Friday, April 11, 2008

What makes a best friend?

Tyler and I have often had the discussion about what makes a good friend, a best friend. While I love to surround myself with good women (and some men) as often as I can, and talk to my "best friends" monthly or so (if not more) Tyler can go years without talking to his "best" friends. He maintains that a true best friend is someone you can go years without talking to, and don't even need to, because if/when you need them, they'll be there. Without having daily conversations, or sending holiday greetings, or keeping up with their families' blogs, a best friend is someone who knows they're the best just cuz.

And I have to say I have grown to believe him and understand him (now). I've reconnected with a lot of friends that I haven't kept up with since high school or even junior high (holla! Daniel) and it's like a decade hasn't past. John and Amy Peterson (who I wrote about visiting us at Easter) are some of the BEST friends we have. Tyler and John, like I said served their missions together in France and have a ton of memories together. When we got married and would talk about his mission, Tyler would tell me about the antics of John and their experiences together. John even wrote in Tyler's journal (as the officiator of the ribbon-cutting ceremony for one of Tyler's new journals . . . trust me that was only one of the silly things they did together!) When we were living in Cedar, Tyler and John reconnected their "best" friendship when we went to visit John and Amy in Minersville. Of course, I was so taken by them (enough to stick them on our holiday card list) that we started keeping in better touch (cuz, THAT's how you treat a best friend. Sheesh. A Christmas card is not too much to ask, right?!) Anyway, we've gotten together here and there and always love our visits with the Petersen family. I even bamboozled Amy to come with me to ScrapFest, and just love her all the more I get to know her.

One of the best things about the Petersens is the fun, random packages we get from John. One time he wrote THE funniest newsletter about the BYU fly-fishing team, then we got the "we've named our kid after you" package, so, I KNEW this baby was gonna be good when I checked the mail a couple weeks ago:

See, when the Petersens were here, we talked about my quitting caffeine and how it's never been an issue for Tyler. But one time he found Mt. Dew slurpees and thought he had found a treat that took him back to his happy caffeine-drinking-high-school days. John and Amy mentioned how Utah carries caffeine-free Mt. Dew. Tyler promised to pick himself some Mt. Dew, mormon-style, the next time we were through Cedar. But then, in true, best friend style, the Petersens sent Tyler (well, us) this thank you gift. (Which, was totally unneccessary, but MUCH appreciated!)
This is what I found the next day in TWO places in the fridge ("just in case you didn't see the first sign on one shelf"). Tyler shared (a little) when someone specifically asked, but never with the kids. One night as we were walking to bed, I heard him pop the top of a can and guzzle it on his way to brush his teeth. He said he couldn't resist the Dew.
So, thanks, Petersens! You are so thoughtful and we appreciate your BEST friendship!

12 comments:

The Fatman said...

Caffeine free mountain dew is like chocalate free M&Ms. But best friends are a gem!!

Josh said...

I agree with Tyler. I haven't had a "best" friend since high school, that's what family is to me now. I guess (besides Cassidy of course) my brothers are my best friends now, but those best friends from high school still retain their "best friend" status, and when we do get together, it is like no time has passed at all.

Beth said...

Yep. Best friends are the BEST. Right, Marsha?

Amber said...

Hey girl, so is this the Jon Peterson from Las Vegas? I think he was my home teacher at BYU? Not sure, ask him if he remembers us? His dad worked with my mom too at Stanford. Same guy? If so, small world. :) Also, I'd love to help do the you know what for you know who...I just wasn't sure who has all the emails?

Marsha said...

Yep. You are right Beth! I want to know where you buy those m&m for later on.

Tausha said...

i agree with you both on the best friends thing. It almost seems as if time doesn't pass. When this happes, this is when you know you have a friend who is the cream of the crop!
Pretty great about the C.F. Mountain Dew. You know, that here in utah-they make every kind of drink in a C.F. form. If you ever want any other kind-just holla out to your utah peeps. They will hook you up.
i personally think that caffeine is a must when rasing children. It is a diet coke that i reach for when i feel like i am losing my mind and all is right with the world again! Maybe that is just a utah mom thing-

Doty6strong said...

Aren't men wonderful? So uncomplicated. Talk when you need to talk, don't if you don't need to. On the other hand, I sure do like the connection with my girlfriends. There's nothing better than having a long meaningful conversation with your best friend. If it weren't for wives, I don't think men would EVER keep in touch with their old friends. They need someone to drop that Christmas card in the mail!
Those Utah mormons think of everything-Caffeine free Mt.Dew...CRAZY!

The Fatman said...

I think a best friend is someone who can tell you that they love you and then in the same sentence tell you that you are totally slacking on the Blogs!

Julina said...

I hear you're now in charge of a huge retirement party... How's that all going?

Julina said...

perhaps I should have been more discrete... I hope my last comment doesn't really go anywhere.

John Petersen said...

Nope not the same John Petersen at BYU. There's like 4 of us in every town! In our last ward there were even 2 sets of Amy and John Petersens. Okay they spelled theirs son. Anyway I totally agree with Tyler—he's the best just cuz!

Tyler and I were companions in France for 5 months. Like I tell my wife all of the time she's the best thing that's ever happened to me, well Tyler was definitely the best thing that ever happed to me on my mission.

Sarah only hit the tip of the iceberg when it comes to silliness. One time Tyler challenged me to a contest on who could make their cinnamon bear last the longest. Days later, after I had forgotten about the contest, he celebrated his victory by showing me the little piece of bear that he'd hidden on the handlebars of his bike. I also had this "Mr. Rogers" type sweater that I'd wear once in a while just because he hated it. He named it "Lord Jeff" and when I got transferred I hid it in his luggage. A few weeks later I got a letter that he forwarded to me. On the outside was taped a quarter inch square piece of gray sweater that said, "Here’s what's left of Lord Jeff!" I got Dear Johned with him and he had a running total of days he'd been without a girlfriend letter, and on and on and on.

Best 5 months of the best 2 years!

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