler is about the museum!

We drove on to Rexburg and it was a treat as we stopped to eat dinner and let the kids run off some of their pent-up car-ness. Erin had made these super cool Bingo games for the ride up and all I listened to from Idaho Falls to Rexburg was Brock whining that he just wanted a treat without a Bingo, so, in all truthfulness, maybe I was the one that needed some fresh air and space. We enjoyed the park and dinner before stocking up for the weekend with groceries and goodies.

Then it was off to Island Park. There’s not many more beautiful drives I’ve taken than this drive, especially since this year we made it right at sunset. And Marsha’s cabin is spectacular. We truly invaded her and she’s shown us nothing but the best hospitality. Oh, and patience. When, for the umpteenth time this morning Caylee whined that she was bored, it was Marsha that busted out bubble wands . . . then toys . . . then an art set to appease her. We all sat around and visited all afternoon about nothing while the kids played outside and then watched movies. Tyler, of course, spent the day on the river LOVING the fly-fishing and then picked up the little boys to take them fishing for a bit. We had a yummy pizza dinner and then took the kids on a walk where Brock held his first earthworm and antagonized the girls with it. Oh, and he pee’ed on the side of the road while the mosquitoes feasted on his hind-end. And tonight we are finishing up with a good late-night chat.

(in the attic hideout where the girls slept)

(how cute is Marsha? This was our welcome sign!)

(on my afternoon walk in the rain)

(success!)

(family walk. The girls freaked out over all the mosquitos and Tyler's head got eaten up since he refused the bug spray.)

(Can you tell Tyler and I are impressed with Brock's stream?)

I cannot say enough about Marsha's hospitality and goodness this weekend. It has reminded me a lot of the hours and hours Erin and I would spend at her house when we were little playing with Megan. I so wish Marsha's kids and hubby could have come this weekend, although I totally understand we're not the biggest draw (too many screamin' kids!) I just really appreciate all Marsha's love and support for me (and our family) for as long as I've known her. We're just lucky to know her.

Not so Well Check

2009-06-10T01:08:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd chronicle my most recent shining moment of motherhood. As a parent of five small ones our "well-checks" are part of our routine and if I'm lucky I can schedule several checks at once. On Briggs official first birthday, at the end of April, I took him to see our favorite pediatrician for his once over and some shots. Briggs had been fussy and onry for a couple days before his check-up, but once we got there he was all smiles and roses.

We got all his weights and measures (average for his length, below average for weight, and big head) and his anxiety immediately increased once he knew I was going to be letting other people get close to him. He's in that strangers-freak-me-out-I-only-want-my-mom-stage.

Well, long story short, Briggs was not-s0-well at year 1. In fact he had an ear infection and a nasty upper respiratory. And that called for no shots, an antibiotic, a breathing treatment, and a FABULOUS breathing machine for the Barlow household.

That's right, after a decade of kids we're the proud owners of a nebulizer. Sweet. Briggs was pretty thrilled, too. Can't you tell.

Here's Briggs being scarred in the name of the scrapbook.

And since I am sure y'all want the update, THAT ear infection cleared and he's had two more since. That's right. The past 5 weeks he's had 3 infections. We'll be going to see an ENT for tubes when we get back fro va-cay in a couple weeks.

*But really! How cute is he in all these bawling pics?!*

Birthday Celebrations

2009-06-07T20:49:00.000-07:00

I have been so bad about updating my blog . . . I know, right!? When I looked through at what blogs I could print out to send to my brother I realized I hadn't really blogged too much in the entire month of May. Well, most of it anyway. I'm so impressed with those who can post daily, or even daily-ish. Tyler even just said, "Do you even blog anymore?" Facebook is just so much more instant and I feel like I can still get my voyeuristic thrills on all y'all.

BUT since this is also our little family record that I print and binder for all posterity I thought I'd note that 3/5 of my kids had birthdays some time within the past 6 weeks. First, Briggs turned one. I did write about how he had grown over the year, but here's some pictures of his party we had a week or so after his actual birthday (sorry, Briggs, but when you're the 5th kid, your brother's t-ball game trumps a birthday party with the family on your actual big day. I'm so glad you survived the trauma, though!) I was surprised when we had all the family over from both sides that there were SO MANY PEOPLE! Poor Tyler was stuck on the grill for quite a bit while we all enjoyed his skillz. The cousins ran around like madmen/women and then we finished off an entire sheet cake from Sam's . . . and those things are huge (okay, it was a half sheet, but still, it was big.) It took Briggs a while to really dig into his cake, but then he messed himself up pretty well. I'd have to say his favorite gift was the dum dum suckers from the Mohlers . . . pretty much made his night.

Then Caylee turned 7. And wouldn't you know it, all her tantrums and fits magically quit. Oh, wait, that was my wish when she blew out her candles .. . since it wasn't my birthday it must not have come true. Dang. My girls were all set with their birthday plans as soon as April hit since the rule is no party-planning/discussing until the month previous to the actual birthday. (Seriously, am I the only mom who goes crazy with the ba-dillion plans that are made and remade and remade throughout the year?) The girls BOTH wanted a Hawaiian luau swim party and they BOTH wanted it right by their birthdays so they got a joint birthday party. It took some persuading for Mackenzie to get on board (I mean, I really ruined her cool by making her have her party with her kid sister), but by party time they were both excited. They had lots of friends and thanks to the YW fundraiser for our ward they scored pizza to eat. We had a pinata and they even both invited boys (who weren't cousins) to their party . . . is that a milestone? I dunno. At one point there were 27 kids in the pool. Yikes, right?! Everyone was still alive when their parents got there so the party was a complete success . . .oh and the girls LOVED their goodies from their friends, so they were thought it was a smash too.

Since the girls' party was after their actual birthdays, Mom and Dad gave our gifts on their actual birthday. Caylee got a much needed bike and much asked-for underwear (no, I didn't get that backwards. The silly girl REALLY wanted new panties.) Kenzie got an ipod charger and bras. (yes, that will completely embarrass her that I "recorded" that for posterity . . . and for the internet.)

I probably don't say enough how grateful I am for my kids. It IS a little tricky to fit that in in between all my complaining, griping, and eye-rolling that my motherhood job does. BUT I love my kids. They are, simply, wonderful and I DO like them. (I really am not convincing myself; I really do organically feel that!) Mackenzie and I have some great laughs and I can't believe what a little woman she is becoming. Part of her birthday gift is a scrapbook of the past 10 years with her and it's been pretty great for me to reminisce about how she's impacted my life. And Caylee is really all heart. She's my most dedicated fan and my biggest challenge, but I'm thankful for her example and love EVERY day. Her personality has been entertaining and I look forward to watching her continue to come into her own. And Briggs, well, he's ma heart! I can't squeeze him enough. The past year has gone so fast and I'm sure this one will too. Before I know it they'll be 11, 8, and 2 . . . Wild!

Welcome Summer Vacation

2009-06-05T15:53:00.000-07:00

Popsicles, Swimming, Lounging Around

Bring it on Summertime!

{Post script. How is this not self-explanatory? This is my son, post-swimming, enjoying a popsicle in his carseat. Who wants to ride home in a wet suit? Not him . . . it would ruin the joy of the summer fun.}

How do you describe a really good cake?

2009-05-26T23:18:00.000-07:00

I can't remember when it all started. Perhaps it was when I was 6 and learned the "oi" sound. Perhaps it was when I reached the pubescent age . . . and so did my friends and classmates and there were odiferous emissions from certain teenage body parts. Maybe it was when I had time to think about things that really bug me. I s'pose when doesn't really matter, but somewhere along the line I discovered I really hate the world "MOIST."

Ew. Just writing it makes me cringe. Really. I kinda vomit a little in my mouth any time I hear someone say it. And let me explain why.

Words have meaning. The word moist means: damp, humid, soggy, wet, clammy, tacky. Fine. There is a couple of situations were "moist" is appropriate and it doesn't really offend me. For example: the weather. Sometimes there is moisture in the air and it is fine to note so (like the time one of our friends said during the church opening prayer for my benefit, "We thank the for the moist . . . for the moisture." And yes, I shuddered when he said moist, but conceded that his use of moisture was appropriate considering the summer monsoons we had been having that year.) Another time when "moist" is fitting: when talking about dark, dank places . . . and that could mean bodily places OR creepy, icky basements. I mean, really, people. We all know crotches, armpits, and basement corners are "moist." Gross, right!? Nothing good comes with the word moist. Moist underwear = bad. Moist carpet = vomit. Moist shower = mold. Moist armpits = humidity. Moist air = rain (okay, I already said this one isn't as offensive, but still.) It's not a word we should say.

BUT WE DO!!! If we can all agree on the meaning of "moist," then why do people insist on calling food "moist"? There are plenty of words to describe a really delicious cake. There ya go, I just gave you a replacement word, "delicious." or "decadent." or "delightful." (It doesn't have to start with a "d" either.) If a cake is good, we all know it's good tasting AND the texture is great. We don't have to differentiate. When's the last time you had a cake that was good enough to make you comment, "This cake is SOO good; I think this cake is perfect; I am normally not a cake person, but I would eat this whole thing; BUT THE CAKE IS FALLING APART DRY." !!!!???? You don't say that EV-VER!! Let the "This cake is SOO good; I think this cake is perfect; I am normally not a cake person, but I could eat this whole thing" stand alone. Why must people then say, "AND THE CAKE IS SO MOIST!" ???????? That is like an oxymoron. A cake is not moist. Because a soggy, damp, tacky cake would be NASTY. As nasty as the word MOIST.

Anyway, this aversion to the "M" word is a common known issue with me. So much so that my friends Leslie and Melissa thought it would be worth their money to purchase this beauty from their local Walgreens:

And yes, Melissa tied a ribbon around it a la Relief Society. That's how you know you have good friends. They buy you stuff that they know will make you gag and then literally present it at family history club. I love 'em.

{And PLEASE do not let me go on about the disgusting nature of this dog treat. Puke Me People!} I know I'm not alone in this. I can't be. In fact, when pressed on this issue, I have never had someone tell me a way to use the word "moist" that explains something good . . . logically. Like I said, CAKE should NOT be described as MOIST because of what MOIST really means. (Anyone work for Duncan Hines . . . I think they have a moist brand of cake mixes.) Can anyone tell me of anything good that is moist? Anyone? Crickets? Thank you! Let's stop this nonsense. Nast. Nasty. {{Shiver}}

Won't you be my neighbor?

2009-05-13T23:24:00.000-07:00

There is a private drive located off of Pecos, I believe (here in Vegas) and I remember driving by it in my brother-in-law's red mini van (when we were younger; before he was my BIL). There were maybe 6 or 7 houses on this gated street and we'd all talk about how cool it would be to grow up and live on that street with your best friends living right next door. (Of course Kevin always called dibs on the big house at the end of the street.)

Seriously! Do you ever pretend you could design your own street/neighborhood/ward of people you REALLY like and want to be closer to? Sometimes I think it'd be WONDERFUL to have a neighborhood where my kids could run free and have an assundry of friends to pick from who live RIGHT NEXT DOOR. A neighborhood kinda like Leave it To Beaver where the kids could play baseball in the street and the neighbors would think it was cute and fun to have the kids in the front; not bugged that they were playing outside. I know not everyone's perfect, but in my neighborhood we'd love everyone complete with their flaws and it's ALL GOOD. Trust me, I'm imagining quite the dynamic neighborhood of goodness. Probably a little reminiscent of the old Burley neighborhood I grew up in, but with my peeps (however the Nelson clan is good peeps, so they'd probably be invited to my 'hood.) I dunno, a neighborhood where my kids would have some options when they want to "run away" or when I angrily kick them out the front door for being so stinkin' onry. It'd be great to know they'll end up at Barb's or Nancee's or Chris' or my sister's house and not picked up by some random stranger who'd report me to social services.

