When killing your kids is not an option.

I am SO upset with my boys right now. The weather has been beautiful the past couple days and they love to play outside. However, every time they have been out back lately we find within 5 minutes they are throwing stuff into the pool: rocks (mostly), golf clubs, cars, whatever they can find and [today] my decorative frogs that are in the flower beds. Yeah, that's right, the frogs are SHATTERED at the bottom of the spa. Not only am I pissed about having to throw away meaningless pieces of yard art, but also I have no idea how to get the shards of ceramic off the bottom of the spa without getting into the freezing water and pulling the little pieces out. We have just spent over $250 getting the pool sweep fixed from rocks being sucked up and jamming the mechanism. EVERY time I catch them (which takes them maybe 3-5 minutes unsupervised) they have to come inside and are kept inside for the day. WHICH really feels like punishment for me! Their punishment is to sit on their beds, but unless I sit in there with them, Brock climbs up the ladder to Brevin's bunk and within minutes Brevin is bawling because Brock is beating the crap out of him USUALLY with the wooden blocks. I'm thinking "You're 2 and 4, the instructions EVERY TIME they go outside are SO simple. . .don't throw anything in the pool." I told them they couldn't come out of their room for the whole day. I really am ready to follow through with that threat too. Otherwise I may seriously freak out on them. UGH! I am just mad.

DETOX

Let's be glad that blogs don't have our voices recorded because y'all would be fa-reaked out with my manly-sounding tone today. It's an improvement, though, cuz yesterday I hardly had any sound coming out. Oh, yeah, can you say HEY DAY for my boys? I would be yelling at them in a whisper and it had NO effect on them whatsoever. I am feeling better every day and REALLY want to thank everyone for their good thoughts, comments, phone calls, etc. I think the new antibiotics are really working and now all the junk is workin' it's way out. I have to admit I have asked myself a few times this week, "WHY? I would have to get SO sick when I DO NOT have time for that in my life." Here are the two conclusions I have come to. Right before ScrapFest last month I woke up with scratchy throat and stuff, so I bee-lined it for Dr. Wahab who told me I had the beginning of sinusitus, she gave me a prescription, but then told me if I felt better in a couple days not to take the antibiotic unnecessarily being pregnant and all. So, being on a high from the festivities of the St. George weekend, I felt fine and never took the prescription. I am beginning to wonder if this "infection" has been brewing for the entire month of February. It could happen, right? And when I had my migraine on Saturday my defenses were down and BAM I got knocked OUT by this infection. I know, I know, I am not medically trained, but it sounds pretty smart to me and logical, medically speaking. Right?

Okay, but here's the illogical version that I keep wondering about. Since I was having the doosie of the headache on Saturday, I figured it would be a good day to give up my beloved Coke cold turkey. Come Sunday, when I started to get the funky starts of this "infection explosion" I began to wonder if a little sumthin' sumthin' in a sweet red can would alleviate the icks. BUT, I was resolved to not give in for the benefit of baby #5. My theory of why nursing was so painful with Brock was because I was so dehydrated. I hardly ever drank water because I was always nursing a Coke to stay awake on minimal sleep and to maintain the busy schedule of life. SOO, I knew with this one I'd have to make the break before he makes his appearance. Yeah, it's taken me 7 months, but I have committed to not have Coke (or any caffeine which means pretty much soda in general since the sugar is not worth it to me without the zip of the caffeine) until this baby's 6 months. We'll see if that works out. BUT, all that is a digresion from my medical relation to my sickness this week and my no coke zone.

I have found myself, a couple times this week, wondering if my body was retaliating from taking away it's FAVORITE beverage and as part of the detox gave me this sinus and respiratory infection. I mean, I am sure that somehow Coke soothes my nasal passage and keeps my sinuses running better. You know, all those nerves that are psyched out by caffeine influx were probably a little perturbed at the immediate cessation of their daily Coke fix and rebelled a bit by giving me body aches and head aches and a hacking cough (which, I might add, would be soothed VERY well by a Coke.) I am kinda wondering if just the simple, daily sipping of a straw kept my throat active enough to fight off all infections. I know medically this would probably be hard to prove, but I still wonder if I caved to my craving how much more quickly the crud would disappear into a sweet, dark, bubbly bliss. I know, I know this addiction is probably more mental than anything, but you never know. I'm just sayin' I could have had this infection for a bit and it just got too much for my body to fight (I am growing a baby, too) OR it may be a rogue version of detoxing. Watch, this will be on Celebrity Detox with Dr. Drew next season. Don't laugh at me too hard. Oh, well, I'm off for another glass of water. Sigh.

