Alrighty, now. It's late, well, no so late, but I am totally wiped. Tyler and I are watching American Idol Gives Back and I can't tell if I am touched or PMSing or disturbed or shocked or what, but I am having a hard time not becoming overcome by emotion, but I am trying to hide it so Tyler won't look at me and say with a grin, "Are you crying?" Shows like this really make me think what a wonderful world I have, how blessed I am, and how I should never complain about anything.
How did that all work out before we came to earth? I believe we existed as Spirits before we came to our families here. I have felt VERY strongly a connection with people not in my family that goes way beyond my experiences with them here in this life. And, I believe, that my friendship and love started in before our friendship and love connected here. I believe I was sent to this earth, also, with things to challenge and try me so that I might learn and grow and become a better person. I ALSO believe that Heavenly Father (my Man, God) loves EVERYONE equally. I can't imagine how painful it would be to watch his "children" suffer as they die prematurely from malaria or AIDS or any of the other maladies in poverty stricken countries. I can't wrap my brain around the conversation between He and I before I came to this earth that went something like:
Me, "Okay, wish me well."
Him, "You'll be great, but I'll try you with things that you'll think are really hard like four healthy kids who are smart enough to have their own opinions, a brilliant, supportive husband that doesn't take the trash out when I want him to, OR how hard it is to keep your mouth shut from eating ALL the conveniently abundant food that you'll have money to buy for yourself and your family. Somehow you'll grow from that like your sister, here, who I am sending to Africa. She's going to bury four of her smart, opinionated kids before they ever turn 8 because they were bitten by mosquitos, OR that sister who will be unknowingly infected by AIDS and leave her kids motherless at the tender age of 28, OR that sister who's family will struggle to eat three square meals . . . she'll live right doen the street from you."
I dunno. Maybe that's too heavy, but I am totally buying in to the we need to donate, give, and sacrifice for the betterment of others. We don't take it with us, right?
That said, Celine and Elvis with the American Idol commercials may be too much for me to pick up the phone and call. It's almost like overwhelmed public persona pressure.
On other Wednesday reports: got up and did a long walk this morning to break up my training, took the kids to get donuts before Kenzie and Caylee and Brevin to school, went to the church to prep for the ward scrapbook night, didn't embarrass myself too badly when I had to get the kids to clean their mess and get in the car, came home for lunch and mandatory naps, worked on the scrapbook pages, and left for Wal-Mart when Tyler got home. Scrap Nite was successful, I think. I enjoy the women, the craft, and the chance to teach. I am feeling, however, a little overwhelmed at so many major responsibilities falling due night after night after night. Last night was camp clinic that we were put on the spot to be in charge of a group when we showed up, LOVE THAT! Tonight was the scrap nite, which of course I had procrastinated getting it all together, and tomorrow is youth conference and another camp leader meeting where a lot of stuff is coming due. And the good news . . . I get to go running in the morning. Woo hoo. Oh, heavens, I better head to bed as I apparantly am too touch-y, PMS-y, disurbed and shocked.