I would love this situation so then, when my friends have babies, they would come to their homes right around the corner from my house and I could run over to their house and hold their baby while they shower OR call and say, "send your other kid(s) over here for the day while you nap and sniff your new baby." And then, in my dream neighborhood, I could help my friends more and share with them more and learn about them and their spouses more and appreciate them more and . . . basically soak in their goodnesses. When they'd have good news we'd ALL celebrate with goodies, but then we could all work out together the next morning since my neighborhood would have miles of wonderful walking paths where we could burn of calories whilst we counsel each other. One of the best parts would be seeing my friends from college become friends with the gals I love in my current ward. OR my old ward friends really getting along with my family. And if, heaven forbid, there'd be a tragedy we could support and help each other. Because I, for one, have a ton of wheat for when the world falls apart and a generator big enough to run our house's power, but I KNOW in my dream neighborhood SOMEONE would share their water with me. (AND B.T.W., thanks Mindy for the water barrel heads up at Wal-Mart . . .you may now be invited to my 'hood!)

Then, as time goes by, our little kids would transition to teenagers and we moms and dads could be a team of cool, loving, stern, but fun adults for all our kids. And the kids could all date each other (or just hang out if they want) and I'd be excited just at the prospect that I could be actually related to some of my friends if our kids actually married [totally after missions and college, etc.]! (OBVIOUSLY I'd want some family to be in my neighborhood, but feel I should make it clear that I would not think the relatives dating would be so cool; that would be incest-y and that's gross. Plus I'm already related to the relatives, so no need to be all excited that we could be more related . . . anyway, you know what I mean. My kids dating my friends kids = cute.) Trust me, I know this neighborhood would be fun. Totally compound-ish, maybe, BUT we'd all love it so much I think we'd even want to vacation together too! Don't get me started on those plans.

Not that I even think the neighborhood would be perfect. I'm sure there'd be sorrow and struggles and problems, BUT I know these people are the best out there and my neighborhood would rally around each other. We'd lift each other up. We could help, not hurt. We'd laugh, oh my gosh! We'd laugh ourselves skinny because my peeps are funny. Like, it'd be funny to hear someone else yell at their kids through their shut windows or as their loading their kids into the car for church. It'd be a community when you could yell, "SERIOUSLY I will beat you bloody if you poke your star wars character into your sister's scriptures again!" and those who heard you would either wave like you hadn't just threatened physical violence OR shout a back up threat just to help you out. I'm telling you people, it'd be fun. Don't you think? C'mon, don't you want to be a neighbor? How could it be much better?

Wonderful Women Wednesday

2009-05-13T22:58:00.001-07:00

The other day as I was thinking, I thunked, "I should record something about the various women who've impacted my life." There's lots of men, too, but particularly women who have affected me and changed the course of my life. Mostly I am grateful for them. Generally, I'm pretty sure that my "experiences" with them have barely blipped on their radar. In an effort, though, to record more of my thunking, I think I'll try and use Wednesdays to reflect on some of those women. There will be no particular order to my thoughts (I know, not a big shocker there), so please nobody take offense if I don't get a chance to acknowledge your contribution in my life until the year 2056. (And yes, to Tyler's chagrin, I hope to be blogging when I'm that old.)

Tonight I'd like to thank the blond woman who dropped her kids off at the precise moment I dropped my kids off about two and a half years ago at LVAC's gym. I don't know her name. I only talked to her that one morning and perhaps one other time in a brief passing in the locker room, but somehow I felt we were kindred spirits. I was in a particular funk about my body and my overwhelming ONLY-A-MOM life with four small kids, saggy boobs, and a big butt as my main accomplishments. Since we had been religiously been paying on my gym membership, but had only used my membership about ten times in two years, I thought I'd work up the gumption to try it again. BUT, of course, getting my three kids TO the gym was a huge feat; having it go flawlessly was another story. Brock, at the time a baby, was not so into the random strangers who took him from his mother's flabby arms and he was scream/crying as I walked out of the daycare door to walk to the members' entrance.

I must have sighed or something. Maybe I was crying, or fighting back the tears, at least. I probably had peanut butter wiped across my forehead or a cheerio smashed on my backside. Somehow I projected a neediness to this blond, fit, shorter-than-me (but, really, who isn't) mom. She had a gym bag over her shoulder and I remember the compassion that lathered over me when she asked, "Is this his first time to the daycare here?" Kinda caught off guard I just volunteered our entire gym history (which, remember, it was pretty short). I think I finished with something like, "It's just so hard and I need it to be easy," and she said these life-changing words, "Okay, what you do is the next time you're at Wal-Mart get yourself a lock. Then pack a gym back with everything you'd need to shower and get cleaned up. You can book that daycare for two hours, so spend your first hour working out and then go get showered and cleaned up for the day. At least this way you know they're not opening up everything in your pantry while you're trying to get cleaned up."

For some reason her advice resonated with me and my experiences at the gym became vastly better. Sure, Brock still cried and sometimes I forgot to make the appointment or something annoying like a poopy diaper pulled me away from my workout. BUT more often then not I could go workout and get changed and ready for my day. It wasn't that what she said was profound, but her calm, together attitude really influenced me to see that it was possible to take care of my kids AND to take care of myself.

So, thanks, lady. I don't know who you are and I could be blow drying my hair right next to you and I probably wouldn't even know, but I'm grateful for you speaking to a completely frazzled stranger. And yes, more often then not I will pack my gym back and get it all done before I have to go be ONLY-A-MOM (still with saggy boobs, but with less of a butt . . . thanks to HER!)

Baby making season

2009-05-11T12:50:00.000-07:00

Just thought I'd share this little moment from yesterday's car ride home after church. I asked Mackenzie if they sang to her in primary since her birthday is this week. She said they did sing to her and some of the adults had commented that it must be a busy week at our house since they had already sung to Caylee in Jr. primary which meant two birthdays in our family this week. Mackenzie then told me she explained that her and Caylee's birthdays are three days apart in May and then Brevin's and Brock's are three days apart in September. She seemed pretty pleased with herself for sharing all that with the Sr. primary so then I told her she needed to conclude (the next time that subject ever came up) that "my mom is just super organized like that." She kinda nodded and grinned at that statement. Then I said, "or you could just tell everyone that your mom only makes babies two times a year." Mackenzie hardly ever blushes, but apparantly Mom randomly bringing up reproduction on the car ride home from church does the trick. The we got a pretty good case of the giggles. Can't wait for next year when we can talk about the "maturation" course she gets!

Laptop OVERLOAD

2009-05-10T21:40:00.000-07:00

I know, it's a shocker. I am actually blogging. But here's the rub; I will not be blogging about much of substance. Blech. I know. You might as well go check someone else's blog. There's plenty clever, witty, inspiring things out there on the internet and I LOVE them. However, I'm finding that it gives me a bit of a blogging complex if I don't have pictures or links or, heaven forbid, a super positive thing to say.

So, here's my deal. EVERY time I open my computer to "do" something I have all these choices I have to make. Email? Girls' camp program writing? Mackenzie's decade scrapbook? Blogging? Facebooking? Facebook album updating? Facebook discussion group threading? Picture organizing? Online ordering? AAAHHHHH! The pressure, I tell you. I have a lot to write about, just for record-keepings sake. I have super cute pictures I'd love to share. I also have a scrapbook project I need to finish before Mackenzie's 10th birthday (which would be WEDNESDAY!) and today, since it was mother's day and all, I busted out an old scrapbook project I was working on for Tyler's mom. I am on to myself, though, I know all my "projects" are ways of procrastinating. And what REALLY annoys me about myself is that I have all the normal stuff to do like laundry and dishes and cleaning and tending to the offspring and to do that leaves me with this impending doom-ish feeling of all the "projects" I have to get done. Yes, those projects that I have created for myself. It's weird and messed up, I realize that. Here's the real doosie, though. I cannot stay off facebook. PLEASE my people. I am about to ground myself for a week from facebook, but I know I will "sneak" a peak here and there. The brain-numbing act of reading status updates has me completely hooked. Oh, dear, and if there be a thread of funny comments or anything, I'm a gonner. SOOO, then I'm really behind. All of this entire previous paragraph has probably been a lot of "waaa waa waa waa waa waa." Sorry. Workin' it out. Aren't you sorry you didn't click on someone more clever already?

Not that I should sound like I am complaining, because, let's face it, my laptop is supposed to be fun, a luxery even, and compared to the other travesties going on in the world, I have it pretty cush. However, sitting in front of my laptop tonight, perusing all the super sweet facebook Mother's Day wishes and then reading the make-me-weep posts on others' blogs I realized two things: 1. Sometimes Mother's Day is crappy. I mean, it can start out great and it can be muddled through and faked through, but then, by the end of it, one can be in a pretty funked out place about the whole holiday and 2. I have completely whacked out expectations, which is a bad habit to have in the first place, but add some hormones into it all and VOILA I have a good dose of anxiety. And I'm blaming it all on my Laptop.

Where has the year gone?

2009-04-28T12:30:00.000-07:00

A year ago today I was waiting to be discharged from the hospital to go home to be with my family, full of FIVE kids. I think I was mostly grateful to be home, probably a little overwhelmed, completely grateful to be unpregnant, and anxious to see how life as a mom of five kids was going to be. How fast this year has gone! Out of necessity I got my feet under me (although I have had a lot of stumbling this past year) and we've survived. Yay us!

I know I kinda talked about this already, but I am so grateful for Briggs. Just today I was talking to my sister who was solo while our kids had preschool and I thought, "mmm, that could have been me if we hadn't had Briggs last year" since Brock would have been our baby and he's now 3 1/2. But I would have not have it any other way. Briggs is such a light in my life and I'm glad I have a little buddy to pal around with. I notice a lot more of the milestones (like getting to the "pull every book off the shelves" stage) than I did with Brock (who I thought was my last.) I definitely recognize he's our baby and treat him as such. He makes me laugh with the way he plays coy and when he tries to wrestle with his brothers. He is a mover and a shaker . . . likes to be on the go and doesn't sit still.

So, here's a recap of my little man:

1 month

Briggs ate all the time, which left me sore and sleepless. He wasn't very good at the bottle and I spent a small fortune trying to find one he'd be adept at drinking from. Briggs slept better swaddled, but with his arms out around his face.

2 month

Briggs began sleeping long stints in the night earlier than any of my other kids (gratefully.) He found his hands this month, and that pacified him since he did not appreciate the binky. We took him to Montana with us and he was a champ on the trip as much as he was every day while being carted around while I ran my errands. The only time he gets overly cranky was at bedtime and if he had gone too long without a poopy diaper (which was becoming an issue.) When he's not cranky he gives us plenty of smiles.

3 month

Poor Briggs had to travel to Utah 3 times in 3 weeks for trips that the family took and he was awesome. I'd pump milk for him while I was driving (yes, I know, not safe) and Mackenzie would feed him a bottle. He would not drink formula, but I was still having issues with nursing Briggs. I would have stopped in month 3, but Briggs had tears this month and that was too sad to not continue with the boob torture. My niece, Brooklyn, started her love affair with "Baby Briggs" when we did our Provo trip with the kids this month. Briggs really put on some weight this month.