I'm still alive . . .barely

I am still here. Barely. Actually, after a better night's sleep last night compared to the past couple nights, I feel like I can make it through the day. Well, morning, at least. I cannot convince my boys to be less needy, more share-y, and to stop yelling. I suppose a good thing is all the gunk in my head is clogging my ears and I can't hear the boys yelling and whining and complaining. In the past few days of despair, I have to share some things I have made sure to be thankful for:

*A husband who took a 2 hour lunch on Tuesday so I could sleep
* Extra strength Tylenol EVERY 4 hours
* Angie Tanner for bringing in dinner on Tuesday night that my kids LOVED. AND for driving extra carpool. SOO above and beyond!
* Chris Jenkins for bringing dinner last night, which was actually dinner for TWO nights! My kids gobbled it down and Tyler couldn't stop eating last night. Also, thanks for the phone calls and other offers to help with my kids.
* Mindie Barlow for being AWESOME in every way, but mostly being patient enough to take my three kids to the park so I could go to the Dr. and get some rest yesterday. I'm grateful they were run around enough so they had little energy when they got home. And thanks for the slushie. You. are. wonderful
* Amelia Haycock for totally running my kids around to their activities and reminding me to get some rest every time I texted or called her the past couple days.
* Erin, Shawna, Donna, ElRae, Alexis, my in-laws, my mom (and others) have all been SO great to call and check on me; not that I answered many of their calls since it hurts my throat to talk, but I appreciate you checking on me and offering to help with the kids, food, etc.
* One remaining Dr.'s appointment to see my general practitioner at THE perfect time.
* That after a breathing treatment, I didn't, in fact, have pneumonia
* Dr. Wahab. Love her. She's SO up front and honest about things and doesn't mince words, but at the same time is compassionate about my situation.
* A humidifier blowing right in my face
* A baby that keeps kicking so I don't have to worry about him. (That's the nicest way of saying, "What the crap kind of gymnastics is this kid working on?)
* My K*Swiss water bottle that has kept me dehydrated
* Rice pudding. Thanks, Mom.
* Mentholatum.
* Really soft toilet paper . . . FOR MY NOSE! I've been just carrying around a roll for when my nose gets the drips.
* Antibiotics for the serious sinus and upper respiratory infection that I have
* For not having the official flu.

So, thanks for all the comments, too, on the 'ol blog. It's nice to check in online in the midst of my sick-stupor to find out what the healthy are up to. . . Erin?! Orange-licious, still?! C'mon I know you've had the crud, too, but a little sumthin' sumthin'!

People die from this

I'm pretty sure I have the flu. Like, influenza. Like, pioneers and others have died from this. Thank goodness for Tyler's extra long lunch, my SILs support, and my uber-friend/carpool mate Angie who took an extra turn driving today AND who's bringing us dinner tonight. At least I'll die knowing my family is not hungry. BLAH.

What the Crud?!

I knew I had company with the migraine thing, so, to continue with my health woes, I would like to share how I have NEVER been so sick with the cold crud as I am right now. On Sunday afternoon I thought my left-over migraine was taking a funky tone, so I figured I'd take a quick rest with the boys. By the time I woke up I had this annoying little tickle in the back of my throat and I could tell I had some sinus pressure starting to build. Sunday evening just got worse and worse and I went to bed thinking, "Crap, I got the crud." The crud is my medical professional term for the snots (or just sinus pressure) and phlegm that leave you all hacking and coughing and aching. Sure enough, Sunday night was not that restful and I finally got up at 6:15 yesterday cuz I couldn't sleep and I needed to clean my house. I figured I would soldier thru my errands and carpools yesterday, but by the afternoon I was a wreck. I was totally fever-y and could NOT stop coughing which is leaving my throat feeling sore and my muscles worn out as I have to brace myself everytime I hack away. Why would I have to brace? SO I DON'T PEE MY PANTS. Don't laugh, it's annoying. Nothing like childbirth to weaken the old bladder. Last night was even worse and so I have loaded up on vitamin C (thanks to my new juicer and fresh citrus from AZ) and don't plan on doing much today.

I don't mean to keep complaining about my health, so I imagine I will give it another day before I am back on the mend. Thank goodness for Tylenol and lazy days. I have studied my "What to Expect" book and will trying to gargle with salt water here shortly. Lovely. Any quick fix remedies?

Belated Birthday Wishes!