4 month

By this month Briggs had officially became my best baby sleeper. He'd sleep for 8 hours straight, have a little bottle and go back down for another couple hours. Even better was he'd put himself to sleep once he found his fists. Briggs would sit up propped up, but ended up with bubbles and drool all over himself when he was vertical. He's definitely ticklish and loves it when Caylee sits by him in the car because she makes him smile so much. He started to babble a lot more, like he'd discovered his voice.

5 month

Sleeping got better this month when he started going to bed with the other kids and he still slept through the night. He tried really hard to roll over and by the end of the month he finally did it. He would push himself around while on his back and rubbed a gnarly bald spot in the back of his head. I'll find him turned and licking the leather on the couch if we leave him to his own amusement. This month, too, I noticed when we get in the car in the morning Briggs was REALLY vocal, like over the chaos in the car I could hear him babbling. We took Briggs to Swiss Days with us and I was grateful for all the help from everyone so I could enjoy the trip. When Briggs gets really excited he bangs his fists on his sides and I had to stop him so he wouldn't bruise himself.

6 month

I tried rice cereal with Briggs this month. He literally shuttered. Briggs really liked sucking on his blanket tags and likes coughing to get people's attention. When he'd get really tired he'd shake his head from side to side. I started taking Briggs to the gym and he did really well why he was there. He also started reaching out more and playing with the toys that were placed in front of him or grabbing my hair.

7 month

Briggs started eating baby food, but he's not cooperating much with formula, STILL! Briggs started cutting teeth at the end of this month and I kept taking him into the Dr. because I knew he was sick, but nope. He wasn't. With the extra saliva, Briggs has started spitting/making raspberries. He likes: playing in the jumperoo, the activity center, biting the brim of Tyler's caps, and scooting (backwards while on his tummy and forwards while on his back). As the 5th kid, Briggs has learned that screaming gets a quicker reaction than gentle fussing.

8 month
Baby food is helping to supplement the nursing and I'm finally to the pump and dump stage of nursing. Briggs discovered straws, open mouth kisses, a big boy carseat, two teeth, Duck Creek, and the "Polar Express" train ride. This month Briggs had his first real fever. He was pretty miserable and his sleeping suffered, which meant so did ours :) One Sunday Briggs went to give Brock and open-mouth kiss and right at his face, Briggs spit all over Brock's face.

9 month

Yes, weening was hard and traumatic, but I was O-V-E-R it and it wasn't worth the infections and . . . blech. OVER it! In my mind I only nursed for a few months with Briggs, but I guess it's longer. We put Briggs on soy formula to help with his regularity, and who knows if it helps or not, but he seems to be more regular. This month Briggs has began to push himself up on all fours and making the loud raspberries spitting sound for long periods of time (like for 30 min. straight during church.) He says, "dadadadada" and prefers to be off our laps and in the same room with the other kids. He also got a couple more teeth this month.

10 month
Briggs is loving the baby food. Textures make him gag. While he likes a good nap or two a day in his bed, he's also been a great cat-napper. Now that Briggs is crawling, he's finding all sorts of goodies on the floor. He really likes to reach up and touch things and and try to catch up to where the other kids are. In Relief Society we have quite the cadre of little babies crawling all over sharing/taking toys. It's sweet. Probably my favorite thing is watching Briggs kiss the mirror in our bathroom as he watches his reflection. He's bunked his head a good number of times doing that. A couple more bottom teeth this month. And can you tell I don't like to sit still?

11 month
This month Briggs has begun to wave "bye-bye" and point at his nose, well, usually it's at his ears, but we give him credit for the general area. Briggs does not like strangers talking to him and he rarely will smile for people outside of our family. Because his bright blue eyes, people stop and talk to him all the time and he just stares at them. He's getting two more teeth on the top this month and he's started throwing tantrums when we take away something he's playing with (especially remotes or cell phones.) He likes to crawl into the pantry and into the kids' playhouse that's in the living room. He loves playing peek-a-boo and sleeping on his tummy, but NOT loud noises. When Tyler gets home he'll say "DA!" but that's the only thing he seems to say.

12 month

Briggs still likes to get around, but more than usual he likes to make a mess. He pulls out all the plastic-ware lids and the books off my shelf. We moved him from his sisters' room to the boys' room this month and he's got another cold (which we since found out is an ear infection and respiratory virus . . . he was not-so-well at his well check.) This month he has developed a good dose of stranger anxiety, but seems to do okay (so far) at the gym. He has been a good stroller-er which is handy for all Brevin's t-ball games. He gets excited when Tyler gets home from work and seems to recognize his brothers and sisters by name. He's doing better with food textures and he really likes pizza.

It's been a year of joy and happiness with this baby boy. We're blessed to have him in the family. Happy birthday, Briggs!

When the Nightengale Sings

2009-04-21T00:40:00.000-07:00

There is a bird that lives near my house that sings at night. I don't really know what kind of bird it is, but when I am up late at night I hear it chirp, chirp, chirping and I really like it. Since it's been so nice the past few nights, our windows have been open and since I have had the joy of being up late laundering, I have really appreciated the company. Me and the nightengale (or some species like unto it.)

Tonight I went with some girlfriends to see 17 Again. I enjoy Zac Efron. Apparantly more when he's playing the part of a high schooler than when he plays the part of a grown man in a high schooler's body. It kinda made me nervous when the high schooler was trying to make out with the mom or the daughter was growling at him. I dunno if I just spoiled the whole movie, but overall I enjoyed it and the funny sidekick friend made the show.

Anyway, because my Coke Zero will now keep me up for awhile until I force myself to bed in 15 minutes, I thought I'd actually post. It's better than washing more blankets and outerware from our fun camping trip to Coral Pink with my sister and her in-law family. (More on that to come one day . . . or I'll just link you to her blog when she does up her whamdy-dandy post that she does every year. Which reminds me. I need to send her pics. ANYWAY)

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. A lot of pondering. I will concede that it's one of the blessings of going to the gym, more thinking time. I have had some particularly interesting conversations lately, celebrated a very personal Easter this year, have re-thought about our church's General Conference this spring more than I normally do, and I have been thinking about my family and my friends a lot. Somehow, all these things bring me back to myself and where I am in my life. I think it's interesting to reflect on how my expectations of where I would be today are completely different than where I really am. This happens consistently in my life. I'll project about my future and then once arriving there, I'll look back and see how truly off I apparantly was. I used to think it was annoying and preturbing to have a plan (or, in my family we call it, a vision) and then have something totally "screw" it up and voila! I'm in the middle of someone else's plan . . . not the one I had scripted so well a while before.

In one week Briggs will turn one year old. I canNOT believe how quickly the time has passed and how much his little presence has changed my life. It's not really a secret that Briggs' pregnancy wasn't planned. In fact, regretably, I made it very clear in the beginning weeks of my 5th pregnancy that I was irritated/frustrated/saddened/overwhelmed by the whole "debaucle." And I say "regretably" because I can recognize all those emotions were stemming from me being all bent out of shape that "my vision" of moving to the next stage; of getting back to teaching in a couple of years; of non-baby life was not going to work out. It wasn't until I almost lost Briggs with a placental hematoma that I was humbled enough to remember that as much as I have "my vision" it's really more about HIS plan. And it was God's plan to send me one more precious little boy. It was a gift that I didn't know I needed. In fact, I was ready to return the gift at first . . . maybe exchange it for a present that I thought I would be better, like Tyler getting another raise or something more shallow and immediate. I'm pretty sure I shared this before, but my mom gave me a quote when I found out I was expecting from Richard G. Scott that talks about how sacrificing our desires and genuinely meaning 'thy will be done' brings a power and blessing to us that is beyond ourselves. That has been so abundantly clear to me the past year. Granted, being pregnant is a pretty easy thing to throw your hands up in the air and say, "well, whatever, thy will be done, apparantly!!!" but I do know that when I sincerely began to believe that, I did feel my life was blessed. I do know that all the things I worried about by bringing one more spirit into our family are small in comparison of the knowledge that I will have an eternity of blessings by being Briggs' mother. I do know that my worrying about being able to be stretched too far in my capacities because, thankfully, my capacity has increased (only through my Heavenly Father's help, I guarantee!) I do know that all the logistics I worried about (money, baby supplies sold-off in my 'we're-so-done-having-babies-stage', 1:5 ratio, etc.) have some how just seemed to "work out." I also know that this past year has gone so amazingly fast and as much as I try to envision what the next years will entail for us, I might as well just practice a little more trust that HIS plan for me is way better than any vision I can come up with.

So I think that's why I think Briggs is my best boyfriend (I know, Erin, you hate that phrase.) I have learned so much in this experience of being his mom. Of course, I love everything from kissing the crook of his neck to picking his boogers (whatever . . . every mom knows that satisfaction) and all the tickles and laughs and new discoveries in between. All my kids have taught me such valuable lessons; I need to be more appreciative of them and it's nights like tonight, while I listen to the nightengale sing, that I am able to really think about them and be grateful.

I am such a loser!!!

2009-04-15T22:50:00.000-07:00

So, thanks for all the voting the last post. I realized, after I asked and then haven't blogged for two days since, that it probably looked like I was just prostituting for comments. But I wasn't, really, and I appreciate the feedback. I have some blogs a-comin', so hang tight. I got some business to discuss, first.

Tonight was the finale of my version of The Biggest Loser. Of the 37 participants 12 were brave enough to actually show up, and 11 of those weighed in.

Here's the skinny Mindy (/ie)s:

And my biggest competition, Annie:

Don't let Annie's darling looks and young face (seriously! doesn't she look about 15 in this picture? and how cute is her baby? it's like a mini Annie!!) fool you. She is hard core. I need to give Annie a huge shout out because she did her work 100% au natural (if you think spitting in a cup and wearing garbage bags to sweat it out is natural . . . she's married to a wrestler!) and if anyone motivated me it was Annie. Ever since Annie moved into my ward I have been impressed with her, but I had no idea how committed and competitive she could be until she gave me a good dose of trash-talking and jokes in the hallways at the church. I knew there was a serious undertone in what she was saying because she was looking good each week when we'd size each other up in the hallways. To really push me to do a smidge better than Annie was realizing a few weeks ago that we started within a pound of each other and at that point we had lost the exact same amount of weight. It was game on!

Here's Lindsey and Samantha (both who were teenagers when I met them and are now beautiful, wonderful women friends of mine . . . which is like calling them old and totally ruining their cool factor.) My mom is doing SOO well with her weight loss too and is reaching milestone after milestone! I'm really proud of her.

Dustin and Leah, my cousin and his wife, came the furthest and I'm so glad they did. Aren't they a gorgeous couple? And so fun! Leah has always been a teensy little thing (seriously, I would crush her if I ever accidentally sat on her!), but she was up for the competition and she shaved more than a tenth of her already tiny self right off. They're awesome!

This was my ghetto weight loss board. Everyone went with me into the bathroom and *some* opted for a strip down to their skivvies so they could get their official weight. I calculated the %s of everyone and then posted it next to their autograph. Mindie helped me pull off the tags to "reveal" the amount lost by each person. And you know what, any loss was good. The whole point was to get people motivated. I know a lot of people didn't want to weigh-in because they knew they wouldn't win, BUT as long as they didn't gain anything the past 4 months, then they're a success. Right? I wanted to do this competition because I was ready to commit to a change and make some permanent adjustments to my lifestyle. It worked for me.

Because I lost weight! In fact, I lost 30.7 pounds.

And when I figured the percentages on my bathroom floor, I realized that the HALF pound I lost more than what Annie had lost made a mere 2/10 of a difference in our weight losses. It was pretty much a bittersweet moment for me. You see, Annie and I had chatted on facebook on Monday night. And she told me where she was with her weight loss. And it was more than me. And I felt pretty defeated that night. But come yesterday morning I figured I had to give it my best effort and so I'd work as much as I can to see if I could at least bridge our gap. I'll give credit to last night's Zumba class, the 3 sessions in the steam room the past 24 hours, the fasting all day today, BUT most of all it was Annie's work that propelled me to really try to BEAT her! But when I did, I felt a little guilty! Like I had survivor's guilt or something.

Everyone was super great about the winning and the not winning. I'm grateful for that, and I fully plan on properly thanking Annie for her hard-fought battle. I doubt it makes her feel any better knowing that she helped me so much, but I've got to give credit where it's due.

Thanks again for all those who played. I really did have a good time, and I can't believe how quickly 4 and a half months go by. (Without this sounding like some awards' show speech or anything) I do want to give thanks to Tyler who's been super supportive while I've focused more on myself. My kids, who've been cooperative in going to the gym with me or eating "boring" foods. All my other family who has been quick to compliment me or take notice of my shrinking self (mostly they comment on my boobs shrinking/sagging, but hey! it's the price) and my friends who've been super patient and helpful at get togethers that involve food (like having healthy snacks OR patiently taking my lunch order with "adjustments" to keep it more healthy.)

I haven't really figured what I am going to do with my winnings. I'm trying to be practical without actually paying bills with it. Any ideas? Other than a new pair of jeans when I lose the last five pounds I want to lose, I haven't committed to anything. Thanks again, everyone!

A blog vote

2009-04-13T00:47:00.000-07:00

I'm a little curious who is still reading my blog (since I post so freakishly infrequently.) Every week I get my sitemeter report and it looks like there's an average of 88 people who look at my blog on any given day. I'm betting some of you are getting sick of getting to my blog and thinking, "POST already!" I've never really though I cared too much who reads what I write, and heavens knows I lack an edit button on myself sometimes, so I've thought of several blogs I should/could/would write, but I'm not sure how to please my people. (Totally kidding! I'm not that into the numbers. Really . . . And now I protesteth too much, me thinks.) So, I'm also curious about what I should blog about. So here are your options. And yes, I'll take requests. Just login real quick (and I KNOW that means all you google readers have to go to my actual site) and tell me which topic.

Spring Break Shenanigans
Easter celebratin'
How Briggs is my best boyfriend
My thoughts on kids' sports
Observations I make while driving around Las Vegas
Memories of my childhood (specify era)
Weight loss/gym musings

Just lemme know and help me get past this blogger's slump. I got a case of the blumps.

Kudos for the "Good Mom" days

2009-04-07T15:45:00.000-07:00

If I had to sum up my ratio of "good mom" days and "bad mom" days, I'd say the latter is probably ahead by a large margin. I hear a lot of whining most days, which I tell myself will one day STOP and turn into appreciation. (And you know one day means when they realize they do know how to scrub a toilet or play the violin or how to self-entertain and it feels good to them to have that "skills" that years before they had whined and boobed and cried about calling it "Soooo BOOOORRRRIIINNNNGG!") I get that kids are kids and they want to play. I'm sensitive to the fact that they would rather be entertained than to do any kind of work and that at some point in their life they won't really have too much of a choice; they'll have to work. BUT since we all suffer, at our house, from drop-it-wherever-you-want disease my kids and I spend a large amount of our time nursing that illness in the form of chores and practice and pitching in. Don't think I'm a slave driver or anything . . . cuz I'm pretty lazy too (where do you think they get it from) and I can appreciate a day spent lazing in front of the TV watching nothing by old Oprah shows.

This week, though, is Spring Break. It's kinda a love-hate relationship with me and time off from school because nothing predicts whining and boobing and crying like getting out of the routine of our normal weeks (summer break, track break, Christmas break, all the breaks generally end up with me wanting to breakdown.) SOOO yesterday, on Day #1, I asked the kids what all they'd like to do and they were quick with 3 or 4 answers each. I told them it was vacation for me, too, so some of the things they wanted to do were not things I would pick to do, but that I would respect their choices if they'd support mine. I also told them that before the fun would begin each day, their chores and music practices would need to be completed. It was just a matter of the facts. And that everything couldn't cost an arm and a leg. We need the arm and a leg. (They understand money when I explain it in appendages better, I guess.)

So, yesterday I got to go to lunch with some girlfriends and then I picked up a playdate for all of my kids. They played for a couple hours over here and then, after the missionaries came to dinner, we headed to the drive-in movie for a double feature.
{Sidenote about the drive-in movie. On Monday nights you pay $1.00 for kids. That's right, our entire family of 7 cost $15.50 to see 2 movies. I added up ticket prices at a normal theater and my guess would have been about $98.25 at a regular theater. PLUS you can bring whatever you want to eat without feeling all guilty for smuggling it past the usher in your super dooper diaper bag. AND when your kid has to pee you can send him up under the screen to let him water the weeds. AND when the kids or the adults are too tired to make it through the second feature, you can wrap him/her up in a blanket and they can have a mighty fine nap. I love it!}
So, we saw Monsters vs. Aliens and Race to Witch Mountain (both movies were on my kids' to do lists) as were playdates. Today, we packed up sandwiches and threw them in the bag with last night's movie snacks and headed to Exploration Park at Mountain's Edge. The weather was gorgeous and we took some friends with us, met my SIL, my sister and her friend and all their kids and had a good time while they ran around and came back to base table to check in. On our way home we stopped by McDonald's for ice cream cones (love $1.00 soft serve cone from McD's) and then the kids (save Briggs) were dropped off for a playdate at their friends' house. So, I've been cleaning, facebooking, and now blogging. Dinner's at my parents tonight (hogies while the kids play in the back yard) and for my part of spring break I will be sneaking off to Kohls and the gym once the kiddos are bathed and ready for bed. Nice, right!?

I'm just saying a little goes a long way for all of us and it really helps the kids when I remind them that we'll cross everything off their list before the end of the week. Still on the list:
Sleepovers
Chuck E. Cheese
A trip to the Library
the new Hannah Montana movie
and a bike ride
Vegas strip exploration (fountains, gardens, touristy stuff we never do)
Yard work
Nothing like a "staycation" to feel like we'll be having a "good mom" week.

Ode to the Green Stuff

2009-03-25T22:12:00.001-07:00

My favorite color is green.
Can you think of things that are green? Perhaps this post will help you note some particular green things that affected me today.

This morning, after dropping the girls off to school, I decided I'd drive through the car wash in the 20 minutes between elementary start time and preschool start time. Because I wanted to be super efficient I told Brock and Brevin they could unbuckle from their carseats to help me collect trash as we rode through the automatic car wash. At some point Brevin was right behind me and I noticed, as I turned around, he had some lovely GREEN buildup in his cute button nose. Because he's been suffering horribly from allergies the past week I took a tissue and showed him if he wrapped it around his finger he could essentially pick his nose in a sanitary way in order to get rid of the crud that doesn't quite drip, but crusts over (I know, TMI. Don't puke, Jer.) As simple as the trick was, it seemed a little beyond the kid, and as I was re-explaining the technique, my ginormous Excursion BANGED into something and we all jerked forward and back again. I was completely stunned . . . weren't we still in the carwash??? Brock whined, "Mom, that hurt!" (Remember, unbuckled kids - I know, Mother of the Year!) I guess sometime during my lesson with Brevin I had missed the bump that indicates we were done with the car wash and then I proceded to roll down a decline right into a cement pole. Nothing like a heavy car in neutral to really get some momentum going.

Once I realized we were outside (seriously, it took me a minute to get my bearings) I backed up and pulled around so the guy could dry my car. (Uh, hello! I'd already paid for the soft cloth drying and the armor-all) I hopped out to check out the damage. The kid working said, "Are you okay?" and I said, "Yeah" all annoyed at myself. Now, most of you know I have a tendency to "bump" into things in my car. What can I say? It's huge and a little scratch here and there just shows personality, right? Well, I knew by the hissing that this may have been a little more than a little tappy-tap-tap. I mean, I've watched enough TV to know the hissing is usually followed by some steam from underneath the hood. As I stared at the front of my car I knew that pole imprint was a bit too deep to fall in my "whoops" category and I had to call Tyler. Before I did so, though, I asked the kid working, "Is that stuff dripping down right there, that neon GREEN fluid, your soap from the car wash, by chance?" Unfortunately my fears were confirmed that when hugging the cement pole I apparantly not only dented my bumper, completely cracked my grate, but I also busted my radiator. Nice.

Luckily Tyler was very calm about the whole thing and I kept emphasizing it was because I was mothering my kid when the distraction happened. Unfortunately, my distraction is going to cost us lots of GREEN stuff from our wallet. Blech. What a way to spend a tax refund :)

Special thanks to my father-in-law who let us borrow his truck for the day and my sister who picked up my boys to get them to preschool and then took them home while I did some retail therapy at Wal-Mart. I figured since I will be stranded for the next few days, I'd get some GREEN plants to fill flower pots and our flower beds. And that's how I spent my afternoon. I worked out my frustrations on a bag of mulch. I'll have to post some pictures, but in my efforts to be more positive, I will be working on our landscaping the next few weeks.

So, yes, I am sure you're GREEN with envy that you didn't bust your radiator this morning. I'm just chalking it up to one of those "will be kinda funny in a few weeks" things.

Peace and Love

2009-03-23T15:25:00.000-07:00

Issues. I've got issues. I know, I know, most everyone who reads this and knows me is probably thinking, "GIRRRRRLL, WHO! Doesn't she have issues!" And because I have issues I spend a lot of time in self-analysis and self-debate about what to worry about and what to let go. Sometimes I get frustrated enough that I just want to quit fighting the fight to be a good person and a virtuous person and an all-around healthy person . . . it's just a lot of work to overcome the natural me. I know I'm much more of an instant-gratification kind of gal, and I'll tell ya, the inch-by-inch . . . NO . . . the millimeter-by-millemeter progress that I make gets to me. It doesn't help that I inadvertantly will UNDO a lot of my personal progress by making some stupid choice that doesn't correspond with the person I want to be. Unfortunately it is the dumb, rash, and impromptu choices that I make by which I judge myself. Since that is my report card I know, especially lately, I have been pretty much failing "self-improvement 101."

One of the things I'm grateful for is a belief that God hears my prayers. I know He has seen me struggle the past month or so with my "issues" and, of course, right before I feel like I'm going to be completely torn apart I have had some tender mercies sent my way. Tender mercies are the little gifts from God that He sends my way to let me know He hears my pleas and sees my frustrations. I know God parents in that super-effective way of subtle messaging when it comes to the way He deals with me, His daughter.

I have been an angry person lately. I have spent a lot of time recently trying to figure out why I'm so angry since I was lashing out at those who were closest to me (yes, sympathy for my husband and family would be appropriate here!) without realizing that I wasn't really angry at/with them; they were just easy scapegoats for my bad mood that was caused by something else all together. I mean, yes, I was upset that Tyler fell asleep during family night last week, but was it worth the cataclysmic meltdown I finally had on Wednesday? No. Did I blame said meltdown on Tyler? You bet your sweet bippy. Poor guy.

See, the real issue was MY issue. I learned a long time ago that anger is a secondary emotion. We always feel something else before we feel angry, but often times it's the anger that is so easily conveyed and spewed. So what are my primary emotions that have resulted in my anger?