Oh, how I wish I were really good about remembering birthdays and special dates my doing something fun and/or creative and/or thoughtful. It is SERIOUSLY a New Year's Resolution ever year and I seem to blow it by the time the first date comes and goes with me behind on the celebrating. ANYWAY, I just wanted to sent a little shout out to my girl HEATHER MARIE who's birthday was this weekend. Heather and I were Chaparral Choir dorks together (actually, she was always very cool, but I was dorky), we graduated together, and roomed together at BYU our freshman year (which, unfortunately, was my only year at BYU). Heather was THE best roommate EVER and I love her to pieces. She is still so much fun to talk to and hang out with and is one of the best women I know. I mean, really, super mom? It's Heather. Super friend? Heather. Super sister, aunt, daughter, etc? IT'S HEATHER. I'm so excited to be having our babies (her 4th) close by each other again so when we're old and make our husbands and kids hang out together, they'll have people to enjoy while I enjoy my Heather-time.

This was our Christmas card picture (1995) taken outside of DT (which isn't gonna be there much longer). Yes, we send cards with a poem parody and this picture. I can't tell you what a great influence she has been in my life! What memories! Hope you had a great birthday, Heather! I love ya to bits! And one of these days I'll send ya something fun and/or creative and/or thoughtful to celebrate your turning 25 (again!) LOVE YA!

OH My Migraine!

When I in 5th grade, in PE, I had the wierdest sensation that half of my body was going numb. At first I thought it was just weird, but when half of my tongue, nose, and face "fell asleep" I was a little tripped out. Needless to say, I went to the nurse, who called my dad (who was teaching at the same school), who called my mom, who came and picked me up and took me back to her work (a day care center) until I could get into the Dr. I felt fine, for the most part, minus the half of me that felt like it was asleep, so I went outside to play some tetherball to pass the time until we headed to the Dr. My mom was not pleased with me. And, I spose, I looked like a bona fide faker hitting the yellow ball around and around the pole instead of writhing in pain on the day care center's nap mat.

Once at the Dr., a prompt evaluation led to this conversation with my mom and Dr. (sorta like this as I was eleven and the details are a little fuzzy):
Dr: I think we need to admit her to the hospital. There's a chance she may have had a stroke and we need to do more testing.
Mom: Oh, [tears] Sarah, I am sorry I guess you weren't faking.
Me: [In my head] Holy cow this is more serious than I thought; hospital? I wonder if I'll get a new nightgown like Erin did when she drowned??

SO, I was admitted to the lovely pediatrics unit at UMC for a few days and had some MRIs and scans and specialists' visits, etc. Bottom line, I was diagnosed with migraine headaches at the tender age of 11. We went to a special neuro-doctor for several years who was pretty educational and this is what I determined, after the first ten years, about my migraines. #1. They're debilitating #2. Most of mine are hormonally driven #3. I DO have a migraine "allergic" reaction to jalepeno peppers and strobe lights. Now, I come by headaches by way of my father, who has suffered for many years, and it runs in my family cuz some of my siblings get doosies. Imagine my suprise when I married Tyler and he told me he'd never really had a headache!! What a freak of nature that I fell in love with! (He's since had a couple bad headaches since we've been married . . . what does that tell you?)

Saturday morning, since Tyler was gone I decided I'd take the kids to breakfast and get donuts. We ended up at Dunkin' Donuts and as soon as we sat down I got my first symptom of a BAD headache coming on. OF course, I start to freak out because I know I will not be able to cope with my day and my kids if this headache hits as hard as it was indicating it was gonna hit! I was a little panicky cuz Tyler was gone, I couldn't take anything TOO serious being pregnant and all, and I still had to be mom for the day. As I was urging the kids to eat their donuts I was trying to figure out if I could see well enough to drive home (since one of the first symptoms is a light aura that blocks my vision) when Caylee said, "Mom, you don't look so well." AGH! I wasn't. I won't bore you with all the gruesome details of the day, because it was mostly PAIN nonstop, but thanks to my wonderful in-laws who took my boys for 7 hours, my GREAT girls who played so nicely together the whole day to the point that I barely knew they were home, my mom who came and rubbed my aching skull for an hour, three ice packs, and a couple Percocet to help me sleep off the worst of it, I made it through the day, BARELY. I am sure Tyler was thinking, "GREEEAAATTT, just what I want to come home to after a great weekend of fishing!" but he didn't complain once. In fact, he went and filled my gas tank up and got a few groceries before the Sabbath found us busting out the food storage dry milk and us walking to church.

And I'm working on the rebound from the migraine aftermath. I like to call it my hangover headache, that headache that feels like my swollen brain has shrunk back to size and now rattles around in my head any time I move too quickly or there's too much noise. I do take issue with people who throw around having a migraine like it's a cope-able, still run your life, normal headache, but I also know a lot of people know my pain. So a little "holla" to those who's brains are as abnormal as mine . . . one more migraine survived. Yay Hoo.