I've concluded that I am FRUSTRATED at myself for expecting things to be a certain way and when it got all switched up, the changes threw my world all skee-wamp-is. I feel I have had a hard time getting my feet underneath me. I like to have a vision. I like to know the plan. I have learned before that I shouldn't expect it to all work out just so because it doesn't always do that, but I guess lately I've had another pretty strong reminder that my lesson in remembering that is still being taught. Nonetheless, I am frustrated with how everything has affected our lives and the lives of our loved ones.
I have also decided that I am WORRIED that I am not doing enough for my kids to mold them into wonderful human beings, teaching them life principles amongst their ABC's and 123's, and showing them how to love and serve unconditionally.
I've noticed I am NEGLECTED. I haven't been servicing my soul. I too easily mutter a prayer while I'm on the go instead of kneeling with a humble heart to actually converse with the Lord; I am too busy to stop and study scriptures or good books because I am facebooking or catching up on my DVR'd shows; I slip into conversations talking about other people and casually pass judgement about them without noticing how the tone of negativity has been affecting my own spirit; and I have railed against misjudgements about my character, my church, our government under the cover of "standing up for myself" without practicing the Christian courage to turn the other cheek, and I think that has brought me down a bit.

A couple of my girlfriends brought up some interesting points for me to think about, and I think they were shared with me as part of a "tender mercy" shower. Firstly, I need to have more love and peace in my life and that starts with me. The economy is not going to fix itself overnight and my kids will probably be hitting and whining tomorrow. BUT, how I choose to address those things will be the difference in me not being an angry woman any longer. Secondly, I need to decide what I want to "hang my hat" on. Is there something in my life that I take pride in? And more importantly, is what defines me a worthwhile purpose in my life? Do I hang my hat on my weight, or my husband's salary, how perky [or soo not perky] my boobs are, the talents my kids have in comparison to others' kids??? I think I have been "hanging my hat" on those hooks and I just don't think that's doing it for me. I don't think that's where it's at. To hang my hat. So, I'm going to try and decide what my ultimate focus needs to be for ME.

It's kinda like asking myself how I want others to consider me when they die, I guess. How sad would it be for them to recognize all my shallow pursuits (especially of late)? I just want to be better. I want to be out of this funk. I want to be full of peace and love. And not angry any more!

The Principal, The PTA, and the party

2009-03-23T08:32:00.000-07:00

On my list of things I should be better at, it is to be one of the PTA moms who helps with the activities and at the school. Instead I pay my dues and every now and then I will bring goodies to the school for whatever activities. I did volunteer to work the "chill zone" for Kenzie's g.a.t.e. program, but other than that I keep my distance from the schools. I tell myself that I am doing them a favor by not schlepping my three small boys behind me who will, in all probability, leave a wake of destruction behind whatever good I may be doing.

Last week my dad, who's the principal at Helen Herr Elementary, invited us to their PTA spaghetti dinner. Now, shame on me, I've not ever gone to our school's fundraising dinners, but since it was my dad I figured it'd be worth the trek. And a school PTA supporting the kids is a school PTA supporting kids, so why discriminate??? Plus it's a good excuse to see my dad. (*Sidenote* It's so fun to see my dad in action. To watch him interact with his staff and see the kids revere him like a rock star. He was always such an example of what an excellent teacher and I really appreciate his example as a principal.)

Now, this is a party I would head up. It was to culminate Nevada Reading week and here was what they did: Everyone who wanted to come to the dinner bought a ticket from the PTA. That got you all you can eat spaghetti and meatballs (that was donated) a roll and a can of soda. The PTA also sold baked goods for dessert. THEN the teachers/classrooms who were interested put together a booked-themed gift basket for a raffle. Tickets were sold for a dollar and then there were canisters placed in front of the baskets so we cold select where we wanted to put our tickets. My family, my brother and his family, and my parents all went and bought tickets. We let the kids pick which baskets they wanted to win and wouldn't you know it, we won the Junie B. Jones Aloha-ha basket? We were thrilled. The basket had a bunch of beach accessories and pool supplies (leies, goggles, tiki torches, blow-up beach ball, swim rings and much much more PLUS we got the book.) My dad had put together a basket around "The Day Jimmy's Boa at the Wash." (It was a laundry wicker basket with a bunch of laundry supplies: detergent, fabric softner, hangers, clothes pins, a collapsable hamper, etc. and then he wrapped a stuffed snake around the top . . . too cute.) Anyhow, because the tickets were a dollar each, each teacher/classroom gets the exact amount of money that their basket earned. One teacher ended up earning $150.00 for her "Bearnstein Bears Too Much Basket" which was stocked with a ton of junk food. Anyway, it was a really fun time and I'm glad we made the trek to Helen Herr to be a part of it. (It was extra fun that my parents AND my niece, Zoee, also won baskets!)

Here's some pictures of the good times:

In case you wondered . . .

2009-03-20T12:49:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago I made a status update on facebook one Sunday morning about how despite it being HOURS before church started I could pretty much guarantee we'd be late to church. The status update was around 10am . . . church for us is at 1pm. How'd I know we'd be late? Well . . . lateness is a bit of a pattern of mine and now that Tyler's serving as the YM President in our ward he has meetings before church; meaning my "on-time conscience" is no longer existent on Sunday mornings. I have tried giving ourselves a "target time" (a target time is considerably earlier than the time an event starts, which allows for us to still be running a bit behind, but that would guarantee us being on time.)

I've said many times that it's not like we're sitting around on Sunday mornings wasting time, so last Sunday I captured some proof of the important things that put us behind on our schedule.

Evidence A) Brock and Caylee and Brevin HAVE to play outside. I mean if they didn't take full advantage of the sun literally SHINING down into our backyard it would be a travesty.

Evidence B) I HAVE to catch up on old issues of scrapbooking magazines. I mean some of those have been sitting around for years and we NO LONGER need the clutter. Plus, what better day than Sunday to get some extra inspiration?

Evidence C) We MUST take Sunday mornings to indulge in bubble baths where we catch up on our week with our siblings. I mean, especially when you're 9. Cuz when else are you going to fit into your schedule?

I'm just sayin'. We obviously do the bare minimum (no pun intended based on the bath picture above) before buckling down to feed, color-coordinate, iron, dress, primp, doll up, and pack up the 5 munchkins. So once you add in all that stuff can you really be shocked that sometimes I make it to church 30 minutes past 1:00pm??? (And actually the week we took these pictures we made it for the announcements and opening song. Yesssss! I guess it can be done.)

Too competitive for my own good.

2009-03-19T14:57:00.001-07:00

Yes, I took down the blama post. We're all over it, right!? Right.

So several of my blog peeps have posted this contest on their sites that involves committing to send something to the first five people to comment. I have seen it on at least 5 blogs and because I am competitive enough to WANT to win I'd check the comment number and see that I'd be eligible for one of the five gifts. BUT, I also was able to remind myself that I would then be obligated to post the same contest and then be also obligated to send five things from me to the first five commenters and I decided I didn't want to the stress I knew that would come from that! I mean, HELLO!, it's like Christmas gifting in March and that is plenty of stress for me . . . don't even get me started on the Easter Bunny angst!

HOWEVER, when Jerolyn checked her comments at my house yesterday and said to me, "Ohhhh, if you hurry you can be the fifth one," I snagged the laptop and commented in the frenzy to win the prize and I thought, "YESSSS I totally won! Crap! NOW I am obligated to post" this :

Pay attention kids! Here is the deal:

The first five people to comment on this post will get something made by me. My choice. For you. This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:
1- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make.
2- What I make will be just for you.
3- It'll be done this year.
4- You have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a story. It may be photography, I may sew or stitch or bake something. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure!
5- I reserve the right to do whatever I want!

The catch? Oh, the catch is that you must re-post this on your own blog and offer the same deal to 5 of your own lucky blog readers. So, the first 5 people to leave a comment telling me they are in, win a FAB-U-LOUS homemade gift by me! Oh, and be sure to post a picture of what you win when you get it.

Soo, yeah. I'm sure you're all racing to the comment section right now so you can be a winner, winner, chicken dinner.

After the whole BLAMA (that's my new term for blog+drama) on Monday I have found that I have a new fire lit underneath me for the last few weeks of this weight loss challenge. The ironic thing is my week is REALLY busy and I haven't been able to go to the gym. Grrrr. I am thinking about the weigh-in on the 15th of April and am looking forward at seeing everyone and what they've accomplished. I was feeling pretty good about my %, but I think I may have peaked and I am trying to remind myself that I'm two pounds away from my realistic goal and 12 pounds from my ultimate goal. We'll see . . . but I would sure like to spend the $780.00 on myself and my wardrobe and a matching phone (thanks for the reminder Jessi!) And for those of you who don't feel like you've done much YET, just let me remind you that in the next 4 weeks you could lose a lot of pounds and end up winning the whole thing. I'm expecting you to . . . I'll be emailing everyone in the contest about the details for our weigh-in, but if anyone else wants to come to the party, let me know and you can be part of the action. It'll be good times, fer sher!

Alright . . . now comment for a prize. Hurry . . . Click fast . . .

Have you seen this face???

2009-03-07T17:08:00.000-08:00

Several weeks ago my sister and I were planning our "super-dooper-Mom-and-kids-and-cousins-and-whoever-else-we-can-convince-to-come-along" trip for this coming summer when Erin mentioned maybe taking a little trip to Grouse Creek, Utah. Grouse Creek is a small farming community that barely exists on the Idaho/Utah boundary. My grandma lived there as a young girl and, come to find out after our marriage, it is the town where Tyler's grandpa grew up also. Sooo, as any info-seeking gals would do, we both typed in an internet search for http://www.grousecreek.com/. (And yes, sometimes Erin and I will talk on the phone while we are both on the internet looking at the exact same thing. It's like sisterly tech support.)

Anyway, this homespun website included all these old photos and HISTORIES of the people who lived in Grouse Creek. Of course, we clicked on our relatives and then we clicked on the Barlow-side ancestors. Holy treasure chest!!! There were pictures and stories and histories I had never seen before. Tyler's great-grandparents, aunts and uncles, on and on and on. We were both scrolling through so fast saying to each other, "Look at this old picture" or reading to each other bits and pieces of their stories. Then I found this picture:

I knew immediately that the boy in the front left was a direct line to my kids because I have seen that face looking at me before. But when I see it, it's real and alive and in color. And it's a look that is momentary or just a quick glare. It's the "I just woke up from a nap and can't be bothered to smile at you" look. Or the one that says, "I can hear you but in 2.5 seconds I am going to ignore everything you just told me to [not] do." Sure enough, after looking at the description of the people in this family picture, I put it together that the front left boy was none other than my Brock's great-grandfather. And I knew where Brock got that look. You know, this one:
And I love that stuff! I have always felt that spirit of connection with our ancestors. I think they love us and are very invested in our families (their lineage.) There's something about the similarities being captured on film that make it so. When I found a picture of me and my sister talking with friends and I initially thought Erin was me and I was her; THEN I knew we really resembled each other. It didn't really matter how many people had told us that beforehand. So here I have a photograph that shows that Brock really is a little Barlow.

Interestingly, the zoomed photo of Brock was from this family picture:
And what I noticed in ours is that, too, like Brock's great-grandfather's family photo, we have one devilishly handsome father, a fairly young mom, two girls and three boys . . . just like the Barlow family of old.

P.S. Remember the whole name debate when I was pregnant with Briggs and I wanted to name him Jesse? The dad in the above picture (far right) IS Jesse (sportin' the sweet stache.) HE was the man who was friends with Brock's OTHER great-great-grandpa Quartus Sparks Catlin while they lived in little Grouse Creek, Utah.

Most Amazing Episode EVER!

2009-03-03T00:16:00.000-08:00

So for the past few seasons of ABC's ever-stimulating reality/drama show, "The Bachelor," I have been gathering with some of my peeps to watch and discuss the people who purposefully choose to be on a completely ridiculous trainwreck of a show . . . to find TRUE LOVE! Trust me, my husband reminds me how silly the premise and entire show is, BUT I simply can't help myself. Season after season I get totally hooked and look forward to Chris Harrison's "This is the final rose" x 20 million and the promos that remind us that next week will be the most dramatic show in Bachelor history.

A couple weeks ago I brought my camera to capture our "parties" which are really just a group of us who gather usually at my sister's house. (Apparently, Daniel informed me, my house isn't as fun as Erin's because I stress about cleaning and I multi-task during the show; Erin only stresses about cleaning and has thus been dubbed 2nd "funnest"; but Stacy's [my SIL] is by far the best place to watch the Bachelor because we all chill and there is NO stressing or multi-tasking. BUT Stac moved to Connecticut [okay, it's really just the other side of town] so we're forced to take second-best accomodations at Erin's . . . but I digress!)

Really, there's not a lot of partying. Just a lot of pausing and rewinding to see the stink eyes and the crusty looks from one Bachelorette to another and then a lot of fast-forwarding past the recaps and the emotional men (because, frankly, that's really uncomfortable.) Here's Erin (WHO is multi-tasking, B.T.W., but the Bachelor policeman Daniel didn't make it that night.)

And these are Jennie's feet all kicked back. Yes, the Bachelor should be watched in uber-comfortable circumstances because, heavens knows, those ladies do some funky stuff on national television that make the home viewers feel pretty scrunchy and uncomforable. Like the lady this season who blubbered and snotted her love and affection for the Bachelor and then moved in to kiss him even though her shredded kleenex was still stuck to her lip. Or when someone starts opera singing (ALWAYS uncomfortable). OR, a classic, sticks her thong in a Bachelor's pocket . . . too good to be made up or scripted. This is real desperation we're watching!

And because we really do have a life, our party prefers to watch the Bachelor via TIVO or a DVR to move past the commercials and the aforementioned standards of the show (stink eyes, crying men, and recaps). This is the beautiful Ms. Angela enjoying the show:

So, yeah, tonight was the finale with Jason Mesnick and HOLY CRAP!!! It really was the most dramatic/amazing Bachelor finale EVER. Well, the rose ceremony was no big whoop. Melissa was the obvious choice, but I do have to admit that I totally was feeling a team shift toward Molly after their whole scrapbook date. I'm a sucker for the scrapbook, I guess. Long story short, *SPOILER ALERT* Jason picks Melissa, but by the "after the rose" show the two were obviously NOT working out and then he totally asks Molly to consider dating him again. I know. Can you believe it? There were some pretty seriously uncomfortable moments where the anxiety actually got to me and I thought, this is far too personal to be a part of . . . I get suckered in EVERY season, people. But even better than spending two hours watching Jason date two women, fall in love with them both, dump one, a LOT of crying (seriously has anyone met a man who'd hang over the glass wall thing a boob like that?), propose to the other girl, have the show's host give some schpeal about the sanctity of what we're about to witness, see the engagement end, listen to some more crying, and THEN watch The Bachelor have the nerve to publicly ask the dumpee to reconsider dating him, and THEN to see her accept and completely make out with him IS that tomorrow there is a Part II of "After the Rose." I just don't know if tomorrow will go fast enough.

Yes, true to form, The Bachelor was a trainwreck this season. And WE LOVED IT! We analyzed the face grabbing with every kiss, the phrases that were WAY overused, the bad cleavage (and dresses and accessories and botox jobs), and the candor with which these women completely give their life to a guy within a matter or weeks. But perhaps this season, more than others, we noticed the incredible comeback of

The Side Pony Tail

-and-

The Bad Bump-age with the pulled back hair dos.

All I'm saying is that if you're going on national TV to find true love competing against a bunch of other ladies, perhaps someone could use a comb to smooth over the lumpy lumps. And while a side pony tail may look cute from head-on when you're walking out of a limo . . . over-wearing it gets tiring and then seeing it from different angles makes me think, "mm, not so cute!" Here's my tribute to what the gals side pony tails looked like 99% of the time:

Special thanks goes to my peeps of this season: Erin, Daniel (who made it to many of our meetings unless he got himself all sunburned while fishing at Lake Mead and planned a move for the day after the finale AND then didn't take care of himself so he also ended up with some too-much-stree-blame-it-on-his-sister sickness), Stacy (until she quit us and never called to say she wasn't coming tonight even though I brought pie), David (my brother who graced us with his appearance once this season), Jerolyn, Jennie, Angela, and my mom and Marsha. I also feel the need to be grateful for the cinnamon rolls, cookies, and pie that got us through this season. Now that it's all over, maybe I can move off my stinkin' weight plateau!

I'd like to bear my testimony . . .

2009-03-01T17:36:00.000-08:00

This afternoon as we were driving to church WAY late (like, record-breaking late, even for me . . . 1:40pm for a 1:00pm church service), I told the kids, "We should just have our own little fast and testimony meeting right here in the car. It's such a beautiful day and we've already missed half of sacrament meeting, so maybe you guys could just share your testimonies with me."

Brevin said, "I don't even know what a testimony is."

So I said, "Sure you do, Brev. A testimony is when you share what you believe; something you know to be true. Usually, at church we share what we believe that we've learned about or from Heavenly Father and Jesus."

"Oh," he said, "then I believe we should not hit or punch or pinch."

"That's right because how does that make other people feel when we hit or punch or pinch?" I asked (going for high level thinking here with my 5 year old.)

"That's bad and it makes people sad and hurt."

"Yup, so since Heavenly Father and Jesus teach us that we should be kind to everyone, your testimony is that you believe we should not hit and punch and pinch because we should be nice like Heavenly Father and Jesus want us to," I reiterate.

Brevin had pretty much tuned out by this point even though I thought we were having a good little chit chat when Caylee said, "I know what I would have a testimony of."

"Oh good, what would you share?" I asked thinking this was a genuinely special moment with my kids. I really was making the best of this motherhood thing.

"I have a testimony of that we should be on time."

(Phhhisssssshhhh . . . that would be the wind out of my sails.)

Amen, Caylee. Amen.

The Price of Paula

2009-02-27T21:28:00.000-08:00

This post is just to record my feelings as I have spent the past 4 hours deep cleaning my main part of my house (kitchen, dining, living, and family rooms) and all our laundry. Tomorrow I will work on the bathrooms and bedrooms.

A few years ago I had an oopherectomy. That's when they remove an ovary. I remember when it happened I thought my life would never resume and I didn't know how I would ever recover from being sliced open to remove my broken ovary. As I recuperated on the recliner I watched my house get more and more cluttered and dusty and the cleaning stacked up. At the time, my oldest child was not quite 6 years and very busy with her kindergarten career, and my others were 15 months and almost 3 (not quite old enough to pick up my slack.) So, my mother-in-law passed along the number of a cleaning service and that's when my relationship with Paula began.

Paula came every couple of weeks until I got my strength back and then, funny thing, she kept coming long after I was back on my feet. I knew that every two weeks Paula would come and wipe down the dripped ketchup in my fridge, empty the crumbs from the bottom of my toaster oven, change all the bed linens, and clean out my garbage cans. After a while I knew my relationship with Paula was a little self-indulgent and we had a little break-up.

It was a short break. Shortly after I got pregnant with Brock I called Paula back home and we began our bi-monthly trysts again. It was a wonderful arrangement that made everyone happy. And by everyone, I mean everyone! Caylee and Brevin would hang out and listen to her clock radio of Mexican music in every room she was cleaning. I was usually in the next room "pre-cleaning" for most of the day Paula was at our house and it was always nice to feel like we were on a team. Granted we didn't bond through conversation, but we would laugh at the kids together and she would come in and pick up the crying babies I had while she was working for us (Brock and Briggs) if I was in the middle of something. I would often find my boys practicing their light saber skills on Paula's backside while she tried to make the bunk beds simultaneously fending off their offenses. Instead of getting mad at them, she would tease them in Spanish and pretend she was going to get them and they would squeal and run and then return shortly after to interrupt her again. I think she was so patient with them because she had boys of her own.

I often wondered what Paula thought of us. Was our house dirtier than others? Did she think we were snots for not cleaning our own house? Did she resent my kids being the ones that were bugging her instead of her own because she was a working mom? There were some Monday mornings when I would get a call asking if I wanted someone else to come clean because Paula had a sick child or was out of town. I would decline. Paula was my girl. She was my partner. We worked well together. I trusted her enough to leave her in my home. AND, I found her honest and hard-working and kind. She would bring me notes written in English if there was anything important for me to know. I would give her small gifts and some of Caylee's hand-me-downs that Paula would pass to her niece. I know there was more to me looking forward to Paula's scheduled days than just having a clean home. I SOOO appreciated what she gave me.

Recently we've needed to cut back. We're definitely feeling the downturn of the economy and we're trying to live within our means, which means for the past few months I've been given the "we've got to cut back" talk SEVERAL times. Now, I KNOW paying Paula to mop my floors and scour my shower is an excessive expense. Actually, it was self-indulgent. I like a clean house. I need order. I need to know that every two weeks I can have a completely shiny, mopped, dusted house. Between the 6 hours Paula cleaned and the 4 hours I would spend putting all our stuff away, we got it all done. And I know I could do it. Give me 10 hours and no kids in the way, and yes, I could do the same job for no cost.

But there is a price. To prepare for my ultimate cut-back (I've already cut the pedicures, fake nails, date nights, and trips away . . . not to mention the homemade meals I've been making and the coupons I've been clipping) we spent Valentine's Saturday deep cleaning my house. I invoked the help of the entire family to put EVERYTHING where it belongs, then we dusted and vacuumed and scrubbed and mopped. Well. I hollered at the kids to do it, and they sorta did it until it became un-fun and then they'd disappear and wander off and meander to the other room. And then I'd get frustrated and do most of it myself. But then I'd get irritated that the "cutting back" meant I was picking up that entire job. And then I'd holler at the kids again. I'd show them (again) how to clean the counters and then how to mop up all the water they got on the floor. [You see, even though you have someone to clean your house every other week, with 5 kids you still have to clean it every day . . . we call those chores . . . so don't be getting the impression we sit on our chaise lounges until Paula comes to clean up after us.] Tyler, bless his heart, spent 2 1/2 hours cleaning our bathroom. IT WAS NOT THAT DIRTY! So I'm going to call Tyler thorough (because that is a lot nicer than making the connection that the kids' disappearing/wandering/meandering off may be an inherited trait.) By early afternoon Tyler went outside to work in the yard (where he busted his tail, fer reals!) and I was left inside to keep the troops working. By the end of the day, I was tired. I was worn out more emotionally (because of our financial state) and physically (from all the work) and mentally (from controlling myself from losing it with the kids all day long.) Yes, the house was cleaned. But yes, too, the price was WAY more than we ever paid dear, sweet Paula.

The past few months Paula has only come once a month. Today I called and told the company we could no longer afford to pay her to come. It was sad for me. On many levels. I think Paula was a symbol of better times. And that is over. Because she made my life easier, it was obviously something that I treated myself to. And now that is over too. When Paula came every two weeks, I knew that the chores that I hated to do and didn't want to fight my kids to do were going to get done. And now I have to do that and fight that fight on top of all the other things moms do. AND YES, I know many of you have been doing it for the past 3 years since Paula and I have been a team. Still. Tonight I mourn the end of an era.

Please tell me it will be okay. Not to lower my expectations about my house. But, tell me how to get it all done without a Paula every other week. Blech. I'm a boob. Thanks for listening.

President's Day celebration . . . Vegas style

2009-02-19T12:46:00.000-08:00

Alright, I'll say it. Being married to a banker is a pretty good deal, especially when holidays come around (like President's Day.) Tyler was off and we decided we'd spend the day doing what EVERY Las Vegan LOVES to do on the holiday that immediately followed the most romantic day of the year.

We hung out at a downtown wedding chapel!

Tyler's cousin Jenny and her fiance, Ryan, brought their family to Vegas so we could hang out with them . . . wasn't that nice of the happy couple? Oh, well, there was the business that Jenny and Ryan got married . . . either way we were glad for the excuse to get together and spend some time with the long-lost San Fran/Bay area Barlow family. (Okay, they're not long-lost . . . they have visited SEVERAL times since we've been married, but the last time we were at their house in Pleasanton was before Tyler and I got married . . . Yikes, we're totally slacking on the visiting!)

Here's Uncle Steve and Aunt Jane

Don't these two look like trouble? You would not believe some of the stories Tyler's dad (on left) has confessed about his and Steven's wild and crazy days in Salt Lake City. I'm pretty sure the Barlow brothers did pa-lenty of terrorizing the Avenues back in the day. {All those crazy grandboys, Bruce? It's called Karma! ;) j/k }

Mr. and Mrs. Wallace

And here's all the wedding party.

It was great to see Anne, Laura, Jenny, Mike (and his wife Chelsea who brough THE most darling little girl Sammy) and to meet Jeff and his wife Kim (for the first time . . . I'm telling you we're slackers in the visiting department!) Jane and Steven are always fun to be around and both Tyler and I enjoyed the Mexican lunch we all had at the New York hotel/casino and then just the hanging out with everyone for the afternoon at Bruce and Dodie's. I'm telling you; it'll be a shame if Briggs doesn't get to know Sammy a little better because they are only two months apart and she is DANG cute!

While we didn't get to hang out with the bride and groom too much (they were a little occupied being newlyweds and all!), we are happy for the both of them and hope they enjoy life together. The trip was quick, but like Mike said, it's better to reunite at weddings than at funerals. So true. So, Happy President's Day/Wedding day!

Me and Marie

2009-02-18T14:04:00.000-08:00

So this afternoon, despite my better judgement/because I can hardly resist the Rio, I met my sister (Erin), cousin (Jerolyn) and friend (Jennie) for some lunch. Before meeting, I warned Jer that I hadn't showered from the gym and she confessed she didn't have any make-up on. I told her that we'd probably see someone famous since we both looked like crap (which is kinda a running joke with her because a couple months ago whilst eating there she saw Marie Osmond and the two of them had a camera phone picture moment even though Jer was only sporting her best bun-hair-do and sweatshirt ensemble.) SURE ENOUGH, when we were about done Ms. Marie Osmond comes a-walkin' in. So we stewed for a bit and I pulled out my trusty-keep-in-the-diaper-bag camera as we strategized on how to rudely interrupt without wanting to interrupt, but still be able to ask for a little group photo. Erin finally had to leave and then Jennie gave out so it was me and Jer. We kept spying her food (nachos, soup, and something else) and I even tried bribing Brevin to be the one to go ask the famous lady for a picture.

After building up the nerve and a couple trips to the potty to make sure the kids were well watered, I finally went and invaded her space to ask if she'd take a picture with my family.

She was VERY nice about it all (so hard being famous, you know!) This was how my rambling and her nice-ness went:

ME: Ms. Osmond, I hate to interrupt your lunch, well, not enough to NOT interrupt it, but I know I will really regret not asking you for a picture with my family as soon as I leave, so I just had to do it.

MARIE: Oh, yeah, sure (as she's trying to swallow and clean her teeth off). Do you have a camera?

ME: Yes, it's right here. I had it in my diaper bag. I was just telling my boys how wonderful you are and how much their grandma {SHOUT OUT DODIE!} enjoyed watching you on Dancing with the Stars.

MARIE: (Politely listening takes my camera and gives it to her assistant who pulls a chair over and helps Brock climb up on it.)

Isn't she nice?! I pulled Jerolyn and Ellie into it and the assistant snapped a picture of all the clan. I thanked her a ton, told her I appreciated her being so gracious and letting us take her picture; she'd made my day. Then we totally bolted.

I'm telling you . . . first Harry Reid, then Marie Osmond. I'm going to start a collage frame with all the famous peeps who have lunch with me at Cafe Rio!

PS. Amy, I WILL invite the mayor for lunch. And Wysons/Wadsworths . . . just hang out with me a little longer and I could've hooked you UP!

Dirty Mouth

2009-02-17T13:43:00.000-08:00

{***Warning! I will be typing curse words in this post. I'm not clever enough to use the right * or & or % symbols to pretend like I'm trying to say the word without saying the word.***}

This morning Caylee came into my room, climbed on my bed, and while I was getting ready she asked, "Mom what is a bitch?" Since I was in the bathroom I'm sure she missed my momentary panic-look on my face. So, I girded my loins and walked over to her and answered, "Well, a bitch is actually a name for a female dog, but now a lot of people use that word as a mean and nasty word for any girl that they don't like. It is a really bad word and you should never, never, never say it or ESPECIALLY call another person a bitch. If you do say it, you will be in big trouble. Where did you hear that word, by the way?" Apparantly it's on "Hot and Cold" by Katy Perry which I had just uploaded to her ipod this weekend.

Caylee seemed satisfied with the explanation and I was hoping it would be one of those things she filed away in her "maturity" file, but not 20 minutes later Mackenzie came into the living room with big eyes and said, "Caylee just called me the B-word"

"CAYLEE!!!!" I yelled.

"What? I didn't call her that, Mom!" she shouted back from her bedroom.

"I told you that you were going to get in trouble for saying that. You DO NOT call your sister that." I said (slash-yelled).

"Yes she did, Mom. She did call me the b-word." Mackenzie persisted.

"Both of you in here. Right. Now." wait, wait, wait "Tell me exactly what happened."

Caylee said, "I just asked her if she knew what a b-word was."

Kenzie continued, "And then she said 'because you're being one.'"

"Caylee" I whined, "I told you that you CANNOT say that word. Bring me your ipod. You are grounded from it and I'm taking that song off your ipod."

So nice, huh!

******

{This one is pretty gross, just FYI!)

So I had finished my workout and was doing a little cool down stretch when my friend Deborah came up the stairs and we started to chat before I had to leave and her pilates class started. We're chatting, chatting, chatting, and I opened my water bottle and chug, chug, chug. A little more chat, chat, chat and I checked the time. Whoops, time to go . . . bye, bye, gotta get the kids, have fun at your class, grab my stuff, down the stairs . . . wait . . . this isn't my water bottle . . . this is . . . OH MY CRAP! This is NOT my water bottle that I was just chugging, chugging, chugging! Oh yeah my people! I had totally opened someone else's water bottle (who I assume was walking the track) because it was right in front of me [where I was sitting on the mat stretching] AND THEN I DRANK ABOUT HALF THE BOTTLE!!!

Are you about grossing out right now?

So, I made a quick decision (that, in hindsight, was probably not right since I subjected some other person to then drink after me, some random stranger) to put the water bottle back where I had picked it up . . . even though I had already swigged half of it. I just couldn't risk being caught if I filled it back up and THEN put it back. And yes, having thought it all through, I'm pretty sure I should have just thrown the bottle away.

Oh, I have GOT to pay more attention and then NOT drink from other people's bottles.

NASTY!
NASTY!!
NASTY!!!

What is more lame?

2009-02-16T09:09:00.000-08:00

When Tyler walked into the family room a few minutes ago he said, "Are you on facebook again?" with a tone that implied he thought it would be lame that I would be interested in the status changes of my nearest and dearest . . . I mean it had been at least 11 hours since I checked it before bedtime. So, I replied to him, "REALLY? Cuz weren't you just on e-bay looking at trucks for a couple HOURS even though you already have a truck?" (And by truck I will say he also looks at trailers and jeeps too.) But F.Y.I., last night, after I had turned off the computer, he was STILL looking on e-bay, so I'd say he's been logging the most lame-activity-hours on the 'ol in-ter-yer-net.

What's your analysis?

Is it more "LAME" to be perusing e-bay for hours upon hours for trucks, trailers, and jeeps (really, it's about the only thing he looks at)? or is it more "LAME" to be on facebook catching up with old friends and new ones?

(Really, it seems obvious to me ...)

Objects of my Affection

2009-02-15T08:04:00.000-08:00

Seeing as yesterday was Valentine's Day and I haven't really posted anything too personal lately, I thought I'd share some things about my family and why I love them so much these days. (Not that I don't love them on other days, but I'm trying to be particularly observant about WHY they are so great to me every day.)

I snapped this picture of Tyler the other night before bedtime. We're pretty death on the witching hour of bedtime since it means it's time for just the two of us to . . . well, watch TV and play on the computer. But a lot of nights after we read scriptures (church history for families right now) and say prayers he'll "race" the kids to bed. On this night they did it a little formal and what you can't see (except from Caylee's expression) is that he has a hold on the girls jammies so they don't smoke their brothers. He's a fun dad like that to think about racing WITH the kids. I'm also very blessed that Tyler's a leader when it comes to scriptures and prayers. Oh how I'm grateful he plays that role . . . I tend to get so caught up in finishing the dishes and picking up stuff that a lot of nights I'd end up passing on the whole routine just to get the kids in bed. But Tyler is good to initiate.

And, without giving too much information, Tyler is an initiator of "other" activities, too. I have never doubted his love for me and he's good at telling me and showing me how much he loves me. I told him last night while we watched the other couples dancing at the church valentine's dance how much I would love him to surprise me and enroll the two of us in dance classes (ya know, a little rumba, some fox trot, and a little swingy-dingy . . . just wait til Dancing with the Stars comes on . . . then I'll really have the fever for it.) You can all imagine the eye-rolling, but one year, down the road he'll pull out that big gun and surprise me and I'll know how much it means since he'll be hating every minute of it. What a guy!

I want to note, too, that Tyler is a hard-worker. We deep cleaned our house all day yesterday and as much as I like to win the "I've done so much more than you" contest, he really did a lot around the house AND then went outside to blow out some of our gnarly landscaping. Not only will he do a lot around the house and for the kids, he goes to work EVERYDAY where he is stressed and frustrated and stuck in an office (a little bit of hell for those of you who know Tyler.) I really appreciate him.

Brock is such an easy boy to love, when I don't want to strangle him. I think I'll have my hands full since he spent the first two years of his life being the "baby" of our family. More and more, though, I see him becoming more independent and, while it makes me a little sad, I am proud he wants to be more like Brevin and his sisters and not so much like the real baby, Briggs. Brock loves to be out and about; loves preschool and watching Tom and Jerry. His best friends are his cousins (Ellie, Caitlyn, Zoee) and any of Brevin's friends. Recently, Mackenzie has taken Brock with her when hanging out with the neighborhood kids because they think he's cool and fun. Brock just does his own thing and really doesn't regard much else. That does get a little hard when "his thing" is whacking his brother for no reason or taking his sisters' stuff only to tease them. Brock regularly says some REALLY funny stuff. At the beginning of the year, during a money meeting at FHE we were talking about living in a budget and cutting back our spending with the kids. After Mackenzie offered that the kids could do more cleaning so we wouldn't have to pay the cleaning lady, Brock said, "Ooohhhh, I would not like that at all. Dat would be a very, very bad idea Kenzie." I thought it was so funny that he would be that tuned in to our conversation and be so adamant about his opinion (which I totally backed him on!) Brock likes to play with Brevin and help with Briggs (see above pic). He likes to cuddle with me (YAY!) and play tennis and go camping with his dad. I love him to bits and pieces.

Briggs is the blessing I never knew I needed. A real tender mercy from the Lord. He's 9 months now and just the past few days has started to crawl forward. Before that he'd do a combination roll/sit/backward slide thing to get him where he wanted. I love his cheesy little grin and the way he'll snuggle his head into my chest when he's tired. I am so grateful that he's been a good boy at the gym the past 6 weeks NEVER crying or pooping so they have to call me from my workout. He is a content baby (which I prayed for), yet opinionated (which I brace for.) He really only fusses when he is hungry or when everyone walks out of a room leaving him alone. (I think he will get over that once he realizes he can now crawl after us.) He's discovering cupboards and the treasures within which means I'll be updating the child-proofing shortly. Briggs is a good sleeper; has been from early on, and that alone makes me love him SOOO deeply. His hair is starting to fill in (dark . . . of course . . . I'll never have a white blondie!) and I know that his baby phase will be over so soon. How could I not just eat him up with his four-tooth grin? It's really pretty amazing that I don't.

My Caylee bug is all fire and ice. If there's anything to sum up Caylee it would be that she's passionate. She is either LO-VING you or HATING you and either way she'll end up wanting to "hold you." Caylee is very funny and tries really hard to be super grown up. She still loves playing with dollhouses and Polly Pockets, but also knows all about Zack Efron and Hollywood's "it" girls. I love Caylee's creativity and clever-ness. I love that she sings loudly and shakes her bootie whenEVER there is music on. She's easy going enough not to be too fussy about her clothes and hair-do's, but girly-girl enough to care. While I wish Caylee's attention span was a little longer, she seems to be doing well in school and makes friends easily. Every time an opportunity arises, Caylee will beat Kenzie at introducing herself to random kids and adults at the park, McDonalds, church, anywhere really. She has plenty of "it's not fair moments" these days, but mostly she's super grateful for anything she gets/has (especially playdates at her Aunt Erin's or Aunt Mindie's!) She loves family and I'm always impressed with how her nightly prayers have evolved from the rote to sincere and involved ones. She's a gem.

This is how we will normally find Brevin first thing in the morning . . . and later in the afternoon . . . and before bedtime. He loves video games and may be our first (and at this point, only) gamer. Since Tyler and I can't really relate to his passion for Lego Star Wars or Super Mario, we often give in to his game time and let him play. If we don't "allow" him to play, we'll find him behind some close door getting his "SuperMario" on. Brevin is a little sneaky and impatient, a combination that means he'll just find his own way to do what he wants when he wants. He's very smart and does not like being bossed around. I find that he does a lot of the bossing (which is embarrassing to listen to him play with others sometimes!) and he's kinda moody/broody. BUT, he's my one kid who'll tell me a million times a day how much he loves me. He's always good to play with Caylee AND Brock AND anyone else who wants to play with him. He loves playdates, but also loves being at home in his PJs (playing with DS, I'm sure.) I love Brevin because he is persistent and forgiving with me (like when I forget to get him breakfast and he keeps reminding me and then when I apologize for forgetting, he says, "It's okay, Mom, I forgive you or forgetting to feed me.") And I'm grateful that our middle child is opinionated and willing to share his opinion, like when he puts stipulations on playing outside: "I'll play outside only if I get the green bike" or "I'll play T-ball with you, Dad, only if it's not windy." Brev still sleeps with his Lambchop and could eat burritos everyday. He likes anything on Cartoon Network to watch, but especially Star Wars: The Clone Wars. While I think Brevin is one of my more complicated kids, I wouldn't want to be without him. Who'd give me the crusty when I embarrass him by being too silly? He's ma boy!

And last, but not least, is my dear, sweet Kenzie. There's a paradox of being the first child of a first child. While I understand how hard it is to blaze the trail, I am not very easy on Mackenzie. I can't believe she'll soon be 10 (that's a double digit number people!) and how much more mature she is EVERY day. I'm caught off guard if she has a momentary breakkdown or a particularly child-like moment, but then she uses a rationale that is so much older. Last night, when we got home from the dance, Kenzie said, "Mom will you snuggle with me for a minute," which was so child-like, and then she reminded me, "because it is Valentine's day and everything." So, I wrapped my arms around her and she folded her long, lanky self around my middle and we watched "Friday Night Lights." And I loved that she asked questions; she always does. She has a great curiosity and she has gathered some pretty right-on perceptions about things at an early age. She's musically talented, playing the piano, violin, and guitar. She told me the other day, most earnestly, "Mom, I really want to grow up to be an actress." Mackenzie strives to be morally right and actually cried last night when she got home and had missed a day of house-cleaning because she felt bad she hadn't done her part. (I do think she was probably a little tired.) I love that Kenzie will be tolerant of my stressing . . . I think she gets me. And I think it's great that she's a list girl. I love that she goes to bed at night and reads for another 2 hours . . . have I mentioned she has the most Accelerated Reader points in her whole school? And when she's done reading at night she starts making plans. While her getting out of bed 2-3 times a night to talk about her plans gets annoying, I get her too! I hope, more than anything, that Mackenzie will be a good friend, to her family and friends. I am blessed that she's our first-born.

******

So, this year, they are my Valentines. They are the ones I work for and live for and love with. While they make me cry, they make me laugh and smile more often. I'm a lucky girl, fer sher!

The business of Scrapfest

2009-02-12T13:47:00.000-08:00

I know I have been M.I.A. from the 'ol blog for quite a bit. Not that I have to blame it on anything, but I do feel like I should explain for those of you who have not been personally around me lately. A few years ago some friends and I put together a weekend away in St. George to get a break and scrapbook and pretty much do whatever. Well, since I coordinated a lot of it the first year, I decided I wanted to make it an event the 2nd year. So, in 2008 we had 67 people (30 more than the first year) and kinda had a little more drama than I wanted to deal with so I promised myself this year we'd keep it small (around 60) so I could host a quality event. Well, long story short, I have issues with saying "no" and by the time last weekend rolled around, we had 80 people registered for Scrapfest 2009.

And we had a good time. Sooo much of the prep work was done before we ever left Vegas and I HAVE to give major props to ma girl, Shawna Ballard, who is totally my partner in crime, er, I mean, in Scrapest. She's THE best ear, she works hard, she doesn't stress out when I'm stressing out, and she's the heavy when I don't have the nerve to be mean. Add to all that the fact that she's fun and funny and totally patient with my controlling/anal self and voila! we have ourselves a good little team.

After everyone registered it's my "job" to settle the contract with the hotel (for the conference room and hotel rooms), and start shopping for fun giveaways and prizes. I was kinda stuck this year in how to give everyone their treasures this year until Shawna found Michael's had their photo boxes on sale. So before we left we met at Shawna's to assemble the welcome boxes with the following:

official Scrapfest t-shirt

pack of gum

a chapstick

ruler, post-it notes, pencil, and glue stick (because that's practical crafty stuffs)

raffle tickets, Most Valuable Page voting cards, and coupons

water bottle with name sticker

Name tag

I'd like to say that everything went flawlessly, but thanks to a HUGE Joanns.com issue there was a lot of stress and panic the week before Scrapfest. My biggest concern with this event has been making the best use out of the monies that people pay to register. I'll sum it all up with this descriptive picture: Thursday afternoon at 1pm I had 159 packets of paper divided and GRATEFULLY my cousin (Jerolyn), sister (Erin), and friends Chris and Shawna came by to help add all the embellishments and get them all packaged. My entire living room was covered and by 5:00pm we had everything loaded in our truck and I was showering ready to hit the road. I also need to give BIG thanks to my dear father-in-law who watched my boys that afternoon for, well, forever, until Tyler could pick them up after work. Trust me, it was panic mode if I didn't even get a picture of it!

The drive to St. George was very relaxing and then I was ready to work. Shawna, my MIL (Dodie) and one of Scrapfest's local talents from St. George (Corinne) came to help put together the conference room with all our tables. The poor Holiday Inn people were so patient since I was creating a vision as we were going. And the room turned out better than I thought, even with all those women. Here's Shawna ready for bed after a long day!

This year people could sign up for an early-bird crop, so Friday morning I was up and shakin'. I walked to Staples to get copies AND worked out all before breakfast so Shawna and I had time to do a little shopping before noon. The Pebbles in my Pocket store was sooo generous with more freebies and a packet for EVERYONE. So cute.

And then the peeps started rolling in. That's my favorite part. I love visiting with the friends I only get to see once a year. There is something cathartic for me about having a group of women in the same room. I think there is a power in it. It revitalizes me. And I find the talent and stories of these women are soo interesting. There are professionals and stay-at-home moms, grandmas and daughters, sisters and friends. I just love it.

Friday at 9pm is the official kick-off even though, by that point, we'd been scrappin' for 9 hours, everyone was there to hear all the skinny. And then the night went on and on and on. and on. and on. I finally turned in at 3:40am, and when I stumbled back into the room at 8:30am there were STILL 3 or 4 or 5 women going at it. Honestly, I couldn't even keep track I was so tired, but I had promised a couple freebie drawings at 8. At 8:30am I literally walked into the conference room so contact-dry-eyed and no-bra-ed that I couldn't believe people were still up or BACK up scrappin' already. We are so die hard at Scrapfest!

By Saturday at 6pm we had the bigger prizes given out and most of the giveaways done. And you'd think at that point everyone would be burnt out . . . oh no. Scrapfest continued until 5am on Sunday. (Trust me, these woman have stamina!) After a quick rest we checked out and headed to the yummy Cracker Barrell for breakfast. I did manage to have some good eats and actually got some pages done for our family albums (although it was not even close to what I planned on doing.) But best of all was hangin' with my peeps. Here's a couple photos:

Me and my Patty. Okay, she's not mine, really, but I just love her and we had such a good time. She was such a sport to sit with me while everyone came up to us to visit or discuss business and every night she had to go to our room to get some sleep as I kept at it. Once a year doesn't seem enough, but I'm glad we've got it.

Me and Babs

With my Mother-in-law, Dodie.

Amy, Robin, Chris, Me, Whitney, Jackie, and Leslie . . . Aren't they smokin'?

Me, Angela, Jerolyn, Jennie, and Erin . . . soo fabulous

(and yes! my cousin Jerolyn IS that funny.)

My SIL, Mindie. I swear next year we need a picture all my family who comes (this year it was my mom, sister, 2 SILs, a cousin, and a cousin-in-law . . . not to mention all their family THEY bring with them.)

This year I wanted to do something more than just be indulgent, so in January I emailed a bunch of companies to see if they would donate to Scrapfest and/or help me with a special raffle I'd like to hold. See, my mom's BFF couldn't make it last year because of stupid breast cancer making an appearance in Marsha's boobies. So Marsha fought and fought and kicked that breast cancer's a$$ and I knew she'd be there, fer sher, this year. Also, I thought about my MIL who's a breast cancer survivor and how breast cancer has affected so many women, so many of those women who'd be at Scrapfest, and I wanted to be able to make a donation in their honor. A couple weeks before we left Provo Craft delivered a brand new Cricut machine to my door. And at Scrapfest I sold raffle tickets to raise $505.00 to donate to the Susan G. Komen foundation!! Isn't that awesome???

Here's the winner, Lisa German:

And finally, so you don't think we're all business at Scrapfest, here's just a couple of pictures of some of the shenanigans . . . totally worth making it to the end of this post, right!?

Here's a video montage with all the pictures I took of the fun ladies!

Scrapfest 2009

See ya in 2010!